


Kidnapped By Organization XIII

by ButterflyXMoonlight



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2019-09-21 14:33:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 39
Words: 69,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17045492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyXMoonlight/pseuds/ButterflyXMoonlight
Summary: Figurative Summary: [Y/N] was never supposed to become a Nobody. Nobodies can't feel, but they remember what it was like. Might as well take advantage of living without a heart and do what you do best: Remember. All any Nobody has to grasp onto is memory. "I never felt love as a Somebody, but I'm pretty sure this is what it would have felt like."Summary with Spoilers: [Y/N] grew up in Radiant Garden with her friends Lea, Isa, and Ienzo. When she is turned into a Nobody she easily adjusts to her new life as she has amnesia. Axel, Saix, and Zexion are hurt to see that [Y/N] doesn't remember who they are. Slowly [Y/N] starts to uncover the mystery of her past and of Kingdom Hearts.





	1. Chapter I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trust me, it gets better. I wrote this intro three years ago.

It was a day like no other and since [Y/N] was living as a synthesis materials shopkeeper she had to keep her stock full. Every Saturday morning she would go to the ruins in Hallow Bastion to collect more materials. With a small poison dagger she would defeat heartless and pick up what they dropped.

[Y/N] would head out alone and take a few potions. On this day she forgot those vital little healing mixtures. Who would have known that they would be so important?

With her dagger in tow she set out to collect materials to sell. Heartless after heartless and none of them had dropped anything yet. What was going on?

She spot a smaller looking gray heartless. Or was it a heartless? Its insignia was upside down. Nonetheless she had a small battle with it until it disappeared, defeated. Finally for the first and last time that day something had dropped. She picked it up to find a crystal; an S type synthesis material. What a score!

Just as [Y/N] bent over to pick it up she was pushed down. She fell on her stomach and tried rolling to her side. She saw shadows heartless on top of her. They scratched at [Y/N]. She hurried for her dagger and tried to battled them while still on the ground. Just as one disappeared out of about half a dozen a new shadow heartless came. Only it looked much different: its antennae were longer as well as it’s body and legs.

[Y/N] went in for the kill and defeated it. With other shadow heartless surrounding her she hurried to pick up what it dropped only to be knocked down again. Only this time all she saw was black. Nothing but darkness with no end.

\-----

Saix walked out of the dark corridor to see you on the floor in a heap of darkness. He walked over to you and watched as slowly it faded away and your heart floated up into the sky. Somewhere it would become a heartless. It disappeared after a few meters in a dim of darkness. He looked back to you and crouched down.

"Out of everyone to become a nobody for me to retrieve as today's mission...it had to be [Y/N]." He spoke to himself, taking a lock of your [H/L] [H/C] hair between his gloved fingers and touching it softly before letting it go. "If I had a heart, I believe I would laugh in my own _pity_." He lowered his face to your ear and whispered something you wouldn't hear as you were unconscious. _"Do you remember Isa?"_

Getting back up, he picked you up with one arm and created a corridor of darkness with the other. Slowly he walked through with you in his both of his arms. Just what would he tell the superior about you? Should he tell the truth or keep it between him and Axel?

\-----

“It seems I have picked up the wrong person to become apart of us.” Saix notified to Xemnas. [Y/N] lied unconscious on a bed within a room which would be hers.

“Ah, that is fine. We could always use extra hands.” Xemnas looked [Y/N] over, seeing that she could be of help to the organization. Although it had weak members the more to build it up and the greater the strength would be altogether.

“What about her number?” Saix questioned.

“She will not be given one. She shall be known as The Toxic Synthesis. Now I will leave you to awaken her.” Xemnas nodded before turning towards the door.

“Yes, superior.” Saix turned to [Y/N] as Xemnas left the room. “Awaken at once.”

“…uh…huh?” She slowly turned to lay on her side.

“You must regain consciousness.” Saix spoke out to her.

“I’m…alive? Who am I?” Her eyes slowly opened.

“[Y/N]. No number. _The Toxic Synthesis_.”


	2. Chapter II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Out of all the fanfictions sites I use, I'm very happy to see such a great reception from this one. I'm glad to be here! Also, I'm currently taking requests for Kingdom Hearts oneshots as we countdown until Kingdom Hearts III comes out! If you would like to make a request, you can find me under the exact same username on deviantArt, Quotev, and Wattpad.

In front of you stood a blue haired man who seemed about the same age as you with an X-shaped scar on his forehead. You slowly sat up and took in your surroundings. You were in a gray room with a bed and nightstand. There was no other furniture besides your bed and nightstand. No lamp on the nightstand. Only a headboard on your bed. There wasn't even a drawer built into the nightstand. Just...gray beyond the eye could see. You didn't have a window.

“This is your room to reside in. I am your mentor, Saix.” He spoke. His voice was quite deep and you weren’t sure how you felt about him yet.

“I…what am I doing here?” You asked. You looked around again, confused as to why you were here. Maybe he would tell you.

“It will all be explained in due time.” He responded. “Would you like to continue resting or meet everyone else?”

“I’d like to…meet everyone.” You answered in a confused tone. Just who was everyone? How many others were here? Why were you here? Why did you feel…so hollow?

“Let us start with your other mentor.” He walked to the door at the end of the room and opened it. On the other side was a portal. He motioned for you to follow him through it. You timidly got up and followed him through it. Once through the portal you were met with a room filled with them.

“Do these all lead to rooms?” You asked.

“Yes, to the rooms of every member.”

Your eyes took interest in the big portal behind all of the smaller ones. It must have belonged to someone really important. Probably a leader or boss.

Saix started to walk towards another portal with you following close behind. This portal led to the room of a man with spikey red hair and emerald green eyes. He was in a bored sitting position while he played with fire in his hand. At the sight of you and Saix he stood up. Saix confronted him with a hand on his shoulder and whispered something inaudible to you.

”Don’t let her know.”

“Why do I have two mentors?” You asked. Saix stepped away from Axel and removed his hand from his shoulder.

“Our boss doesn’t want me and Isa fighting here.” The red haired man said. Wait, Isa? Who was Isa? Did he mean Saix?

“I no longer go by Isa and you no longer go by Lea. We are Saix and Axel.” Saix said with a sort of snarl in his voice. It seemed more sorrowful than angry.

“Right, right, I got it memorized.” Axel said. So that was his name. He turned to you. “You’re here as a new member of the Organization. Here we go on special missions to help us achieve our one true goal.”

“That goal is to be whole again. You see, we don’t have hearts as we are Nobodies.” Saix added.

“So…we go on missions to be complete?” You questioned.

“Precisely. To complete Kingdom Hearts. Then we can be whole again.” Saix answered you while nodding his head and closing his eyes.

“Well then, time to meet everyone else yeah, [Y/N].” How did Axel know your name? Did everyone already know your name?

“How many others are there?” You asked. Even though your biggest question was answered, you still had a lot more in mind.

“If you subtract me and Saix then you have ten others. Let’s start with number twelve.” Axel started to walk as well as Saix and you followed.

“I…have no number you said?” You asked for confirmation from Saix. He said before that you had no number, but he did called you The Toxic Synthesis.

“No you do not.” Before you knew it you had arrived in another room through another portal and there was a short blonde haired girl also about your age.

“Another girl?” She put a hand on her hip. “I’m Larxene. Don’t be clingy.” She sassily said. You nodded. She seemed a little mean.

“I won’t.” You said and Axel started to lead you away from her to another portal.

“She’s a little…eh, she wakes up on the wrong side of the bed a lot.” He told you.

“So she’s mean?”

“We can’t feel, [Y/N]. We can only remember how to feel.” Saix noted to you.

“What we feel is…what we remember?” You asked. “Then we feel with our minds?”

Axel laughed. “That’s a better way of putting it.” He put a hand on Saix’s shoulder, but he pushed it away. Before you knew it your little conversation had led you to the room of a long pink haired man.

“Ah, a new flower has bloomed.” His attention was drawn towards you. “Don’t be afraid to ask for help every now and then.” He laughed. Probably because he said afraid.

“Oh…okay.” You said.

The next room lead to a blonde haired man. “The name is Luxord. Come along to play a game sometime.” He shuffled his cards in his hand.

“Oh…okay.” You said.

A new portal led you to the room of a dirty blonde haired guy with a mullet. He seemed just a little younger than you. Maybe by a year or two. He sat in his room playing a sitar. Little water bubbles floated around him. When you walked in with Axel and Saix he looked up, the footsteps startling him. The water bubbles fell to the ground.

“Wh-whoa.” He regained his balance. “Oh, a new girl.” He smiled. “Please don’t end up mean like Larxene.” He complained.

“What’s your name?” You asked.

“I’m Demyx.” His smile returned.

“Oh…okay. I’m [Y/N].”

“She sure does talk a lot for a new nobody.” Axel commented to Saix. “Let’s get a move on, [Y/N].” They led you towards a new portal which led you back to the room of portals. “Now numbers eight and seven are me and Saix. So onto number six.” He walked towards a new portal.

This new room belonged to a man about near your age with pale dark blue hair. He looked up, taking notice of you. “Ah, hello.” He was reading a book. He only looked up to greet you then turned a page.

“Um…hi.” You said.

“A word of advice for a new member: be aware of Larxene.” He said while turning another page, not taking his eyes off of his book. Wow, was Larxene THAT mean for even a serious guy to say this?

“What’s your name? I’m [Y/N].”

“My name is Zexion.” He simply replied.

“Uh, we best get a move on.” Axel said as he led you away to another portal. Saix followed you two slowly. He hasn’t said much during this whole meet and greet.

“There are so many people. Do I have to remember all of their names?” You asked Saix, hoping to get a word out of him.

“It would be best if you did.” He curtly replied.

The next room belonged to a very large built older man with auburn hair. He seemed to be training as he was hitting a dummy with a large weapon he had in his hands. Saix cleared his throat and he stopped slashing to take note of you. “Hello. I look forward to any future missions together.” He said.

“And your name?” You asked him.

“I am Lexaeus.” Before you could respond with your usual “oh…okay” Saix led you to another portal. This time it led to a laboratory with a pale blonde haired older man working away.

“Don’t worry, Lexaeus isn’t all that bad.” Axel quickly whispered to you.

“Vexen, we have a new member named [Y/N].” Saix announced. So his name was Vexen. It sounded very scientist-like.

“Ah yes, a new member. Don’t come to me unless you wish to actually help and not cause havoc in my lab.” He said while he continued what he was doing, not taking his eyes off of it at all.

Saix started to lead you away to a new portal. “This next man is named Xaldin.” He said. On the other side was a black haired man about the same age as Lexaeus.

“Hello there, I look forward to any future missions.” He said. You nodded.

“Don’t worry, Xaldin isn’t all that bad.” Axel noted.

“You said the same thing about Lex…uh.” You forgot his name already.

“Lexaeus.” Saix finished for you. Axel and Saix started to lead you to another portal.

“Well, those two were…close when they had hearts.” Axel continued.

“That’s enough.” Saix said. You three were met in a unique room filled with two staircases that led to nowhere. In the middle was a spiral staircase that also led to nowhere. Why were they here for?

Your question was answered quickly when a man came through a portal on the ceiling near the spiral staircase with one gun in each hand. He scared the crap out of you, or at least made you remember what it was like to be scared. His guns magically vanished and he flipped onto the staircase and made his way down, seeing you three at the bottom.

“Well lookie what we have here!” He exclaimed. He seemed a lot older than you, given he had white streaks in his black hair. Little did you know he wasn’t all that older. He was about in his early thirties while you were in your early twenties. He led a hand towards your chin and looked you over once before stepping back when Axel glared at him.

“I get it, I get it. Hands off the new girl she’s still getting used to everything.” He chuckled. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail and he had an eyepatch on one eye. You wondered what the past injury was. “You look a lot- no. Way more cuter than Larxene could ever wish.”

“Xigbar.” Saix sternly said. So that was his name.

“Hey, lighten up Saix. Gotta have a little fun.” He put his hands up in defense.

“The least we can have is remembering how fun feels, right?” You looked up for agreement from any one of them.

“Exactly.” Xibgar put an arm on your shoulder and leaned on you. “Might as well take advantage of that at least.”

“That can be inappropriate. Be sure it doesn’t become a problem.” Saix sternly said as he glared at Xigbar's arm on you. He quickly removed it and put his hands up in defense again.

“Yeah, yeah.” Xigbar said.

“Right, well on to the last one.” Axel led you to the last portal. You three stood in front of the larger portal from before. “This portal leads to the superior’s room. He’s the head honcho, the big boss, we can’t mess with him or you’ll be turned into a dusk.” You were about to ask what a dusk was when Axel laid a finger to your lips. “Ah, ah, you don’t even wanna know.” He smirked.

“The superior isn’t presently at the castle.” Saix spoke.

Axel turned to you. “Well, sometimes he leaves but he’ll be back. You’ll see him someday.”

“Now you have a few days to ‘take it easy’.” Saix said.

“So I…do what now?” Just then your stomach growled.

“Well I guess I can show you the kitchen then lead you back to your room.” Axel chuckled. Axel led you away, bragging about how grand and awesome the kitchen was. Saix stayed behind. When you and Axel were out of sight he walked to his room’s portal. He looked out to the glass wall and sighed. “It was…nice to see you again, [Y/N].”


	3. Chapter III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first six chapters I wrote when I was fifteen. They have since been edited, but you'll see the difference in writing soon.

“Whatever you do today Axel, keep her away from Memory’s Skyscraper.” Saix asked his old best friend a favor. Memory’s Skyscraper didn’t work for everyone, but if it did work on you it was better to be safe.

“Those who seek answers just may receive at Memory’s Skyscraper.” Axel quoted the legend of the skyscraper in Dark City just around and below the Castle That Never Was. “I got it memorized, but she doesn’t seem to remember anything. Maybe it’s your eyes.” Axel attempted to make a joke towards Saix. As Isa, he had emerald green eyes just the same as Axel’s.

“Maybe it’s those tattoos under yours.” Saix retorted with a scoff. There was just no way Axel was ever going to have the same relationship with his old best friend. No matter how much he “missed” the old days in Radiant Garden.

“Anything else to keep her away from?” Axel asked sassily, as he put extra emphasis on else.

“The superior knows nothing of this. Let us keep it that way.” Saix added his final request.

“Alright.” Axel put his hands on his hips before giving a sigh and turning away from Saix. “What if she remembers?” He said as he started to slowly walk away.

“Then it’ll surely warm our hearts, wouldn’t it?” Saix said. Axel snorted at his snarky attempt at a joke. The fate between you three was truly pitiful.

\-----

A few days had passed and Axel decided it was time for you to discover your weapon. These past four days were filled with getting used to things, although you just weren’t fully used to everything just yet.

In the morning Saix would make sure you were awake to bring you to the kitchen for breakfast. He would leave after he escorted you there, saying you didn’t need to be babied on your days to relax. He also said not to get used to him doing this as it was only apart of your getting used to everything routine. As soon as you started missions, Saix would stop escorting you every morning to the kitchen.

You would wander the castle and get used to every nook and cranny. From the library, to the garden, to the laboratory you almost memorized the entire castle so far. During lunch you would usually make yourself a sandwich then eat it as you read a book in the library. For dinner Axel would come get you and eat alongside you in the kitchen. You would talk about the castle and its members.

Now today was the mark of the end of those relaxing four days. To find your weapon was considered your first mission. Now here you were in The Hall of Empty Melodies about to fight…Demyx was his name?

You watched as he summoned his weapon which was a blue sitar. Bubbles surrounded him and it appeared within his hands. Not knowing what to do, you looked to Axel with pleading eyes. He shrugged his shoulders and motioned for you to go on.

“Come on, Axel, this seems barbaric. Why do I have to do your dirty work?” Demyx whined.

“You have no idea what real dirty work is Demyx, that’s what makes you perfect for this job.” He tried encouraging him. “You gotta force this kinda stuff outta them.” Axel was referring to your weapon.

Demyx sighed and gave a strum of his guitar which sent a rush of water towards you. Trying to avoid the attack you stepped to the side but fell backwards. Another rush of water came towards you and not knowing what else to do you put your hands up. You closed your eyes shut tight but never felt the impact of the wave.

You opened your eyes to see it in your hands. A bare blade with no sheath or handle, just long white bandages at the end acting as if it were a grip. You got up and tried to hold it in what you thought was a correct position. Demyx attacked again, seeing you were now ready. As a rush of waves came this time you sliced it in half with your blade. The water went around you and hit Axel instead. He fell this time.

“H-hey!” He exclaimed then sighed. “At least the job is done and you did a good job.”

“I’m not even sure if I’m holding it right.” You admitted sheepishly.

“You defended yourself nicely!” Demyx exclaimed.

“You fought well with great control and you went easy on me.” You turned to Demyx. He rubbed the back of his head.

“I- uh, thanks.”

\-----

Later at dinner that night Demyx seemed bubbly.

“You look especially happy today.” Xigbar mentioned to Demyx with a chuckle.

“It’s nice to be appreciated for once.” He sighed with satisfaction.

\-----

“Our mission for you today is to learn your element.” Axel tried taking the lead from Saix for your mission today. Today he joined you and Axel in your growth mission.

“Her element is poison.” Saix said, making Axel look quite stupid.

“How was I supposed to know that?”

“The Toxic Synthesis didn’t give it away?” Saix smirked. Maybe if he had a heart, he would have laughed at Axel.

“Ah, well, here.” Axel handed you something. It was an element. “It’s a poison element, use it to cast a poison spell.” He directed.

“Um…at what?” You questioned.

“Why don’t we try it on The Flurry of Dancing Flames?” Saix suggested.

“How about The Luna Diviner?” Axel also suggested. You covered your mouth with your hand, remembering the feeling of a giggle. It seemed like it would be funny to see these two fighting like this. So that explained about them not getting along so well.

It seemed like it was your choice as to who to cast the spell on. Axel or Saix? Both of them did show you help as mentors. It just didn’t feel right to inflict poison upon either one of the two. You looked around The Hall of Empty Melodies, hoping for a better option. Just then you spot Xigbar walking on the platform above, whistling a tune.

“Uh…” You mumbled as you faced Xigbar and focused your power to create the spell and hit him. Just as you felt you had got it right Xigbar’s whistling came to a stop. It was replaced with a very horrible sounding gag and laughter coming from Axel.

“HAHA, THAT’S RICH.” Axel shouted between laughs. "NICE ONE, [Y/N]."

“I didn’t want to hurt you two but…” You looked to Xigbar above and winced.

Saix gave a sigh and snapped his fingers. You looked to Xigbar and a green symbol appeared above him. It must have been a cure spell. “I understand the circumstances, but be more careful next time.” He said.

“Hey! What gives?” Xigbar exclaimed then used his element, gravity, to teleport to the floor you three were on. “Now just who was that? Not cool, dudes!” The Freeshooter glared at Axel until he stopped his laughing and wiped a tear. You took a step back.

“Sorry.” You said.

Xigbar turned to you and his cold glare melted away. “Well, if it was just an accident from such a babe like you of course I could let it slide.” He smirked. You sighed, glad that he said it was okay.

“Xigbar.” Saix grunted to address his flirting towards you. He put his hands up in defense as usual and backed off and away. Saix then turned to you. “Your magic is passable. Mission cleared. You are dismissed.”

“C’mon [Y/N], I’ll take you to get some ice cream. You deserved it.” Axel said as he led you away into a dark corridor. Saix watched you two disappear into the darkness.

 

“Beware that you don’t cross the line, Lea.”

\-----

It was your first mission outside the castle in a world called Olympus Coliseum with Demyx. It was to accompany him in some recon. The whole mission was silent as you took silent footsteps with Demyx. Yours always seemed a little noisy and his always completely silent.

“You’re good at this. You’re so quiet.” You whispered to Demyx about mid-mission.

“I- Thanks, [Y/N].” He said as he continued with his silent footsteps.

Demyx always complained about fighting missions. Maybe recon was his favorite kind of mission. The rest of the mission he took note of his surroundings, the people there, and how they lived all in silence. A few times you almost gave your cover away because your footsteps were just a little scuffy sounding. By the time the mission was over your feet hurt from trying to be quiet the entire time.

You tried to open a corridor of darkness to go back to the castle, only you still weren’t very good at it yet. Demyx brought his hand up and opened one instead. You were just about to walk through when he stopped you.

“Here.” He placed something in your hands. “This is for you.” You looked down at it to see a bright and sparkly synthesis crystal.

“Oh, thank you.” You said before looking at it once more then pocketing it.

“It’s thanks for being nice the other day.” He said. “Not that you weren’t nice today because you were.” He added on quickly while sheepishly rubbing the back of his head.

You gave Demyx a nod before heading into the dark corridor. So that’s what it was for. He was remembering the feeling of being thankful. You didn’t like thinking of feelings instead of actually feeling them, but it didn’t feel much different. It was like pretending you had a heart. Did feelings really come with a heart anyways? You were able to think of them just fine. Maybe it was better to think than feel.


	4. Chapter IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, there are typos. If you see any, please let me know.

“Superior, superior!” Vexen shouted as he hurried to The Proof of Existence; the room filled with portals to everyone’s rooms. He rushed up the stairs and into the largest portal in the middle which led to the highest rooms in the castle, which all belonged to Xemnas. Papers were flying about while he gripped them tightly, awaiting to be read and explained. “Xemnas.” Vexen said as he finally reached the superior.

“Yes, Vexen.” Xemnas turned to The Freezing Scholar. “It seems you have something of much importance to show me.” He extended his hand and Vexen gave him the papers. As he skipped them over he explained.

“I’ve made a groundbreaking discovery. The details aren’t all very explained but it seems that-“ He was cut off by Xemnas, who now seemed to understand the situation.

“There may or may not be a shadow of a heart within few or even all of us.” 

“Y-yes!” Vexen stammered. “You see, it’s not like a shadow.” He paused thinking of a word. “It’s more of a hollow radiance. Being a nobody with only a body, mind and soul and our hollow parts where a heart should be has an exact shadow of a radiance. I’ve tested it on my observations of others and their reactions and it has come to my understandings that-“ He was once again cut off by the superior who now understood it all.

“We can feel few emotions?”He asked for confirmation.

“Precisely. Most emotions we can only remember how they feel, but the more stronger ones are more of a presence we can feel. Stronger emotions being anger, love, and sorrow.” Vexen finished explaining. Xemnas gave a sly smirk.

“I see...” He trailed off. “Call in a meeting, and if you will alert Saix as well.” He sent Vexen off.

\-----

The Grey Area was a room with a huge window wall. Outside you could see nothing but darkness in the castle. It was the room everyone went to before departing on a mission, as well as finding out if they had a mission that day or not. Today a paper was posted on the glass window. You walked up to it seeing that it read: We are having a meeting today.

Meeting? Where would that even be? Now that was one thing you did not yet know about the organization. You then remembered the feeling of worry. What would you do if you couldn’t find the meeting room?

“[Y/N].” You turned to see the guy who was around your age. He had steel blue hair and gray-blue eyes. He was the one who read his book the entire time when you met him. What was his name again?

“Zexion.” You say quickly. He turns to the paper and briefly views it.

“Do you know how to get to the meeting room?” He turned to you, asking. It was like he saw right through you. Or at least he knew this because is the was first meeting to be held since you came here.

“I don’t, actually.” You admit. He opens a dark corridor and gestures for you to go in first. You give him a nod, remembering the feeling of thanks. When you walk out you appear on a chair. Was it yours? You looked around and saw that everyone was already here and all in number order. You didn’t have a number, so you only hoped you were in the right seat. To your right was Larxene and to your left was someone you hadn’t seen before. He had silver hair and orange eyes. Was this the superior?

Your question was quickly answered when he spoke up. “Now that everyone is here we may start.” He took a pause. “Vexen has came in with a groundbreaking discovery for us being called Nobodies. We are made of a body, mind, and soul but alas have no heart. Only a hollow area where it should be.” He motioned for Vexen to continue where he left off.

“It is difficult to explain as I am trying to understand it more myself, but it seems it isn’t as empty as we thought to be. A shadow, or hollow presence or radiance is inside of some or even all of us.” He explained.

“Are you saying some of us have remnants of a heart?” Zexion questioned.

“Something quite similar to that. There are no words to explain it. Scientific terms aside, it seems that we can experience stronger feelings but only remember how other emotions feel.” He answered. "Perhaps...we have a fragment as our individual heartless have the remainder of our hearts."

“What just what are those stronger emotions?” Xaldin asked.

“Hatred, love, and sorrow.” The superior answered. Everyone started to mumble to each other and themselves. This continued for a minute or so until the superior called silence on you all. The room fell silent once again. “That is all. You are dismissed. Enjoy the rest of your day off.” People started to dark corridor themselves away from the meeting room one by one.

You still weren’t so sure if you could create one yourself just yet, but you tried your hardest. You fell in through the darkness you created and appeared in your room.

“Hatred, love and sorrow…” You mumbled. Just then someone came into your room. It was Saix.

“You have a mission today.” He said. That was kind of unfair. You had a mission today but no one else did? “I am to watch you train.” Oh, well that made more sense. You stood up and followed Saix through a corridor of darkness which led to The Hall of Empty Melodies. You watched as Saix summoned something you haven’t seen before.

“What are they?” You asked while summoning your weapon.

“These are dusk nobodies. You are to defeated a few then take on a high ranking nobody.” He explained. You then started to attack, dodge, and even fall down a few times. You did get back up every time and before you knew it all of the dusks were gone.

“And the high ranking one?” You questioned after you felt it was over.

“Yes.” He summoned a new nobody. This one had samurai swords which somewhat resembled yours. Only they had actual handles and sheaths. “This is a Samurai Nobody. It is your own personal type of nobody. We all have our own personal nobodies to summon and command at will.” He then summoned a larger nobody with a huge, flat weapon. “As these are mine.” He then snapped his fingers and it disappeared.

“So I have to fight one of my own?” You asked.

“Unless you are ready to control it yourself.” Then it lunged at you with a rush attack. You blocked its attacks a few times. After a while you decided to see if you could send it away. You snapped your fingers and nothing happened. You decided to block a few more attacks for a while then you tried snapping your fingers again. This time it disappeared and reappeared by your side. You looked to the Samurai and it stood there, not harming you.

“It’s like a pet.” You mentioned before snapping your fingers again and it vanished from sight.

“You did well today, [Y/N]. You are dismissed.”

\-----

After a while of wandering the castle you came across Axel. His eyes brightened up at the sight of you and you couldn’t help but hide your mouth with your hands to fight back a smile.

“[Y/N], you wanna go get some ice cream?” He asked. You started to play with the tips of your [H/L] [H/C] hair and decided.

“Sure.” You then followed Axel into a dark corridor. On the other side you found yourself on the side of the ice cream shop in Twilight Town. Axel walked up to the counter and ordered two sea salt ice cream bars. He came back with the ice cream and handed you one.

He made another dark corridor once you were out of sight of any residents and you two walked in. This time you were on top of the clock tower, still in Twilight Town. You both sat on the edge and watched the sunset, as usual if you two went to get ice cream.

“Saix gave me a small mission today.” You said, starting a conversation.

“How’d ya do?” He asked.

“He said I did good.” You answered. You took a bite of your ice cream.

“Did he say exactly that?” Axel licked his ice cream.

You tried your best to muster the best Saix voice you could before answering him. “You did well today, [Y/N]. You are dismissed.” Axel looked at you with wide eyes at your impression before he burst out laughing. You giggled beside him.

“That sounded exactly like him.” He wiped a tear then spoke with a serious tone. “He never used to be that serious when he had a heart.” Axel sighed. “Him and I were good buddies. Best friends, in fact.” He looked to you. His eyes seemed to be filled with sorrow. Whether today’s meeting was true or not, you could really feel that Axel felt sad.

“What’s that look for?” You asked. You took a lick of your ice cream on the sides before it melted.

“Nothing bad.” Axel looked back to the sunset. “It’s just…” He started. “You make me feel like a kid with ice cream.”

“I remember that feeling.” You smirked.

“If we can remember, or even feel those three strong emotions, then we might as well be actually feeling. Right?” Axel took a bite of his ice cream.

“I think we feel with our minds. So it’s artificial. Those three feelings must be hollow and not complete without a heart, but it’s better than nothing.” You said.

“That’s a mouthful.” Axel said, trying to lighten the mood from its serious tone.

“Of ice cream!” You exclaimed as you reached over and took a bite out of Axel’s ice cream.

“Hey!” He protested. The both of you laughed. Inside of you, you wondered why happiness wasn’t apart of those strong emotions because you were sure feeling that right now.


	5. Chapter V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just two more chapters then you can stop cringing from 15 year old me.

Zexion knew it the second you stepped into his room on that fateful day. You walked in not knowing who he was. He was shocked to see you, but you didn’t recognize him. This drowned his spirits. You were the girl he once had feelings for in Radiant Garden. He wasn’t able to realize how strong these feelings were before the accident.

But what he did know was the sting of pain when you didn’t look at him the same.

He clearly remembered how you would greet him. Every morning on his way to the castle, there would be your smiling face. Some days you would have a lunch for him and he appreciated it every time. He only wished he could have given you better presents in return. You were always happy either way with a new synthesis material.

But you didn’t know your past self.

\-----

About a week had passed before you were sent on another mission. Your missions came in slowly as Saix said, the Superior didn’t want to overwhelm you so quickly. He also said you should be grateful, but you didn’t quite understand how worked the others were with missions.

This mission was with Zexion to do some recon in a world called Wonderland. So far the mission had been entirely quiet as the world was covered with card soldiers. This place had a very stubborn queen with very stubborn cards and a very weak king with no say.

Zexion was very good at staying quiet being a master of illusions and all. You wondered if he could make it easier to not be spotted with his element. The Cloaked Schemer was very underestimated.

“I believe it would be best if you didn’t space out.” He told you. His tone was sort of sarcastic and what made it more threatening was he said it in a harsh whisper.

“I’m sorry. You’re just good at staying silent.” You admitted.

“We’re just about done here anyways.” He said while crossing to a bush across the room. He motioned for you to follow. Behind the bush was a dark corridor that led back to the castle. The two of you quickly reported to Saix and then just like that, the mission was over.

“Wait, Zexion!” You called quickly. You started to follow him only to bump into Xigbar. “Oh, I’m sorry.” You quickly apologized, hoping to get away fast. You wanted to ask Zexion if he was the one who organized the library. You went in there sometimes on your days off.

“It seems you’re always apologizing to me, babe.” Xigbar smirked.

“Um, I wanted to ask-“ You tried to explain that you were in a hurry, but you were cut off instead.

“We have a mission together tomorrow. Stay sharp.” He tasseled your [H/C] hair then walked away. You decided to give up on finding Zexion. It wasn’t even that important anyways.

\-----

Halloween Town was a quiet and dark place. It was scary looking and really lived up to its name. You walked through the dark corridor and stepped into the world. You seemed to be in a graveyard with very large tombstones. You weaved around them, somewhat goofing off. You knew you had to find Xigbar but-

“Boo!” Xigbar appeared above you, upside down using his gravity element. You held your heart, or at least where it would have been and gave a little “kyaa!” of terror. Well, so much for finding Xigbar. He chuckled for a while after scaring you.

“I knew I had to find you, but I didn’t think like this.” You pouted for a few seconds. Then stopped just as he wiped a tear from laughing.

“You should have seen your face! It was adorable!” He kept laughing. He held his stomach and killed the silence of Halloween Town. How weird to be laughing this hard in a graveyard after scaring you.

“Okay, okay. It was funny.” You said, hoping to get him to stop laughing.

“I’m sorry.” He said with a smirk before coming down and onto his two feet. You wondered where his body that was hidden in that dark hole he made would go.

“Who’s apologizing now?” He raised an eyebrow. You got him on that one. You had been apologizing to him all the time. There was that time with the poison, then last week when you burnt his toast during breakfast, and yesterday when you bumped into him. “Now we have to collect some hearts so…” You trailed off.

“How about I start with yours?” He suggested. That would have been smooth, if you had a heart.

“What heart?” You shot him down. You still weren’t aware that what Xigbar had been doing was flirting. You figured he was just teasing you or something. Xigbar soon caught onto the idea of you being oblivious to his flirting. He then started to follow you to wherever you believe there would be heartless.

“Do you even know what flirting is?” He asked after some silence. You two had already taken out a few heartless. Mostly Xigbar was the one to take them out given his weapon was more of an advantage and he was The Freeshooter.

“Yes. Why have you been flirting with me?” You asked. A shadow heartless came running at you. You summoned your sword and took it out.

“As if!” He lied.

“Why are you lying?” You asked.

“Wait, so you knew I was flirting?” He shot a nearby heartless.

“You just told me now so I put two and two together.” You said. “We’ve hit the number of hearts to collect, time to go home.” You raised your hand to make a dark corridor, but still you had trouble with it at times. Xigbar made one himself and motioned for you to go in first.

“[Y/N]!” You were met with an excited voice when you came through the portal. It was Demyx. “Can you help me make some lunch? I wanted to follow a recipe, but Saix doesn’t trust me with the oven by myself.”

It seemed that already your days had become more and more busy.


	6. Chapter VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For fifteen, I still had a pretty good idea. Not much OOCness as I had originally thought there was.

“Weeks can turn into months that pass and she will never realize.” Saix looked up to the blank sky. It was empty for now, until Kingdom Hearts would appear. He turn around and looked Axel in the eye. “The time may never come.”

“I think she’ll remember someday. “ Axel had a look of hope in his eyes. He then glared slightly at Saix. “Are you saying that you don’t believe in her?”

“What I’m saying is that it would be best if she didn’t remember. You know what could happen.” He started to walk out of his room. Axel opened a dark corridor, seeing that the conversation was just about over.

“Even if we loved her then, we can’t now in this next life.” Axel disappeared into the dark corridor. Saix turned to look at the empty sky once more before he left the room.

\-----

“Hey, [Y/N]!” Someone called your name from behind a couch in one of the many rooms in the castle. This room happened to be a tv entertainment room. Behind the couch was Xigbar. Someone was sitting on the couch, it was Lexaeus.

“Yeah?” You questioned. Xigbar motioned for you to come over next to him quietly. You followed to where he was and crouched down.

“Look at what he’s reading.” Xigbar gave a snicker and you slowly went up to look over Lexaeus’ shoulder. Oh, the book was none other than Fifty Shades of Grey. Wasn’t that a dirty book?

“Lexaeus!” You gasped. “Get a room!” The large man was startled, thinking he was alone and shut the book closed.

“Technically I am in a room when I thought I would be alone.” He sternly said before getting up and creating a dark corridor. He walked through with a grunt, he must have been embarrassed or upset.

“That was…traumatizing.” You turned to Xigbar.

“As if! You should see Saix’s collection of romance novels he took from Zexion’s library!

\-----

A lot would happen in that tv entertainment room. This time it had to do with Axel. You were alone going to get a glass of water from the kitchen. You walked past the room only to hear the tv was on. You walked in to see who was watching tv at this early morning hour.

It was Axel. He was watching something in a different language. Spanish, was it? There was dramatic music playing and Axel had tissues while be sobbed uncontrollably while watching the…novella.

“So those tattoos are authentic?” You said while you started laughing. Axel turned and tried to wipe his tears quickly and then turn off the tv. He rushed around for a few moments while he tried to turn off the tv.

“Where’s the remote?!” He shouted. He frantically searched for it before he gave up and turned it off the old fashion way. Axel sighed and turned to you. “I can explain…” He trailed off.

“No need to!” You continued to laugh.

“Uh, wanna go get some breakfast?” He suggested.

“At this hour? Axel it’s like five am!” You turned to his many tissues on the floor. “Actually, yeah let’s go.” The two of you walked to the kitchen where you were originally headed to. Just as you were about to walk in you heard someone singing. You stopped in your tracks.

“What gives? What is it?” Axel questioned.

“Shh!” You said and grabbed his arm before he could walk into the kitchen. The two of you peaked your heads out of the corner of the doorway to see the Superior singing How Can I Make a Man Out of You while making some toast. The two of you didn’t know whether to laugh or be scared.

“I guess breakfast can wait.”

\-----

“Hey Demyx, if your element is water and Vexen’s is ice…then are you related?” You asked during breakfast. Demyx, Axel, Xigbar, Luxord, Vexen, and Saix were present.

Demyx was eating cereal with you and Axel. Xigbar was having some toast, which you usually burnt by sticking your bread in with his which increased his cooking time. Luxord was having some tea while reading the newspaper of The World That Never Was. Vexen and Saix were drinking coffee. Although Saix has some paperwork across his side of the counter where he was sitting.

You, Demyx, Xigbar, and Axel were sitting at the table. Saix, Vexen, and Luxord were sitting at the counter in the middle of the kitchen.

At your question many reactions occurred. Axel starting laughing instantly, banging the table and calling out “THAT’S RICH!” as he would usually say when you said or did something hilarious; usually without knowing. Luxord gave a small chuckle. Saix crackled a smile and held back a small chuckle, which only you noticed. Xigbar joined Axel with his table smacking and laughing.

Finally, Vexen spit out his coffee onto Luxord’s newpaper which he then threw down in disgust where it landed onto Saix’s paperwork. Saix’s small smile faded.

Demyx gave a look of disgust whilst shouting “Ew! Nuh uh am I related to Vexen!” and he then threw his hands up in the air, which resulted in his cereal flipping up and landing on Xigbar and Axel.

“All I did was ask a question.” You said while everyone paused to realize what had just happened. You started to laugh. Saix grunted and gathered his paperwork and left the kitchen. Zexion walked into the kitchen as Saix left to see the scene of Xigbar and Axel covered in cereal, while Luxord had a coffee stained newspaper with Vexen wiping his mess off the table.

“Should I even ask?” Zexion muttered to you as he passed by. He went into a cabinet and grabbed a tea packet and prepared some hot water.

“I’m not related to Vexen!” Demyx shouted.

“You are dead though.” Axel summoned his chakrams.

“Couldn’t have said it any better myself.” Xigbar summoned his arrowguns.

“All I did was ask a question.” You repeated yourself. Zexion let a small chuckle slip out.

\-----

“Uh…Zexion?” You walked up to The Cloaked Schemer in the library. “What’s yaoi?”

“And just where did you hear that word from?” Zexion was reading a book. He closed it immediately.

“In this English to Japanese dictionary. I randomly opened it to this page and the definition for yaoi was crossed out.” You showed him the book. He gave a sigh and snatched it away from you.

“Yaoi is a term for…er…” He started. You tilted your head in confusion. “I’m going to burn this book.” He grunted as he threw it into the fireplace.

“Whoa! Zexion! What’s wrong?” You asked. He lit a match and threw it into the fireplace. The logs started to burn.

“Let’s just say…yaoi is a Japanese term for homosexuality.” Zexion turned away from the fireplace. “I don’t even know why my library would have that book in the first place.”

“Oh…um.” You trailed off.

Somewhere in the distance lied a snickering Axel and Demyx.

\-----

“Xaldin, Saix told me you would know where The Supermarket That Never Was is.” You approached him in The Gray Area. He shook his head no. So he didn’t know where it was.

“Ask Marluxia. He should be in his garden.” He said. You nodded with a thanks and walked off to the garden. You didn’t talk to Marluxia much, or really Xaldin for that matter. You mostly just spoke to Axel and Demyx. Sometimes Saix and Xigbar. Luxord wasn’t a stranger to you either.

Your thoughts soon had you accidentally bump into Marluxia from a distraction.

“Ah, [Y/N]. Anything I can help you with?” He asked.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where The Supermarket That Never Was is, would you?”

“I’ve never been there myself, but Larxene has. She’s over at the tree in the middle of the garden.” He pointed to her in the distance. You slowly walked up to her and repeated your question.

“Why do you need to know where the supermarket is?” She snarled.

“I uh…it’s something you might relate to…” You trailed off.

“What do you mean?” She glared at you for a few seconds before realizing. “OH! THAT!”

And that was the end of your tampon quest.

\-----

“Saix you have a diary?” You looked over his shoulder from a desk in the library where he was sitting and writing into a hardcover book.

“It’s not a diary.” He shut the book closed. “It’s a…” He trailed off for a second. “My uh…cookbook.” He admitted.

“You cook Saix?” He sheepishly nodded and you giggled. “Make me something sometime.” You started to laugh more and walk away from him.

Saix watched you walk away laughing. As soon as you had left the library he opened his book again and skimmed the pages. That was a close one. If you had found his daily log...

“She can’t remember.”

\-----

“Hah! Go fish!” You shouted when you didn’t have a seven which Luxord asked for. He smirked and reached into the deck for a new card. This was a good game.

“You go fish!” Someone shouted from behind you. You turned to Axel who held a goldfish in a plastic bag filled with water. Demyx took the bag from Axel and tipped it over onto you. It took a few seconds before you realized what had happned.

“Hey Axel, remember that one time I practiced my element and I aimed it at Xigbar instead?” You mentioned.

“Uh oh.” He started backing away with Demyx.

“I think it’s time for me to practice again.”

\-----

It was there lying on the desk in the library. He must have forgotten it. You picked up Saix’s so called cookbook and skimmed through the pages. You found it to be a daily log instead. So you were right, it was a diary. You read a few passages. Most of them consisted of one sentence entries.

_Day 1: Why are we called Nobodies when we have no heart?_

You turned a page.

_Day 4: He’s changing our names. I am no longer Isa, but Saix. Day 5: I wonder what happened to my beloved. Is she still alive and safe? Day 6: I should have told her my feelings while I still had them._

You turned another page.

_Day 9: I miss the twinkle in her eyes. Day 10: Who would have known that first kiss would be our last?_

You paused before turning the page.

_Day 13: Would be it be best if I had forgotten about her? Day 14: I miss her laugh. Day 15: Was I in love?_

Should you be reading this? You flipped a few pages.

_Day 55: I forgot the color of her eyes. I believe mine have changed color. Day 80: I forgot the way she would say my name._

It seemed not every day there was an entry.

_Day 160: “Do you believe in love, Isa?” Day 162: “Do you think you’ll ever be in love?” Day 163: Her smile, her laugh, the way she called my name. Day 164: She never insulted me. Day 165: She was always kind, sweet, and thoughtful._

Was it wrong to read this?

_Day 167: She was a good listener. Day 168: She encouraged me to follow my dreams and do my best. Day 169: She was confident. Day 170: She followed her dreams. Day 171: “Thank you, Isa.”_

Should you stop there?

_Day 199: There’s never a day I don’t think of her. Day 212: “We’ll always be together forever, Isa.” Day 213: “Is there something you wanted to tell me?” “I…no.” I should have said it. She didn’t deserve my foolishness. Day 223: Axel spoke to me today. As childish as his statement was, it was entirely true. I am acting like an “emo teenage boy.” Day 224: There is no need to write in this daily any longer._

You looked at the date of the last entry and picked up a pen.

_Day 230: Saix, were you in love once?_

Over the course of a few days you two used the book to respond to each other.

_Day 231: …I was Day 232: Are you still in love? Day 233: Please stop writing in this, [Y/N]. Now. Day 234: I wonder who she was. I only skimmed a few entries. I’m sorry, Saix. Day 235: Begone from this and never read any more. Day 236: I’m sorry. This is the last time I’ll write._

Saix knew he should have never left his daily log in the library. He locked it in a drawer in his room and continued to write entries in it.

_Day 237: I wonder what entries she read. Day 238: She’s still the same._


	7. Chapter VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few weeks ago I remember re-reading the first six chapter after not writing for 3 whole years. I had no idea how to continue it without scrapping it and restarting. On my deviantArt, there was a comment from someone telling me that if I ever continued it, they would love to see Roxas...thus why Roxas suddenly appears. (Said person was glad to come back and see Roxas in the update three years later.)

"Roxas?" You asked Axel.

Apparently there was a new Nobody that was under Axel's care. He came to your room early this morning to let you know that he wanted to share being his mentor with you.

"So is this the same thing as shared custody over a child?" You chuckled. Axel rolled his eyes.

"Very funny, but I'm being serious [Y/N]. I think you're ready to take something like this on. I trust you. Got it memorized?" Axel handed you a paper. You looked it over. It was a very observations of the new Nobody.

"So he doesn't want to meet anyone yet?" You asked.

"Look again."

 

He has yet to wake up...it's been about 12 hours.

 

"So I'm just supposed to watch him sleep?" You asked.

 

"Uh...if you can, yeah. I sorta asked Saix to clear your missions for the week so you could." Axel scratched the back of his head. He was hiding something. You had an idea for what it might be.

 

"You're dumping me with the kid while you go on missions?!" You exclaimed. You lightly punched Axel on the shoulder.

 

"You don't mind, right?" Axel tasseled your hair. You pouted and then sighed, giving in to his favor. You shook your head yes.

 

"I'll head over to his room." You summoned a dark corridor and thought of a room for a Number Thirteen. Hopefully it took you there.

 

\-----

 

About 5 hours had passed and the new Nobody hadn't moved an inch. He was turned to the side so you couldn't even see his face. Curiosity got the best of you, so you decided to walk over to his bed. You turned him over a bit to get a glimpse of his face. He had spikey blonde hair, a way different kind of spikey compared to a lot of the other hairstyles in the organization. You wondered what color his eyes were.

 

"Should I...?" You asked yourself out loud. You tried to resist doing it, but you just couldn't. You were way too immature not to.

 

You lightly put your finger abode his eyelashes and pulled his eyelid up slightly.

 

White...white...white...oh! He had blue eyes.

 

Suddenly you were pushed away with a hand very gently. It felt as if there was no strength behind the gesture.

 

"What...are you doing?" You almost screamed as you backed up and held your hands against your body, scared.

 

"I'm s-s-sorry!" You exclaimed. Great. Now what was Axel going to say since you probably tainted the new Nobody and made any way of you introducing him to everyone, super awkward.

 

"Where am I..?" He trailed off and looked around, seeming to have totally forgotten that you just molested his eyeball seconds before.

 

You smirked then immediately gave a straight face. You decided to mock Saix for when he introduced you on your first day waking up.

 

"I am The Toxic Synthesis. I am a Nobody."

 

"Nobody? But..." He didn't finish his sentence.

 

"You are Number Thirteen, The Key of Destiny, Roxas." His eye lit up. Maybe he remembered being given his name before he fell asleep?

 

"..." He didn't respond.

 

"You are a Nobody as well. You..." Slowly trailing off, you suddenly didn't know where to begin. "Look, kid, you don't have a heart. I don't have a heart. Now we're gonna go meet other people without hearts." You grabbed his hand and helped him up. He stared at you with a lost look in his eyes. Once again, he didn't respond. He gave a very confused nod. You opened a dark corridor that would lead you to the Proof of Existence.

 

"Choose a door, any door." You said. Roxas gave you a blank look, then pointed to the big one in the back. "Um...any door but the big one, kid." You then realized that Roxas didn't seem so far away in age from you. You should probably stop calling him kid.

 

He pointed to the door right next to the Superior's. It was Larxene's. "Uh, sure that's acceptable." You dragged him into the room. "Hey anyone home?" You asked. You didn't see her. You weren't as scared to introduce Roxas since you developed a better relation with Larxene ever since the tampon fiasco.

 

"[Y/N]? What a surprise." You heard Larxene's voice as well as footsteps. She came around a corner then was in front of you and Roxas. "And what do we have here?"

 

"Number Thirteen, Roxas." You said.

 

"Finally!" She exclaimed. "I'm not the lowest number anymore."

 

Roxas looked to you then to Larxene. He didn't say anything.

 

"He doesn't talk much...um...I'm gonna go take him to see Number Eleven now." You walked out of her room and into the portal next to hers.

 

"Excuse me?" You asked.

 

"Yes?" He responded. He was facing a plant and cutting a few leaves that looked dead. You believed this was called pruning.

 

"We have a new Number...Thirteen. His name is Roxas." Marluxia turned and gave a smirk.

 

"I see..." He looked Roxas up and down. "He's so small."

 

"He also isn't much of a talker. We'll be going now."

 

"Alright then, I'll see you around."

 

You took Roxas into Luxord's room. He seemed to be polishing his cards. "May I help you?" He asked without looking up.

 

"This is Roxas, Number Thirteen." Luxord looked up.

 

"Ah! I see." He went over to a bookshelf and pulled out a cheap deck of cards. He handed it to Roxas. Roxas stared at it for a while until you showed him that his coat had pockets. He pocketed the cards. "It's...a housewarming gift." Luxord said. He looked a little bit offended. "He doesn't nearly talk as much as you did." He added.

 

"Hahaha...yeah..." You slowly backed out of Luxord's room and took Roxas into Demyx's room.

 

"Anyone here?" You asked as you walked into the door. You spotted him on his bed, strumming his sitar. He had a pencil in his mouth and music paper on a stand. Was he actually writing a song? "Hello?" You asked again. He didn't look up. You let go of Roxas' hand and told him to stay put. You looked at Demyx's paper. For [Y/N]. You also noticed that he had headphones in.

 

"SITARS ARE COOL!" You yelled. He dropped his sitar and screamed.

 

"[Y-Y/N]!" He shouted back. He grabbed his chest and tried to catch his breath.

 

"Um...we have a new member, dude. His name is Roxas, Number Thirteen." You went back to Roxas and grabbed his hand. Demyx stared at your hands for a while before shaking himself out of his trance.

 

"Nice to meet ya! I'm one of the actual cool people around here." He flashed Roxas a smile. Roxas just stared at him. "He...doesn't talk much yet, does he?" He asked.

 

You shook your head. "Yeah, it's kind of...different because I remember I was super talkative." You said. "Well, we have a few more Nobodies to meet." You turned around and started walking before your looked over your shoulder. "And it looks like you have a song to finish writing."

 

Demyx turned red and started to stutter out noises that didn't sound like words. You chuckled, then led Roxas into Zexion's room. You assumed he would meet Axel later as his other mentor, and Saix as the mission giver. You were also a little upset with Axel for dumping Roxas on you. You wondered what kind of personality was hidden under his shyness.

 

"Hello?" You asked as you walked into his room. You didn't get an answer. "Huh...must be in the library..." You created a dark corridor and led Roxas to it.

 

"And who might this be?" You heard as you stepped out. Zexion was sitting on a couch reading a small, but very thick book.

 

"Romeo and Juliet?" You snorted. "This is Roxas, Number Thirteen." You introduced the two.

 

"Let me guess, he's in shock so he hasn't spoken much?" Zexion raised an eyebrow. "And it's fine literature!"

 

"Yeah, he probably said about ten words then suddenly stopped talking." You explained.

 

"Hmm...it'll go away in time."

 

"I sure hope so." Zexion closed his book then handed it to you. You pocketed it. "Why?"

 

"Just, look through it later, please."

 

"Sure thing." You said before creating a dark corridor to the kitchen. You hoped to find the last of everyone.

 

In the kitchen was Xaldin, Lexaeus, and Vexen. Vexen was just leaving before he spotted Roxas.

 

"And who might this be?"

 

"This is Roxas, Number Thirteen."

 

"Pleasure." Lexaeus said.

 

"I look forward to working with you." Xaldin said.

 

"How delightful..." Vexen trailed off.

 

"Um...gotta go see the last Nobody now." You said.

 

You thought for a second on where he could be. The tv room? No. Outside? No. Hm... Oh right, The Hall of Empty Melodies. You created a portal and led Roxas through it.

 

"Ah!" You screamed as you shielded Roxas with a defense spell. One of Xigbar's arrows almost hit the two of you.

 

"Oh shit! Sorry, babe. I didn't know who was gonna come out of that thing!" Xigbar shouted. He got down from the ceiling by going into his portal then came up in front of you and Roxas. "I definetely don't know who this is."

 

"Number Thirteen, Roxas. He doesn't talk much."

 

"Don't be afraid kid, it wasn't you who gave me this scar..." Xigbar pretended to lift his eyepatch. You slapped his hand down.

 

"Don't show him that! You'll give him nightmares!" You exclaimed. Xigbar gave a sigh then chuckled. "He's probably exhausted now from meeting everyone, so I'm going to bring him back to rest. See you later." You created a portal and led Roxas back to his room.

 

"So how was meeting everyone?" You asked. Roxas let go of your hand and sat on his bed. He looked to the ground then finally to your face after what felt like forever.

 

"You never told me anyone's name."


	8. Chapter VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story starts to get a little more serious and encounters become a little less fangirl like OOC. I would describe it more as an OOC that isn't cringey. If it's cringe at all, please let me know. I would hate to be that type of writer.

You woke up the next morning very early. You went into the kitchen and decided to make some food for little ol’ Roxas. He must have be starving...well...Nobodies don't have to eat, but still. You decided to make him some bacon and eggs. When you were done, you created a dark corridor to his bedroom with two plates in hand.

 

Roxas was still asleep, so you set the food down on his nightstand. You gently tried to shake him awake.

 

“Hey buddy, wakey wakey eggs and bakey.” You nudged his shoulder. Soon, his eyes fluttered open. You picked up the plate and showed it to him. “I made us some breakfast.” He sat up and took the plate from you. He started to eat. You decided to eat your plate of food as well. The two of you sat in silence until you were both finished.

 

“That was really good, thank you.” He said as he set the plate down. You smiled. It's been a while since you heard his voice. The mast thing he told you was how you fucked up the entirety of yesterday.

 

“How about we meet Axel today?” You asked him, making sure to give a name.

 

“Who's...Axel?” He looked into your eyes with dependence. You were starting to see him less as a child or little brother as you got a closer look at him. You wondered what kind of personality was hidden under his confusion.

 

“Axel is your other mentor. He's more your main mentor.” You still couldn't believe he dumped Roxas on you for the week.

 

“Is that why you messed up yesterday?” If you had orange juice that morning, this would have been the time where you spit it out. Roxas did not hold back on his...observations.

 

“Okay! Time to go!” You said grabbing his hand and creating a dark corridor. You ended up in Axel's room. He was still asleep and...very naked. Not fully naked, but...very naked. All he seemed to be wearing was pants and you assumed underwear. “Shield your eyes!” You pulled Roxas into your chest to hide his eyes. His cheeks turned a slight pink and he didn't say anything. “AXEL!” You practically screamed.

 

“What? It's like 7 in the morning…” Axel rubbed his eyes then realized it was you and Roxas. He gave a sort of manly scream and grabbed his blanket and covered his chest as if he had boobs to hide from you two. “Why didn't you knock?! And why is his face in your chest?!” Axel exclaimed.

 

“Well...he's not complaining…” You trailed off. You looked down to see Roxas’ cheeks were red now and you let go of him. “Uh, sorry there.” You patted down his coat and straightened it out where it was messed up.

 

“Number Eight, The Flurry of Dancing Flames.” Axel said. He was fully clothed and approached Roxas. “I'm Axel.” He extended his hand. Roxas didn't know what to do with it. Axel tried to avoid awkwardness by making it look like he was scratching the back of his head. “Y'know, I woulda killed to be where your face was just now…”

 

“Axel! Inappropriate! And that's sexual harassment!” You yelled. You threw a poison dart in his direction. Axel ducked down. Your dart stuck to his wall and he realized it would have hit him dead in the center of his forehead.

 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Axel turned Roxas away from you. “Lesson #1, don't EVER assault another Nobody.”

 

“She assaulted me and you already.” Roxas said.

 

“Hey, I was trying to protect you! Axel was...very naked.”

 

“Got it memorized? I hope you have a photographic memory because you won't be seeing that again for a while.” Axel chuckled. “[Y/N], I know what I said yesterday, but I got Roxas for today. I'll introduce him to Saix and do the whole weapon bit today. I think you might have a mission today anyways.”

 

“You said I was cleared for the week!” You lightly punched Axel's arm. You turned to Roxas. “I hope you can learn to like me, I mean...you're gonna see a whole lotta me.” You gave him an awkward clap on the shoulder then dark corridor'ed it outta there.

 

“[Y/N].” You turned to see Saix. His cheeks turned a light pink as he used his hand to cover a cough. “You're up very early.”

 

'Oh no…’ You thought. 'I hope it doesn't get awkward between us since I read his diary. How was I supposed to know that human Saix had a secret lover that he really misses and didn't want anyone to know about?’

 

“Look, Saix.” You sighed and tried to avert your eyes from looking into his. “There's no way I can forgot what I saw in that...journal. But…” You trailed off to think of a better wording for what you were about to say. “Why do you keep pushing me away? I'm just trying to be friends with you.”

 

Saix looked very surprised. He seemed to be at a loss for words. “I...Are you certain?” A light smile arose from his lips.

 

“Of course I am, Isa.” You immediately covered your mouth. “I mean Saix! I have no idea where that came from, sorry.” Your head suddenly began to hurt. You rubbed your temples slightly.

 

“[Y/N], did you…” Saix cleared his throat. “Do you remember anything from your past life?”

 

You never really dwelled on your past life before. You didn't remember much at all. “I think I owned a synthesis shop. My top competitors were the moogles across the way. I don't know what world I came from. That's all I can really remember.”

 

“I see…” Saix put on his classic thinking face. “I was...security in training at a castle. I help to protect a lab for a few...scientists. Their studies were very confidential and had to be protected at all costs. When I was younger, I used to play around the castle with my comrade. One day we were offered the job since we were always there.”

 

“Might as well be working, right?” You asked. You were very happy that Saix was sharing this about his past with you.”

 

“Precisely.” He looked away from your eyes and out to the window wall. “I had two comrades, actually. Only one was also offered the job. The other one would sometimes make us lunch. She was happy for us.”

 

'This must've been his girlfriend.’ You thought.

 

“When did you start dating her?” You asked. Saix looked taken aback.

 

“That's very inappropriate to ask, [Y/N].” Saix looked back to your eyes again. “I never told her how I felt. We...kissed once.”

 

“How can you kiss someone and not know that the other has feelings for you?” You asked. You were trying to see how far you could push this.

 

“She went off to a specialized school to achieve her dream job. She kissed both me and our comrade.” Saix had a look of regret on his face.

 

“So you were friendzoned.” Everything fell silent. “I'm really sorry about that, Saix. Do you still miss her?”

 

“No. I have no reason to miss her.” Wow, talk about cold. “I believe you can consider me a friend now. I've told you secrets of my past life and I expect you to keep them secret.” You nodded your head. “Now, would you like to hear your mission for the day?”

 

“Sure, and thanks for telling me all of that Saix. I appreciate it.” You smiled.

 

Oh how he missed that smile. How could he still miss you, if you were right here? Was it dangerous to tell you that? Probably. But Saix wanted to protect you from any harm.

 

\-----

 

“Finally!” You shouted after defeating another heartless. You looked to Demyx to see him sitting down. “Don't tell me you finished your half a long time ago?” Dents nodded his head. “I wish I was as strong as you.”

 

“You're stronger than me.” Demyx said. He created a corridor of darkness. “Let's go back, I want to show you something.” You followed him in and came out into his room. You never realized it before, but Demyx had quite a few different types of string instruments. You saw an electric guitar, an electric bass, a classical guitar, a string bass, and a cello. You assumed his weapon, a sitar, didn't have a stand since it was his weapon that could be summoned by will.

 

“Pick an instrument, any instrument.” He said. You looked around and chose the (stringed instrument of choice). Demyx picked it up. He set himself up in front of a stand and started to play something. You clapped when he was done. “I wrote this song for you because you're very kind to me and most people here think I'm kinda useless. I don't really like to fight.”

 

“That was very nice of you.” You sat down next to him on his bed and looked at the sheet music. “Oh.” You said.

 

“What's wrong?” Demyx asked. He looked a little panicked.

 

“There's a Gsus right there. I didn't know this was a holy song.” You laughed.

 

Demyx looked at you very confused. He looked to where you pointed and studied it for a while. He then face palmed. “You made a music theory joke.” He started to chuckle a bit. “I had no idea you knew about music.” Demyx said. “That's so cool! No one else here knows anything about real music!”

 

“I...think I used to play or sing or something when I was alive. I can't really remember, but I know that I can understand looking at a piece of music like this and see things like chord progressions.” You trailed off. You wished you could remember why you knew this. (Maybe it's because the author is a music major.)

 

“So, did you like it?” He asked.

 

“Of course, it was really sad at first but it ended with happiness and positivity.” Demyx smiled. You tasseled his hair then got up. “I gotta go now. Thank you for the song.” You said.

 

“Thanks for listening.”

 

You created a dark corridor then walked out of his room. You ended up in the library.

 

“Hey Zexion?* You asked. You couldn't see if he was in here or not.

 

“Yes?” He walked out from an aisle and came towards you. You smiled.

 

“I stood up all night last night reading that book.” You said. Zexion raised his eyebrows as if he was asking you what you thought of it. “I liked your ending better.” You pulled out the book, then a piece of paper from the back of the book. “It was really stupid how they died over a misunderstanding and I like how you ending fixed that and it all worked out in the end.” Zexion took the book and paper and set it down on a nearby table.

 

“Real life can be a fairy tale. This is why Romeo and Juliet is a great piece of literature. It ends in tragedy. Most things in life don't always turn out great for everyone in the end.” He went over to a shelf and handed you another book. “Take a look at this one. It's a very short read. You could probably finish it in an hour.”

 

You took the book then sat down. “I guess I'll talk to you in an hour.” You then opened the book. It was Sleeping Beauty. It was a story of a princess who was saved by the prince who slayed the dragon and brought everyone back to life. It was copyrighted by Disney. When you were finished you stretched and called out for Zexion. He came over to you.

 

“Thoughts?”

 

“Your ending kinda bummed me out. Why did she have to die?” You asked. Zexion took the book and put it back on the shelf.

 

“In the original story, that is the real ending. You see, Aurora is a real person. In real life what you read actually happened. In a story similar to hers, she was supposed to die. She defied odds and had a happy ending despite what was written to happen.”

 

“I can meet Aurora and Prince Phillip?!” You exclaimed.

 

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but their world fell to darkness. I believe it would be almost impossible to meet Aurora. I wouldn't know what world she is on now.” Zexion sighed. “Although...I do know where one of the characters is.”

 

“Who?” You asked him. You were at the edge of your seat.

 

“Maleficent. She's sorry excuse for a villan nowadays.” Zexion scoffed. He then handed you an envelope. “This is an address and time, I'd like to have dinner with you at the end of the week.” You took the envelope and you could feel your cheeks dust with a light pink.

 

“Um, sure…” You trailed off.

 

“Excellent. I'll see you then.” Zexion walked away into an aisle of books. You created a dark corridor underneath you and fell through. You landed on your bed and sighed into your pillow.

 

Only it wasn't your bed. And that wasn't your pillow. It was Roxas’ bed and Roxas’ pillow. Just how did you know? Well you knocked Roxas over onto the ground when you landed in his bed.

 

“Ow…” Roxas whined.

 

“I'm so sorry!” You apologized.

 

“Why me?” Roxas whined again.

 

Oh, [Y/N].


	9. Chapter IX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was at this point...I think I wrote this about a week or two ago from 12/17/2018...that I decided to actually incorporate the actual Kingdom Hearts timeline to the best of my writing abilities in order to prepare this entire story to have a sequel after...y'know Chain of Memories and Sora storming The World That Never Was. The timeline is not exact, but I tried my hardest.

“Hey Xemnas, care to tell me why little ol’ Roxas looks like Ventus? Y'know, the kid who's friends with the one who did this?” Xigbar pointed to his eye.

 

“I am not aware of why their appearances are so similar.” Xemnas stated.

 

“Do we know where Aqua is down there?” Number Two questioned Number One.

 

“We currently are not aware of exactly where she is located, although we know she is still trapped.” Xigbar nodded in understanding.

 

“Where is his body?” He was referring to Ventus.

 

“I am personally attempting to locate the castle. It may hold answers as to why Thirteen's appearance resembles him.”

 

“That can't be Sora's Nobody. They'd look exactly the same. I think someone found Ventus before us and released his heart.” Xemnas held his hand up to stop Xigbar from speaking any further.

 

“Speak to no one of this. You are dismissed.” He waved his hands away.

 

Xigbar created a dark corridor and left Xemnas’ chamber. Once he was out, he scoffed. “What are you hiding from me...?”

 

\-----

 

This morning to decided to make a lot of pancakes. Why? Because yesterday Roxas finished his basic training and was not able to finally go on real missions. It was worth celebrating. And he wielded a keyblade! Apparently it was a big deal that everyone in the castle was talking about. You were very sure what a keyblade was, but you understood that it meant Roxas had the potential to become as powerful as Xemnas himself.

 

You were just about to finish up the last pancake when you created a dark corridor just big enough to stick your head into. You first stuck it into Roxas’ room to ask him to come to the kitchen. You then stuck it into Axel's room so he can get up and make sure both him and Roxas come to the kitchen. You also invited Demyx just for the hell of it.

 

Lately Demyx had been...well, worshipping you. He would brought you something back from every mission he went on this week. Larxene teased you that he was starting to feel love for you. You brushed it off as you still didn't believe in the emotion of love. You hadn't felt it since you became a Nobody, and sure, it was one of those strong emotions that you should be able to feel, but you just hadn't experienced it. Yet.

 

In a few minutes you had a plate stacked with pancakes and put it on the table. You set some syrup next to it and some plates out. You put a few extras in case anyone came by and wanted some. You turned around to start making bacon when you decided you should also invite Larxene. She was the only other girl here and because of that she was sort of your best female friend.

 

Just as you set out a plate filled with bacon Axel and Roxas came in.

 

“[Y/N]! I didn't think of using a dark corridor like that. It was so cool!” Roxas said as he sat down.

 

Axel took a seat next to him and rolled his eyes. “It wasn't THAT cool. Hasn't Xigbar been doing that for like years?”

 

“Talking shit in here?” Xigbar walked into the kitchen and smirked. He took a chair and spun it around so he was sitting backwards in it. “Breakfast for me? You're so sweet.” He started to serve himself.

 

“Hey, don't hog it all!” Axel said. He started to put food on to his and Roxas’ plates. You sighed and turned back to the stove. You decided to make more pancakes and bacon if they were going to act like this.

 

Just as you set out more food Demyx walked in. “Good morning, [Y/N]!” Denyx went in for a hug which you awkwardly returned. “Cute apron.” He said. You looked down and realized that this entire time you've been wearing a frilly black and white apron with the Nobody insignia on it.

 

“It is a cute apron.” Axel agreed.

 

“I think it could use some little more frills.” Xigbar looked you up and down.

 

“L-leave me alone guys.” You turned around and started to clean up your mess in order to hide the light dust of pink on your cheeks.

 

Some others came in as you finished cleaning up and started to make themselves coffee or cereal. They would leave the second they saw Axel and Xigbar constantly fighting. Roxas and Demyx were having what seemed like a very interesting conversation when you sat down. You finally started to serve yourself when Larxene came in.

 

“I have arrived, you can all bow now.” Larxene stated. You laughed as she sat down next to you. “It looks really good, [Y/N].” She started to serve food on to her plate.

 

“Why is she here?” Demyx complained. Larxene scoffed.

 

“She's my friend, Demyx.” His demeanor suddenly changed.

 

“How are you this fine morning, Larxene?” Demyx asked, getting out of his seat to bow.

 

Larxene giggled then whispered to you. “You should make guys fall in love with you more often.” You rolled your eyes.

 

“He's just trying to be nice because I'm your mutual friend.” Larxene raised an eyebrow at you.

 

“Sure…”

 

“Anyways, I made all of this today to celebrate Roxas and his first real mission that's going to happen…”

 

“Next week.” Saix said as he walked in and poured himself a coffee. He sat down across from you. “May I?” He was asking if he could have the remainder of the food.

 

“Of course, anything for you.” He then started to scrape the rest of the pancakes and bacon on to his plate.

 

“You have Saix around your little finger too?” Larxene whispered. You lightly punched her arm.

 

“[Y/N], this is very excellent. It reminds me of my days alive.” Saix smiled. (More like he hasn't had your cooking in years.)

 

“Whoa there, Isa.” Axel smirked.

 

“I haven't heard that name in years!” Xigbar exclaimed.

 

“Who's Isa?” Demyx and Roxas said in unison.

 

“It's Saix, please respect my past and don't talk about it.” Saix sternly said.

 

“I think it was his Somebody name.” You whispered to Demyx and Roxas. They nodded and looked to their empty plates. The room fell silent as Roxas and Demyx took their plates to the sink then sat back down.

 

Larxene finished her food then gave you a smirk. “Look, your entire harem is almost all here.” You raised an eyebrow.

 

“My entire what?!” You whispered shouted.

 

“You're clueless.” She shook her head and laughed. “It's missing Zexion.”

 

“I do not have a harem with Axel, Saix, Xigbar, Demyx, Roxas, and Zexion.” You whispered in her ear.

 

“Not yet.” She said before getting up to leave. “See you after your date, [Y/N]!” Larxene shouted before exiting the kitchen.

 

“Date?” Axel and Demyx said in unison.

 

“It's not really a date…” You trailed off.

 

“Then what is it?” Xigbar laughed. “You friendzoned whoever it is?”

 

“Zexion invited me to this place in town a block away from Memory's Skyscraper. I figured it was nothing more than a friendly outing.” You explained.

 

“A 'friendly outing’?” Xigbar started laughing hysterically. “That restaurant isn't for 'friendly outings’ toots!” He started to slap him hand on the table as if he were a seal.

 

“He beat me to it…” Demyx muttered and crossed his arms.

 

“I thought you said you were her boyfriend, Axel.” Roxas said matter of factly.

 

“What?!” You started laughing to try and cover your blush that was arising. “I don't have a boyfriend.”

 

“Haha, kids say the darnest things right, [Y/N]?” Axel scratched the back of his head.

 

“Roxas isn't a kid, he's like sixteen!” You said.

 

“How old are you?” Xigbar asked.

 

“I...don't remember?” You questioned. “How old are you?”

 

“Uh…don't you have a date to worry about?” Xigbar questioned. Saix got up from the table and left.

 

“It's not a date!” You exclaimed. You stormed out of the kitchen and created a dark corridor to your personal bathroom. You splashed water on your face since it was red as a tomato. ‘Great...I wonder what today's mission is...and with who?’ You thought.

 

\-----

 

When your mission with Xaldin was over you headed over to the address that Zexion gave you. You decided to walk since you never get to see much of The World That Never Was as often as you wished. You walked past Memory's Skyscraper and stopped in front of it. Something felt...weird.

 

_“I can't see you as much anymore so, here.” You grabbed the locket from a man whose face you couldn't make out._

__

__

 

It was a silver locket. One side had a picture of what you assumed was him, but it was just so blurry that you couldn't tell. The other side was a picture of another man. You also couldn't tell who it was because it was so blurry.

 

“Aw! Now I'll never forget both of my best friends!” You hugged the man and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I guess this is goodbye, huh?”

 

_“I'm afraid it is. I hope your new shop will continue to prosper. Goodbye, [Y/N].” He started to walk away then turned back for a second. “Please don't forget about us...about me.” You nodded and waved goodbye as he walked out of your shop and out into the world._

 

“Whoa…” You said as you grabbed your head. “Who…?” You asked out loud. You couldn't see any faces in your flashback, only bodies. You wondered who you were talking to, and who were the two men in that locket.

 

Your locket! You wondered where it was. You started to walk towards the restaurant where Zexion was waiting as you hatched a plan for yourself.

 

You were going to try and remember what world you came from so that you could visit your old shop and find your locket.

 

\-----

 

“There you are, [Y/N]! I was beginning to get worried.” Zexion stated. You sat down across from him. You looked around the restaurant to see that there were no employees.

 

“How does this place work?” You asked.

 

“The food is cooked by our own personal Nobodies. You just summon one or a few and tell then what you want, and they should be able to go to the kitchen and do so. This building is enchanted for them to do so.” He explained.

 

“That's so cool!” You exclaimed. You snapped your fingers and summoned four samurai Nobodies. “I want…(favorite food)!” Zexion chuckled. He summoned his own Nobodies and ordered his food.

 

“I thought this was supposed to be a super fancy place.” You said, a little relieved that this wasn't a date.

 

“And just who told you that?” Zexion raised an eyebrow.

 

“Xigbar kind of implied it.”

 

“I figured you didn't know about this place. There's a fancier restaurant a few buildings down, but I thought this place to be more appropriate for our first time doing something together as friends.” You tried to hold back a sigh when Zexion said that. You were so glad that this was his way of establishing your friendship.

 

“We're friends now, Zexion?” You raised an eyebrow.

 

“Well doing this would be awkward if we weren't.” Zexion sipped from a coffee mug that one of his Nobodies brought to him. One of your samurai brought you back a glass of water. You started to drink it.

 

“How come some of us like to eat when we don't really have to?” You asked Zexion.

 

“I predict that it gives us memories of when we were alive. It a good feeling.” You nodded as Zexion's explanation. Soon both of your Nobodies brought back your food. They looked to the both of you as if asking if there was anything else. You shook your head and dismissed then with a snap. Zexion also dismissed his. The two of you ate your food while Zexion told you about certain books he read as a Somebody and books he reads now. He explained that his taste in literature had changed when he became a Nobody.

 

“I okay had one friend when I was a younger Somebody. She was about the same age as me. Sometimes she would make me lunch on the days I actually was home. I spent most of my time studying with my mentors away from home, up the hill. She was my neighbor.” You were very intrigued by Zexion's story.

 

“I wish I remembered more about my Somebody days.” Zexion's eyes lit up, eager to know what you had to say. “I remember that I owner a synthesis shop. I also…” You trailed off. “I remember a moment where a friend of mine said that he couldn't see me anymore for a while. He didn't want me to forget him it our other friend so he gave me a locket with both of their pictures in it. The thing is... I don't remember their faces or what world I came from.” Zexion looked down to his empty plate and nodded.

 

He started talking to you about novels where the main character has amnesia. After a while the two of you decided to head back to the castle. Zexion created a dark corridor.

 

“I'm gonna take the long way.” You said.

 

Zexion shrugged. “Suit yourself.” And he left. You started to walk back. You soon found yourself in front of Memory's Skyscraper yet again. You started at it, hoping for another vision to happen. You soon grew impatient then started to walk away.

 

_“My name is Ventus.” You took his and and shook it._

__

__

 

“I'm [Y/N].” You two let go of each other's hands. “I see you beat up one of my best friends.” You look behind him to see someone on the ground, you couldn't make out his face. Your other friend was tending to his injuries, which were very light. You also couldn't see his face.

 

“If you don't mind helping me out here…” Ventus gained your attention again. This time you got a look at his face. The only thing you could focus on was his blue eyes. Everything else was a blue except for his eyes. “What world is this?”

 

_“Welcome to Radiant Garden, Ventus!”_

 

“Radiant Garden!”


	10. Chapter X

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, sometimes things are supposed to be italicized but they aren't. I'll go back to fix this later, I promise.

“Hey Larxene, do you know where Radiant Garden is?” You asked.

 

“Radiant Garden? Never heard of it.” Larxene looked to your pouting face and then felt bad. “If it's that important to you, you should probably ask one of the smart older guys like Luxord or Xaldin or something. They know more about worlds that I do.”

 

“Thanks, Larxene.”

 

\-----

 

“Hey Lexaeus can I ask you something?” You asked.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Do you know where is Radiant Garden is?” His eyes lit up.

 

“I haven't heard of that world in a long time. That's my homeworld.” He looked off into the distance.

 

“Really? It's mine too!” You exclaimed. Lexaeus furrowed his brow.

 

“It's no longer called Radiant Garden. It's known as something very ugly sounding: Hallow Bastion. It used to be such a beautiful world.”

 

“Thank you so much Lexaeus!”

 

\-----

 

“Hallow Bastion…” You thought. You created a dark corridor. “Here goes…”

 

You stepped through and came out to a tiny plaza. You saw some construction junk here and there's and a couple of shitty looking shops. ‘I wonder we're mine is…’ You thought. It was probably super run down by now.

 

You walked around until you stopped in front of a Moogle shop. ‘I completed with this shop. Mine must be nearby.’

 

“[Y/N]! Where have you been, kupo?” One of the Moogles approached you.

 

“It's...been a long few…”

 

“It's been six months, kupo.” You raised your eyebrows to the Moogle.

 

“My shop needs me!” You shouted before taking off. You remembered where it was. Finally there you were standing in front of it. You went inside.

 

There were cobwebs all over the place and probably a rats nest for all you knew. You held your hand over your mouth to try and stop yourself from sneezing. You saw many old materials and a few things were fallen over. You hoped that no one had stolen or vandalized anything. You went to your room. You went into your nightstand, hoping to find the locket. No locket. You then went over to a tiny wooden box. You opened it to see many pieces or jewelry and...no locket. You sighed. You had no idea where else it could be. You went over to your old dusty bed and sat down.

 

You felt something underneath you.

 

“I'm sitting on it, aren't I?” You picked up the locked and stared at it for a while.

 

You weren't ready to open it yet. You decided to head back to the castle, you still had a mission to do for the day. You put the locket around your neck and tucked it under your coat. You created a dark corridor.

 

\-----

 

“I hate sand.” You said as you finally defeated the last heartless.

 

“Me too.” Roxas said as he collected munny off of the ground.

 

“Ready to RTC?” You asked him.

 

“Hey Axel told you what that means?” He asked. You nodded. Roxas looked like he was thinking. “I have a better idea.” He tried his best to create a dark corridor and you followed him into it.

 

You came out in front of an ice cream place. Roxas went up the shop owner and bought three. You then followed him as he led you to the top of a clock tower. He finally handed you an ice cream when you sat down.

 

“Nice little place you found here.” You said, sitting next to him with your ice cream. The two of you dangled your feet over the ledge. You were honestly a little nervous about the whole thing.

 

“Yeah, Axel showed me it. He should be here soon.” As if on cue, Axel sat down next to you. Roxas handed him an ice cream.

 

“So we're inviting her to our club now?” Axel asked Roxas.

 

“Yep, I like her.” He bit a piece of his ice cream. 

 

“Aww, thanks Roxas.” You and Axel laughed. You thought back to your locket. “Hey guys, so I found this cool today.” You took your locket off of your neck and held it.

 

“You found your heart?” Axel snorted. You lightly pushed his shoulder.

 

“No, it's my old locket. I...found it today.” You said. Let's look at what's inside together!” You then opened the locket, but kept your other hand over it. You didn't look down. You were very nervous, you didn't know why either.

 

“Come on, [Y/N]! You're leaving us in suspense here!” You nervously chuckled.

 

“Okay, I'll move my hand, but I'm not looking until I count to three in my head.”

 

“Aww no fun, I'm going to feel like I’m cheating if I see it before you.” Axel said.

 

“Too bad!” You the closed your eyes and took your hand off of the locket. You began to count in your head but couldn't get past one before you heard gasps from both Roxas and Axel. You open your eyes and looked down.

 

The boy on the left was Saix and the boy on the right was Axel.

 

“I...what?” You said. “How?” You looked at Axel's expression. His jaw was dropped. “I don't get it…” You trailed off. “My friend gave this to me as a way to remember my best friends...who are supposed to be the two in this locket.”

 

“[Y/N].” You looked to Axel. He held the locket to his face. “This guy doesn't have triangles under his eyes...and his hair isn't as long as mine. Also, Saix has different colored eyes than that.” Little did you know, Axel's other hand had his fingers crossed behind his back.

 

“But...I got this a few years ago...hair grows.”

 

“And eyes change color and markings?” Axel raised an eyebrow then gave you back your locket. “It's just a coincidence, [Y/N].”

 

“Yeah...sure...a coincidence.”

 

\-----

 

You stayed at the clock tower for a while longer after Axel and Roxas left. You needed answers. You created a dark corridor.

 

“What does this mean?” You asked Memory's Skyscraper. You sighed. You had no idea why you expected it to talk back to you. You walked closer to it.

 

_“[Y/N], I'm moving out.” A boy said_

__

__

 

“We aren't going to be neighbors anymore?” You whined. You were younger in this flashback.

 

“I'm sorry. I heard Moogles can do deliveries if you also give them some of the goods.”

 

“Alright! I'll make two lunches then. One for the Moogle and one for you!” You hugged your friend. He hugged you back.

 

“I'm really going to miss you.”

 

“Me too, [Y/N].” Your friend let go then gave you something. It was a bracelet. “I had a Moogle put our names and friends forever on it.” You looked at the initials. It indeed had your name on it along with his.

 

_“Thanks, Ienzo.”_

 

“Ienzo?” You said out loud. “What about the locket?”

 

“[Y/N].”

 

You turned around. “Oh, Saix!” You said. Then it hit you. “How come I'm the only one without an X in my name?”

 

“We add an X to our Somebody name to create our Nobody name. You were never given one because you are Number Zero.” Saix put a hand on your shoulder. “Are you...okay?” He asked.

 

“I'm fine, I just had this weird flashback about making two lunches. One for the delivery Moogle and the other for my friend. I was really young, probably fifteen or sixteen years old.”

 

“I see.” Saix sighed. “Let's go home.” He created a dark corridor and left you through it.

 

\-----

 

“Hey Demyx?” You asked. The two of you were in his room. He was randomly strumming chords on his sitar as you read a book. In it, the main character had lost his memory.

 

“Yeah?” Asked Demyx. He stopped strumming.

 

“What's everyone's Somebody names?” You asked.

 

Demyx chuckled. “Well yours is [Y/N]. Mine is Myde. Larxene is Arlene. Xigbar is Braig. Xaldin is Dilan. Lexaeus is Aeleus. Saix is Isa. Axel is Lea. I'm not sure about Luxord or Marluxia. The Superior of Ansem. Roxas is Sora. Um...oh yeah! Zexion is Ienzo.”

 

“Wait what?”

 

Demyx began to go down the list again.

 

“Nonono, wait. I meant is that really Zexion's real name?” You thought back to your flashback. Your friend's name was Ienzo. If Zexion was your old friend...then maybe he could tell you about the two boys in your locket.

 

“Yeah, it's Ienzo, I'm pretty sure.” Demyx began to strum his sitar again.

 

“I have to go.”

 

\-----

 

“Zexion?” You said, trying to look down the aisles. “Zexion!”

 

“Yes, [Y/N], I'm right here.” Zexion came out from an aisle. You ran up to him and hugged him. “Excuse me?” He exclaimed.

 

“Ienzo!” You started to cry on his shoulder. Zexion slowly started to wrap his arms around you, returning the hug.

 

“[Y/N]? Do you... remember me?” He asked.

 

You let go of him and wiped your tears away. “We were friends. Then I couldn't see you after you moved in with your mentors. I would send you lunch via delivery Moogle!” You gasped. “I knew you since I was super small! We bathed together as toddlers!”

 

Zexion covered his cheeks with one of his hands. He was obviously embarrassed. “I...I'm happy that you remember me but...why did you have to remember that?” You hugged him again.

 

“I'm so glad to finally have someone who knew me as a Somebody.” Zexion slightly pushed you away.

 

“How did you remember?”

 

“Memory's Skyscraper. The bracelet, which I'm sorry, I'm not sure where it's at or if I still have it at my old shop.” Zexion nodded.

 

“At some point you stopped sending me lunches.” He said. You looked a little sad.

 

“Oh! I'm sorry, I started making lunches for…” You brought out your locket. You showed Zexion. “These are my other friends. I don't remember their names, but I remember making them lunch after the delivery Moogle got tired of sending you my lunches.

 

“[Y/N].” Zexion said.

 

“Yes?”

 

“You knew Saix and Axel when you were all Somebodies?” Zexion asked.

 

“Oh no. These guys have shorter hair. The red head doesn't have Axel's eye tattoos and the blue head doesn't have the same color eyes as Saix.” You explained.

 

Zexion made his thinking face. “[Y/N]. Saix and Axel...or should I say Isa and Lea became guards for the castle that my mentors researched in. I knew them when I was a Somebody.”

 

“Wait what?” You asked.

 

“Your Somebody friends, Isa and Lea...are Saix and Axel.”


	11. Chapter XI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No notes for this chapter. Enjoy.

ButterflyXMoonlight

You were at a loss for what you should do knowing that Axel and Saix were your best friends. Would it ruin your friendships now if you let them know that you're starting to remember?

 

You looked up at the ceiling while laying on your bed. It was so blank. You were then distracted by a small light emitting from your bathroom. You liked to leave it on to help with how dark your room would get with no window.

 

You felt really empty.

 

A single tear rolled down your face as you forgot to blink.

 

"What if I just faded away right now?" You asked yourself outloud. You sat up and wiped your tear away.

 

_"That looks delicious. Did ya make it yourself?" You looked up from your lunch to see a boy with short spikey red hair looking down at you. He had emerald green eyes, almost too bright to look real. He wore mostly colors of orange and yellow._

__

__

 

"I did actually." You admitted. You picked up a piece of your lunch and held it out to him. "Want to try it? Don't worry, my hands are clean." You smiled.

 

"Whoa, really? Sure!" He took the food out from between your fingers and put it in his mouth.

 

"Lea! What are you doing?" You looked a little bit behind the red haired boy to see someone with a different type of spikey hairdo and blue hair. His eyes were a bit of a bluer shade than the boy in front of you. His name must be Lea according to the blue haired boy.

 

"What? She offered me!" Lea complained to his friend. "And it's SO good!"

 

"He's not lying. You can try some too if you want." You picked up another piece of food and held it towards the other boy.

 

"Well, I guess if you're offering." He took it from your fingers and popped it in his mouth. "This...is really good."

 

"See, I told you." Lea added.

 

"What's your name?" The blue haired boy asked. "My name is Isa." He extended a hand for you to shake.

 

"I'm [Y/N]." You shook his hand and smiled. You felt a weird feeling in your chest.

 

"And I'm Lea!" Lea butted in and extended his hand for a handshake. You shook his hand.

 

"If you're hungry, we can walk to my house down the street and I can give you some more." You offered. Isa and Lea looked to each other and nodded.

 

_"Sure!"_

 

"Whoa..." You said as you held your head. You didn't expect to randomly remember something without the help of Memory's Skyscraper. You crossed your arms. "So that's how we met..." You said outloud.

 

You tried your best to summarize the memory back to yourself. You didn't want to forget it again. You also still didn't know if you should tell...Isa and Lea that you remember. You sighed and ran a hand through your hair.

 

"Oh..." You whispered as your remember's Saix's diary and story from the other day. You had kissed him and Axel on the cheek before. Saix used to love you.

 

'I wonder if he still does...' You thought to yourself.

 

You then had an idea.

 

\-----

 

"So I'm supposed to distract Saix?" Roxas questioned you. He scratched his head. "And how am I supposed to do that?"

 

"I don't know!" You exclaimed. "Ask him questions about the Superior or the Organization or something." You felt like that was a good idea.

 

"Um...okay sure." Roxas went into Saix's portal door.

 

You hurried back to your portal door and made a barrier behind you. You then made a dark corridor just big enough for your upper body. You imagined it to be in front of Saix's nightstand where you hoped his diary would be.

 

"...so then I wondered who was the Superior before he became a Nobody." You heard Roxas say. You could tell that he was trying his hardest not to stare at you as he had Saix just where you guys wanted him, with his back facing you.

 

"Well he was a brilliant scientist..." Saix began to explain.

 

You slowly opened the drawer and looked inside. You didn't see the diary. You moved some drawer junk around and found a picture frame with the picture facing the open/close panel. You could just see the white of the back of the picture. You took it then went back into your dark corridor.

 

You quickly opened up the picture frame then took the picture out. It was a picture of just Isa and Lea.

 

'He still has a soft spot for him.' You thought. You stared at the picture for a while until you heard knocking at the barrier you made.

 

"Oh, Roxas!" You exclaimed as you made the barrier vanish.

 

"That was the weirdest thing ever." Roxas said. "You're lucky that I like you." Roxas sat down next to you on your bed.

 

"Well, I have another favor to ask..."

 

\-----

 

"So I was wondering...what kind of person were you before you were a Nobody, Axel? Just how cool were you?" Roxas asked.

 

"Were?! Buddy, let me tell you..." Axel began to gloat about his old self.

 

You slowly opened the drawer and immediately saw what looked like another diary. You took it then went back into your corridor. You sat on your bed again next to the picture frame and stared at the cover of the diary. It looked pretty thick for one. You opened the cover and a few papers fell out. Taped to the pages were various pictures of you, Isa, and/or Lea either together or separate. You then saw another picture of you with someone who looked like Roxas. You stared at his eyes for a very long time.

 

"Ventus?" You asked yourself outloud. You flipped the pages and a few more notes fell out. With each picture, you started to remember more and more. At the end of the book was a picture of the three of you a little bit older. It was a few months before you never saw them again. They suddenly stopped contacting you and the perimeter surrounding the castle became larger. You remembered that you had no way to go in due to other guards that weren't Isa or Lea.

 

You picked up the notes off of the floor. You counted ten.

 

Note 1: _I heard you like kimchi, so here you go Lea! (smiley face)_

 

Note 2: _I saw a flower that looked like this today. (picture of red flower) It kind of reminded me of your hair. (laughing face)_

 

Note 3: _Isa told me that it was your birthday, so here's a coupon for the weapon shop. I hope you can finally get what you've been wanting. (drawing of Lea's weapon)_

 

Note 4: _I haven't seen you all week so I just wanted to let you know that I miss you._

 

Note 5: _Isa told me that you had a crush on a girl. Do I know her? This is so embarrassing to ask..._

 

Note 6: _Whenever you're free today stop by my house! I have your Christmas present and I'd like to walk around town to look at the decorations and lights! (tiny picture of Santa on his sleigh with reindeer)_

 

Note 7: _I just realized that you never told me who you liked. I guess it's not that important anyways. Anyways, I found a stray dog the other day. I was wondering if you knew what we could feed it?_

 

Note 8: _Do you think Ventus will ever come back? He was pretty cool, wasn't he?_

 

Note 9: _I hope that you can visit me soon the next time you have a day off._

 

Note 10: _I'm going to synthesis school soon! Please come see me before I leave!_

 

You started to put everything back then you shoved the scrapbook and the picture frame in your nightstand drawer. Just as you were closing the drawer, Roxas walked in.

 

"He went on forever!" Roxas complained. "Did you get what you were looking for?"

 

"Yeah...sorta." You walked over to Roxas and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks for your help."

 

"Uh, sure! A-anytime!" Roxas blushed then turned around. "B-bye [Y/N]! Tee sou yomorrow! ...I mean see you tomorrow!"

 

You decided to not tell Axel and Saix that you remembered. You were afraid to ruin the relationships you had now.


	12. Chapter XII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Must fight the urge of losing creativity...

You were disappointed that you couldn't find anything about your past with Saix, but you at least found out a little more about Axel. You wondered if you ever sent notes to Saix and if he still kept them as well.

 

Last night you didn't get a lot of sleep. Do Nobodies even need sleep anyways? You weren't sure, but you felt the need to drink coffee as you would when you were a Somebody. You went into the kitchen and poured yourself a cup and prepared it the way you liked. You sat down and took in the aroma of the coffee. You also remembered that Nobodies don't really have to eat either.

 

"Feels like I never see you go on any more missions." You looked up to see Xigbar sitting down in a chair near you. He also had a cup of coffee in front of him.

 

"It really feels that way." You stared into your cup and gently set it down in front of you. "Who were you as a Somebody?"

 

Xigbar raised an eyebrow at you. He must have not expected that question from you. He reached behind his head and lifted up his eyepatch. He set it on the table next to his mug. You didn't look up at his uncovered eye. "You can look when you want to." He said. He cleared his throat. You continued to look down at your coffee. "I worked for some scientists back in Radiant Garden-"

 

He was interrupted by a gasp. You covered your mouth and looked up to him. You then allowed yourself to look at his other eye. He had a scar and you knew there was no way he could see out of the eye. Xigbar looked a tiny bit sad.

 

"Are you alright?" He asked.

 

You shook your head yes. "It's just...I'm from Radiant Garden."

 

"Small world." He smirked. "Anyways, I worked for these scientists. They hired me as a guard, but I was special. I didn't have tasks like Xaldin or Lexaeus did." He took his eyepatch and put it back on. "I was a hitman. That's how I got this."

 

"You killed people?"

 

"Not really. I only ever had to make sure they never tried to mess with the castle again." He chuckled.

 

"So you weren't really a hitman unless you killed people." You said.

 

"You're a smart cookie, aren't you?" He ruffled your hair. "Look." He leaned closer to you and began to speak in a whisper. "The girl who did this to me...she had a friend. He had spikey blonde hair and blue eyes. Ring any bells?"

 

"Demyx?" You questioned.

 

"No!" He looked around before whispering into your ear. "Roxas looks exactly like the kid. His name was Ventus."

 

"And he was friends with the girl who...killed you?" You asked.

 

"In a way, yes. Her name was Aqua." Her name didn't ring any bells.

 

"I met Ventus once. I don't think he looked like Roxas. Then again...all I can remember are his eyes." You admitted.

 

"Look, I've taken quite the liking to you. I just want you to keep your eyes peeled. There's something fishy going on around here." He finished his coffee then got up.

 

"Wait!" Xigbar turned around and gave you a questionable look. You had about five seconds to decide whether or not you wanted to tell him about your past.

 

"I...I ran a synthesis shop." Xigbar sat back down next to you.

 

"It's my turn for story time now?" He chuckled.

 

You didn't know why, but you felt that you could trust Xigbar given that he just told you something he's probably never even told anyone.

 

"My neighbor was Zexion." It was the first time you had told this to anyone else. "But he moved away to the castle after a while."

 

"You're making me feel really old now." He scratched the back of his head.

 

"I was also friends with Saix and Axel...but they kinda think that I forgot." Xigbar started to rub your back. "Hey, it's not like I'm gonna cry or anything."

 

"It's just a comforting hand." He said as he took his hand away. "So you were so close this entire time, and I never knew about you."

 

"I guess so. I never knew you worked at the castle." It then dawned on you. "Just how many members worked in the castle?"

 

"One through eight, sweetie." Xigbar tassled your hair again. "We were all close by and you never knew. That's probably why you turned into a Nobody."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

Xigbar smirked and started to walk away. "Frankly my dear, I can talk to you again sometime if I leave you hanging."

 

He left.

 

\-----

 

"Ugh, I don't know what to do anymore." You rubbed your temples and slouched yourself over into a bad sitting posture.

 

"Are you finally going to tell me why you've been sulking on my bed ever since you came back from your mission?" Demyx asked. "You're making me worried about you."

 

You took your hands away from your temples and pouted. "It's really complicated Demyx."

 

"Can't you tell me anything?" He asked, tilting his head.

 

"What world did you come from, Demyx?"

 

"Well it's not Radiant Garden like almost everyone else in this Organization." He crossed his arms. "I don't really want to talk about home."

 

"I'm from Radiant Garden." You admitted.

 

"What?! But I thought they picked you up from Hollow Bastion?" He exclaimed.

 

"It's the same world." You smiled. "It's a beautiful world turned ugly." You gave a nervous laugh.

 

"Wait, did you know everyone else from there?"

 

"Sorta...not everyone. I've barely started to remember." Demyx started to pout. He must have felt left out since he wasn't apart of the majority from Radiant Garden. "I remember Zexion, Saix, and Axel. I never really saw anyone else. I stayed in town because I was friends with those three."

 

"They've changed a lot, I bet." Demyx looked to the floor.

 

"Not really, they're pretty much the same around me. Axel is outgoing, flirtatious, and funny. Zexion is appreciative, someone to look up to, and sweet. Saix is still the sweetest...Nobody, that I've ever met."

 

Demyx started to choke. You weren't sure on what. Maybe his own spit. "Saix? Sweet?" He questioned you. "That makes no sense. He's so emotionless. So...so rude and totally not understanding. He doesn't have any sweet qualities."

 

"He's been nice to me ever since I got here. He didn't get mad at me when I looked through his diary."

 

"His diary? Who is this Saix and how come I've never seen this side of him?!"

 

"Um..." You thought back to his diary and what he had told you about his past before. "I think he was in love with me or something when we were Somebodies." You said.

 

"Oh no!" Demyx slouched in his chair and threw his wrist over his forehead in despair. "Everyone has strong feelings for you and a past." You raised an eyebrow. "You're more dense than me!" He shouted.

 

"Sorry? I'm not sure what you're getting at here." You tilted your head in confusion.

 

"No, I'm sorry for shouting at you." Demyx created a dark corridor just under his feet. "You see the thing is...I like you."

 

You were speechless.

 

"I'm going to go disappear in embarrassment now." Demyx said before hopping down into his dark corridor.

 

"Wait!" But he was already gone. "So he likes me?" You got up and created a dark corridor that lead to your room. You walked through and sat on your bed.

 

"Wait...like-like...as in love?"


	13. Chapter XIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should add a trigger warning due to the violent behavior coming up from a certain character so...
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: I think...it's domestic abuse??? I mean no one is physically harmed except for a wall. The reader is a little bit emotionally triggered. No bad words are thrown, just a super overly dramatic scene that may or may not need editing.

"Wait, so you're telling me there's been a new member for two weeks now and I've never met her?!" You shouted at Axel.

 

"Well we waited for you during her introduction meeting, and you never showed up. Boss man didn't want to wait for you, so we went ahead." Axel said with a smirk.

 

"So what was her name again?" You asked. You stood back with Axel as you watched her awkwardly stand near a couch.

 

"Xion. She still doesn't talk." Axel said.

 

"And it's been two weeks?" You started to walk towards her. "Hey, I'm [Y/N]." You said once you were in front of her. You couldn't tell if she was looking at you because her hood was on. "Okay...well, I'll see you around sometime." You walked back to Axel to see him holding in a laugh. "Get lost." You scoffed.

 

He began to let his laugh out. You rolled your eyes. You then spotted Demyx walk into the room. He sat down on the couch and looked up. At the sight of you he got up and ran away.

 

"What's that about?" Axel asked.

 

"Uh...he kinda confessed his love to me the other day." You scratched the back of your head.

 

"Really now?" Axel smirked and nudged you with his elbow. You rolled your eyes. "Kidding, kidding. Anyways, [Y/N]..." Axel trailed off. He gestured for the two of you to sit on the couch. You followed him and sat at the end far from him.

 

"Oh no...don't tell me you're going to confess your love too." You said.

 

Axel gave a chuckle. "Not exactly, no." He cross his arms and sighed. "I'm going away for a while in the next few days."

 

Your eyes widened in shock. "Where? Why?"

 

"Castle Oblivion. A few others and I have some special jobs to do there." You've never heard of the place before. "You look worried." His eyes softened.

 

"That's because I am." A single tear fell from one of your eyes. You quickly wiped it away.

 

"Hey, hey, no need for the water works. I'm a big boy, I can take care of myself." He gave you a smile and a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "I'm pretty sure I'm the only one you're gonna miss."

 

"Wait, you said there were others. Who?" You asked.

 

'Please not Ienzo.'

 

"Marluxia, Larxene, Zexion, Lexaeus, Vexen. And that should be it."

 

'There it is...'

 

"Axel, I'll really miss you, but I remembered I have somewhere I have to go." You came closer to Axel and gave him a hug that he felt was too quick.

 

"Wait, [Y/N]." Axel shouted as you started to leave the room.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"On your way out, can you give me back my scrapbook?" You could feel your face heat up.

 

"Oh, um, yeah, sure." You stammered before completely bolting out of the room.

 

\-----

 

"Zexion?!" You shouted as soon as you got to the library.

 

"Must you yell?" Zexion said as he emerged from an aisle. You immediately ran to hug him. "[Y/N]? What's going on?" He asked.

 

"I lost you, and then I just got you back. Now...you're going to leave me again. You're my only friend from my past that I can still talk to." You spoke into his shoulder which made your voice slightly muffled.

 

"It shouldn't be for long." Zexion awkwardly kissed your forehead. You could feel your face burning up for the second time that day. "Although...I believe Xemnas has suspected a few traitors within the Organization. I think this special mission is a way for him to find out who they is, and eliminate them."

 

You looked up to Zexion. "They think you're a traitor?" Your eyes widened in disbelief.

 

"Don't worry, I assure you that it's not me." He let go of you. "Besides, if anything happens and I don't return..." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He handed it to you. "You will most likely find me here. Do not speak of this to anyone."

 

You nodded and put the paper in your pocket. "How will I know?" You asked.

 

"I think you will be able to figure it out." Zexion gave a weak smile. The two of you shared another hug for what felt like eternity.

 

"Goodbye, Ienzo."

 

\-----

 

"Axel, I have a message from Lord Xemnas." Saix said we he passed Axel in a hallway. The two stopped walking, but did not face each other. "Among the members assigned to Castle Oblivion, there are traitors. Find them, and dispose of them."

 

Axel turned to Saix. "I trust, that really came from Lord Xemnas himself." Axel turned back away from Saix. "Take care of her, she's starting to remember." Axel then walked away, leaving Saix alone in the hall.

 

'[Y/N]...just what do you remember?'

 

\-----

 

You walked to your mission log of the day. Or, should you say Saix. "What do you have for me today?" You asked with a smile.

 

Saix avoided eye contact with you. "Your mission is with me today." Saix then posted a paper with everyone's mission for the day on one of the very large glass walls. "Come, we must depart now." Saix created a dark corridor and walked in. You slowly followed.

 

'Why is he acting like the Saix everyone else is used to?'

 

The dark corridor led to someplace familiar. It was your house in Radiant Garden. You were in your living room which was just a door to the right from your shop area.

 

"Saix?" You questioned him. You felt slightly scared.

 

'Did Axel tell him how he found out?'

 

Saix was facing away from you. "[Y/N]...what do you remember?" He asked. He still wouldn't turn to look at you.

 

"I..." Your voice became stuck in your throat. An awkward silence fell over the room for a short while.

 

"What do you remember?" He asked again, this time you could see him balling his fists. Slowly, tears started to fall from your eyes as you couldn't find the words to speak.

 

"Isa-"

 

"Why didn't you tell me?!" Saix shouted and punched your wall, creating a hole in the drywall. You let a few sobs escape from your mouth. Saix turned and sank to the floor in front of your feet. "Did you know how hard it was to see you again?"

 

A few moments passed and you wiped your tears away. Saix reached for one of your hands to hold with both of his.

 

"I couldn't bare to look at you." You then realized that Saix...Isa was crying. "I didn't want you to suffer the same fate as me."

 

"Isa...I'm sorry." The room was silent besides Saix's light sobbing. "It was just recently that I found out."

 

"I'm sorry for yelling, [Y/N]." Saix let go of your hand but stayed on his knees on your floor.

 

"It's okay, Isa." You crouched down to his level, hoping that he would look you in the eyes. Eventually he did. "They used to be a bright blue."

 

"Have I changed too much?" You slowly led Saix to sit on your couch. You sat closely next to him.

 

"Well, you were still a little scrawny before I last saw you." You awkwardly laughed, hoping to brighten the mood. You then remembered the new hole in your wall.

 

"I can fix that." Saix said as he realized what you were staring at.

 

"It's fine, I'm never here anyways." You looked back to Saix. "Where do we go from here? I mean...you were sort of in love with me and everything." You poked Saix where his heart would be. He crossed his arms and looked away from you. You could be a light dust of pink under his orange-like eyes.

 

"Well...I suppose we go back to the castle and keep doing our missions until Lea returns. I'm sure he would love to have the three of us together again."

 

"How about the four?" You asked. Saix raised an eyebrow at you. "Ienzo was sort of my first childhood friend before I met you guys." You scratched the back of your head.

 

"I...see. Well then, I suppose for old times sake the four of us could-"

 

"We can hang out here and eat dinner and mess with synthesis materials. No one knows about this place but us four anyways." Saix finally smiled.

 

"I've missed you so much, [Y/N]."

 

The two of you embraced on your couch until you could hear a tiny snore coming from Saix. His arms were wrapped around you, thus trapping you.

 

'I guess I'm stuck here.'

 

You decided to fall asleep too.


	14. Chapter XIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For once in a long while, I just let my fingers loose on the keyboard. I didn't know where this chapter was going, but I'm pretty proud of it. I know where this story is going, but I don't want to end it for another...well I'd like about 50 chapters.

You could hear birds singing outside as you tried your best to get your eyes open. You tossed and turned until you fell on the ground with a loud thud. "I'm up, I'm up!" You shouted as you looked around. "Oh..." You saw Saix sleeping soundly on your couch. You were back at your old house. "OH." You exclaimed a little louder as you recalled the events of last night. You winced as you remembered the anger, sorrow, and pain from Saix's voice and eyes.

"Sorry..." You muttered as you created a dark corridor. You stepped through it quickly before Saix could wake. You didn't want to face him after remembering how violent he became. You were worried for him, but maybe he would just forget about the events of yesterday if you pretended that it never happened.

\-----

You sighed as you leaned back against the clock tower. It had been a short while since you've been up here with Roxas. Ever since Roxas came to the organization you had already slowly stopped coming up here with Axel. It was sweet a few days ago when Roxas invited you back up to the clock tower, thinking that you didn't know about it.

"What's wrong?" He asked as he finished the last bit of his ice cream. You had finished yours what seemed like hours ago.

"I guess I'm just worried is all." You admitted. Roxas started to play with the stick from his ice cream.

"Don't worry, he'll be back." Roxas said. He then let himself fall back to lean on the clock tower as well. "Today was something else for me."

"Hm?" You hummed in question.

"That new girl Xion...Saix sent me on a mission with her. He wants me to be her mentor and keep going on missions with her. She doesn't answer me or talk or anything!" Roxas threw his hands up in the air for emphasis.

"I tried to talk to her the other day too." You sighed as you recalled the event. "Maybe she just needs more time. She's probably really scared and confused..." You trailed off as you became lost in thought.

"Maybe she's mute?" Roxas asked out loud.

"Don't assume that!" You laughed and teasingly pushed Roxas.

"Hey! You're gonna make me fall off!" Roxas pushed you back. You slightly flinched. "[Y/N]? Uh, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you or anything..."

"Ah, it's okay." You rubbed where Roxas touched you as you thought back to Saix's anger from before.

_'What if he hit me instead of that wall?' You thought to yourself._

"Are you sure you're okay? You've never acted this way before." Roxas slowly lifted a hand to your shoulder, careful not to startle you. "Now you're worrying me."

"Really, I'm fine. It's just something I need to get over." You brushed off Roxas' hand and gave him a smile to try and show that you were fine.

"Should we head back now?" He asked. You nodded as he got up and extended a hand to help you up. You felt something left in your palm from his hand.

"What's this?" You looked to see Roxas' ice cream stick that said 'Winner.'

"It's yours, that's what!" Roxas chuckled and opened a dark corridor for the two of you to RTC.

\-----

At some point in the middle of the night you decided that you needed some help to take your mind off of things. When you were a Somebody, you would often have midnight snacks to help you through difficult times at the shop. You began to make your way over to the kitchen, hoping that you could find some ice cream.

"[Y/N]." You heard your name being called just as you were about to walk into the kitchen. You turned around to face the Superior.

"Oh! I- Master Xemnas!" You exclaimed. You couldn't tell that he was smirking due to the castle lights being off.

"What must you be doing at this 'late' hour?" He asked.

"I was uh...going to go eat something to help me sleep." You couldn't see his eyes very clearly in the dark so you decided to look at the ground instead. "I uh, know we don't really have to eat or sleep or anything but-" You were interrupted by a chuckle from your boss.

"[Y/N], I've noticed a few...occurrences." You could hear Xemnas taking a step closer to you. "I would like to personally assign you with a task in providing research for Vexen."

"Y-yes Superior! It's an honor." You bowed, careful not to embarrass yourself by falling over or bumping into the Superior.

"I would like for you to try and court some of the other members. Write reports for Vexen to help him further understand how we can feel powerful emotions without a heart." You eyes widened in surprise from his request. "I take it that Number IX has already taken a great appeal to you. I advise you to start there. Understood?"

"Yes sir." You said very enthusiastically.

"Good." You could almost feel him smile as he walked away.

You finally walked into the kitchen and opened the freezer. You found a box of ice cream sandwiches and took one out. You used your hand that wasn't holding the ice cream to search around for the dining table so that you could sit in a chair. When you finally found one you sat down and sighed with relief and grief as you opened your frozen treat.

"I can't believe the Superior is pimping me out." You said out loud to yourself.

"What? [Y/N]?" You heard a voice within the darkness of the kitchen.

"Oh, D-d-d-d-demyx!" You exclaimed nervously. "Hahaha, what brings you here at this late hour?" You nervously laughed.

"It's always night on this world." He replied.

"O-oh yeah huh. Right." You sheepishly took another bite out of your ice cream sandwich.

"Look, [Y/N]." The light in the kitchen came on as Demyx flipped the switch. He sat back down. "I know I said some weird things...but that doesn't mean you have to avoid me."

"Avoid YOU?" You exclaimed. "You're the one who ran away from the sight of me the other day!"

"What was I supposed to say? You were with Axel, it would have been awkward and he would have never let me live it down!" Demyx covered his face and sighed. "I'm sorry, okay? But that doesn't change my feelings." Demyx crossed his arms and pouted. "I just want to forget about it and be friends again since me confessing ruined everything. What was I thinking anyways? We're Nobodies! Is this 'shadow of a heart' business even real?"

"Maybe it is." Demyx stopped nervously ranting to look at you. "If you want, we can go on a date." His eyes widened.

"I, yes, of course!" Demyx shouted. He jumped out of his seat and started to skip out of the kitchen as he sang something.

You looked down to see your ice cream sandwich about half melted.

_'I can't believe that I'm really going to let the Superior use me to woo the Organization.'_

\-----

"She finally said something today! She said my name! She's not mute!" Roxas went on to tell the story of his mission today with Xion. He seemed really excited to find out that she wasn't mute after all.

_'This could be a good opportunity...'_ You thought to yourself as Roxas continued with his story. You felt really bad for what you were about to do, but you were afraid that Xemnas would turn you into a dusk if you didn't provide him with research results. And it made a little bit of sense too since Larxene was gone. _'Wait, does that mean he has Larxene doing the same...with Zexion and Axel?'_

"Twilight Town to [Y/N]!" Roxas shouted as he waved a hand in front of your face. You suddenly remembered where you were.

"Sorry, I just kinda...got lost in thought." You gently smiled at the ground.

"Are you okay, [Y/N]?" Roxas asked.

"I guess...I'm a little jealous of you and Xion." You looked up to see Roxas' cheeks turn pink.

"J-jealous?" Roxas questioned.

"It's just you're spending all of this time with her, and I feel like our times on this clock tower turned into you always talking about her." Roxas became flustered. You tried your best to make your smirk look like a pout. "I thought you liked me, Roxas."

"I-I-I do like you, [Y/N]!"

"Is that a confession?" You finally let your smirk come through. Roxas stuttered for a while longer until you kissed his cheek. "It's okay, I'm teasing you."

Roxas' eyes wandered around for a moment in thought until he sighed.

"Or am I?"

\------

"Look, babe, I can't keep getting your missions for you." Xigbar sighed. "I don't know what's going on between you and Saix, but I can't do this forever. We have Kingdom Hearts to worry about."

"Kingdom Hearts?" You raised an eyebrow at Xigbar.

"Wait, wait, wait. Are you telling me that you don't understand the Organization's true goal? Our entire reason for existence?!" Xigbar rolled his eyes.

"Is that the thing about being whole again?" You questioned.

"Bingo, bongo, sweetcheeks." Xigbar put a hand on your shoulder. "Now I need you to keep doing your missions so we can be whole again, alright?" You nodded in agreement. "Good girl, now go work out your problems."

You looked behind Xigbar to see Saix standing in front of the glass wall. You looked to Xigbar as if to say 'do I have to?'

"As much as I enjoy it, I can't hold your hand forever, [Y/N]." You sighed in defeat and started to walk towards Saix. You kept your head down.

"Um. Mission report?" You asked the floor in front of Saix.

"Your task is to tell me why you've been avoiding me, [Y/N]." You pouted at the floor. "And look me in the eyes." You refused to look up from the floor. "Please, [Y/N]." Saix's tone changed.

"I...It sorta scared me when you got angry and...and made a hole in my wall." You were finally looking at Saix. "I mean...what if the wall were me?" You admitted.

"I'm sorry. I had no idea." Saix looked around to see if anyone was around. "The walls have ears." You looked around to see Xigbar giving you a thumbs up. You winced. "You don't have a mission for today. Why don't you go back home. I...cleaned up." Saix tried to hide his smile from Xigbar seeing.

"Okay." You smiled back and created a dark corridor.

\-----

The cobwebs were gone, your shelves were restocked, your equipment was cleaned and polished, the hole in your wall was fixed. Your home looked as if you took a step back in time when you were a Somebody.

"Should I?" You asked yourself as you looked around the place. You walked to the front and opened the door. In the window you flipped the closed sign to open. You then turned to your work bench and decided to see just how much you remembered from not synthesizing for a while.

After a while, you wiped your brow with your sleeve as you polished up your new weapon. You finally had a real sheath for your sword.

"It looks flawless." You turned to see someone else with a black coat.

"Axel?" You questioned. The cloaked man put up a finger to where his mouth would be. "I thought you were at the other castle!" You exclaimed.

"I'm supposed to be, but I needed a quick breather. So I came home." He left his hood on. "I knew you remembered since you stole my scrapbook." You winced as you remembered your mistake. "Have you talked to Isa?" You nodded your head. "Y'know, it hurt when Saix told me that you didn't remember. I only had seconds to react and pretend."

"I didn't remember at first! It wasn't until Memory's Skyscraper...and Ienzo." Axel raised an eyebrow. "He was my friend before I met you and Isa." Axel nodded. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to ruin our friendship as Nobodies be-"

"Because you were totally in love with me while Isa was in love with you?" Axel smirked.

"Wh-what?"

"Wait. You don't remember _everything_?" Axel gasped.

"I guess I don't..." You looked to the side and sighed. "I wish I did." Suddenly you felt his arms around you. You hugged him back.

"I have to go now, [Y/N]. I'll see you soon after all of this is over." Axel pulled away. "Maybe you'll remember everything then." He winked.

"Goodbye, Lea."


	15. Chapter XV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said I wanted about 50 chapters for this story, but idk. It might be 30, it might be 40? I'm not sure how long I can drag out these events. We're at about...the end of Chain of Memories now? Yeah.

    I have the best idea for our date, but it's also kinda risky because..." Demyx lowered his head as he tried to think of a way to explain to you.  


  


    "Is it because we're beings of darkness?" You asked. "The black coats?" Just recently Xigbar had finished explaining to you everything about the Organization and their goal given that no one ever really did explain it to you. You felt a little off about the whole ordeal, but as long as you can be whole again.

  


    "Yeah...um, we kinda need to dress not in this coat. But the other thing is we can't travel there without the coats." Demyx admitted.

  


    "So how about we travel there, hide our coats somewhere, then when we're done we can get our coats back and go home." Demyx smiled at your idea for a few moments before giving you a look of pure horror.

  


    "We have to get changed in front of each other?!" He exclaimed.

  


    "Um, no...we'd just wear our normal clothes under the coat." You raised an eyebrow at him as he calmed down.

  


    "Alright, well, here's yours." He handed you a piece of paper. You took it from his hands and looked it over. It was a ticket for a day at Disney Town. "I'll meet you back at your room soon so we can go."

  


    "Hm, okay then." You slowly turned away and started to walk back to your room.  


  


    _'Disney Town? It sounds familiar...'_

_  
_

\-----

  


    "So what kind of things do you do here?" You asked.

  


    "Well as long as we stay away from the castle, we can do a lot of things! There are shooting games, rollercoasters, a merry go round, and other rides." Demyx took out a map to show you. "What do you want to do first?"

  


    You looked at the map for a few moments as you scanned what was available. "Why do we have to stay away from the castle?" You asked.

  


    "Let's just say that if we stay away, then we won't be turned into dusks today."  


  


    "Uh, okay then..." You looked back to the map. How about we try this one?" You pointed to a ride on the map that had tea cups.

  


    "Sure! Let's go!" Demyx grabbed your hand and started to lead the way to the ride. You saw that there was a line when you got there. The two of you stood in line and Demyx let go of your hand. "I've always wanted to come here since...I was a Somebody. I feel like I'm a Somebody again without that coat."

  


    "It is weird to wear regular clothes again." You said. "I had to go home to get my old stuff."

  


    "You still have your Somebody house?" Demyx asked.

  


    "Uh." Shoot, you weren't supposed to say that. "Kinda. It's old and abandoned. I don't have the time to clean it and I don't want to." You hoped that would work.

  


    "Bad memories?" Demyx asked. You nodded. "Then we'll make better ones today." Demyx took your hand as you were now in the front of the line. The attendant opened the gate and he led the two of you to a blue cup. "Do you know what to do?" He asked.

  


    In front of you was a weird contraption. "I don't think I do." You admitted.

  


    "I've heard about it before. Just watch and learn." Demyx put his hands on the circular contraption. You followed. Soon the ride started and so did Demyx. We began to spin the contraption. The tea cup began to spin too. You finally got the idea of the ride and started to spin it as well. When the ride was over, the two of you were giggling as you exited the ride feeling dizzy.

  


    "What's next?" You asked. Demyx brought up the map again. "I'd say it's your turn to pick." Demyx seemed to carefully be studying the map.  


  


    "How about this one?" Demyx pointed to a skull and cross bones on the map. "It's a pirate ride."

  


    "Doesn't Luxord get sent on missions to the Pirate World?" You laughed.

  


    "Let's forget about work for today." Demyx said as he grabbed your hand yet again to lead you to the next ride. This one had an even longer line.

  


    "Is there a day night cycle on this world?" You asked him.

  


    "I'm pretty sure, why?" He asked.

  


    "How long do we have here? There are a lot of lines." You said.

  


    "Probably another five hours. They close late at night." Before you knew it, you were being helped into the front of a tiny boat. Demyx scooted in close to you. The ride had a few drops that got you and Demyx wet, as well as some cool scenes of pirates fighting. When you got off you were laughing at the fact that you two got wet. "Want to see something cool?" Demyx asked. He then took you behind some bathrooms nearby so no one could see.

  


    "Is this where you kill me?" You joked. Demyx rolled his eyes and began to use his element of water to dry the two of you off. "Oh cool! Thanks, Demyx! I totally forgot that you could do that."  


  


    "I almost forgot too!" Demyx then brought out the map again. "It's your turn!" You looked around the map for a while until you found the perfect place nearby.

  


    "How about this? It's a haunted mansion." Demyx started to shiver. "What? Are you scared? Can we even feel fear? I suddenly don't remember what it feels like." You admitted. (Quick A/N: My theory is that the closer a Nobody is to their heartless, the more they can feel. If their Nobody is already defeated and went to Kingdom Hearts, then they feel the most when they are at the castle.)  


  


    "Um, yeah you're right! No fear here!" Demyx gave a weak smile. You took his hand and started to lead him to the mansion. There was another long line that gave you two the opportunity to read the funny headstones. Once inside, the effects got better. The two of you had to walk for a while until you could sit down on the actual ride itself. There were scenes of ghosts and some singing here and there. Demyx held onto you for the entire ride. When the two of you got off, he was still hanging onto you.

  


    "That wasn't so bad." You said. Demyx peeled himself off of you. He looked at the map for a while to decide where to go next.  


  


    "How about this shooting game? It's a ride and a game in one!" It took a while to get to this ride. Before you got on, you started to feel a little bit dizzy in line. It was one of the longer line, but it also felt as if it was going by fast.

  


    _"I heard Disney Town is a fun place to go to. How would we even get to another world?" Lea looked up the stars. You seemed to be on top of a roof with him._

_  
_

_"I never thought about going to another world." You said. Lea looked back to you and smiled. He tasseled your hair._

_  
_

_"Remember Ventus? He told me there was a fun shooting game there. He had just gotten back from the place."_

_  
_

_"Ventus came back? And you saw him without me?!" Lea then looked behind you. You turned around too to see Isa sit next to the two of you on the roof._

_  
_

_"What are you two fighting about this time?" He asked. He smiled at you._

_  
_

_"Lea thinks we can travel to another world just because Ventus did." You rolled your eyes._

_  
_

_"You really want to travel?" Isa looked at Lea and raised an eyebrow._

_  
_

_"Well the more people remember me, the longer I'll live on in their hearts, right?" Isa looked up to the stars._

_  
_

_"Do you think the castle has any answers?" Isa asked.  
_

_  
_

_"Let's go find out!" Lea stood up and took Isa's hand. He forcibly made him stand up. He started to drag him away._

_  
_

_"Lea let go of me!"_

_  
_

_"No, we're going to go find out!"_

_  
_

_Isa sighed in defeat. "See you tomorrow, [Y/N]."_

_  
_

"Hey, [Y/N]? Are you okay? I thought you were listening to my story?" Demyx shook his hand in front of your face to get your attetion.

  


    "Oh, Demyx, sorry I was..." You trailed off.

  


    "Well it's okay, we're about to get on."

  


    Over the next few hour the two of you had went on a few more rides. At some point, the two of you went to get something to eat. You ended up getting sweets.

  


    "Are you sure we should ride a roller coaster after we ate sweets?" You questioned Demyx.  


  


    "It's the last roller coaster! We'll be fine. We can ride it then go home."  


  


    "Fine then." You said as the two of you got into the front of the roller coaster. The two of you were strapped in. The ride started and you started to scream from the adrenaline. You raised your hands up. You were enjoying yourself so much that you never noticed Demyx holding his stomach. When the two of you got off Demyx ran to the nearest garbage can to throw up. "I told you so!" You exclaimed as he finished puking.

  


    "I should have liste-" Demyx's words were stopped when a firework went off in the sky. He wiped his mouth then stood next to you to watch the sky.

  


    "You didn't tell me that there were fireworks." You said. As soon as they were over, Demyx took your hand.

  


    "I think we should head back now." He said. The two of your exited Disney Town to go to the outskirts where your coats were. But there was a problem. "Where's my coat?!" Demyx exclaimed. He frantically search in the bush where his was stashed as well as the nearby bushes.

  


    "Just pick up another one when we get back." You said as you created a dark corridor. You took Demyx's hand and led him through back to the castle. You made sure that you dropped him off in him room so that no one would see him without a coat.

  


    Demyx sighed. "I can't believe I lost a coat." He said as he got another one out of his closet. You laughed.

  


    "It's not like someone stole it. It's probably still out in that field."

  


    "Then why didn't we keep looking for it?" Demyx whined.

  


    "It was funny." You then created a dark corridor to your room. "I had a nice time, Demyx. Maybe we can do it another time." You then walked through and came out into your room.

  


    "Roxas?" What are you doing here?" You asked. He was laying down on your bed.

  


    "Last time I checked, this was my room." He got up and started to look around. "Oh...wait. My room doesn't have a bathroom." You laughed and sat down next to him.

  


    "Have you been sleeping in my room all night?" Roxas rubbed the back of his head and laughed.

  


    "I guess so." He then yawned. "I've been feeling really sleepy lately, even on my missions. It's been happening ever since Axel and the other half left last week."

  


    "It's already been a week?" You look up the ceiling, wondering if Axel and Zexion were okay. You then remembered how Axel told you that your Somebody was in love with him. "Hey Roxas, do you remember your life as a Somebody?" You waited for a while, thinking that we was coming up with an answer. "Roxas?" You asked again after a few moments. You looked to see the boy was passed out on your bed. You tried to shake him awake, you didn't want to carry him back to his room. "Roxas?!" You shouted after he wouldn't wake up after numerous attempts. "Shit." You said outloud. You wondered what was wrong with him and what you should do. You then created a dark corridor. "I hope he knows..."

  


\-----

  


    "Saix?" You asked as you slowly walked into his room. His room was a lot different than anyone else's. He had a small sleeping quarters and a large living room like area with a huge glass wall.

  


    "[Y/N]? What are you doing here?" He asked as he frantically put something back into a drawer.

  


    "Roxas...he's unconscious on my bed. He said he was feeling really sleepy for the past week an-"

  


    "We must get him at once." Saix walked passed you and out of his room. You raised an eyebrow as you were left alone in his room. You wondered why Saix reverted back to the person that he shows everyone else, instead of his normal self. His eyes also seemed to be...glowing. You created a dark corridor back to your room.

  


    In your room you saw Saix picking up Roxas. You followed him as he carried him to his room. Saix set Roxas down in the blonde haired boy's bed. "[Y/N], the Superior is coming here soon. I'm sorry, but I must ask you to leave."

  


    "Is he going to be okay?" You asked. Saix turned to you, his expression hard.  


  


    "Who knows?"  



	16. Chapter XVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does Demyx think you're dating or what? I don't know myself...

    "Saix, what do you mean you don't know? What's really going on here? Why won't Roxas wake up?" You questioned your old friend in a stern tone. You didn't know why he was acting like a jerk, but you weren't going to stand for it.

  


  


    "Silence." You raised an eyebrow at him.

  


  


    "Isa." You said as you gave him a cold glare.

  


  


    "I am no longer Isa, [Y/N]." Saix finally turned his body towards you. "The members at Castle Oblivion are all terminated."

  


  


    "Lea is gone? And Ienzo?" Something was wrong. Your eyes were welling up with tears. "Is that why you're acting like this? Because Lea is gone?" You grabbed onto Saix's coat as you let the tears fall from your eyes. You couldn't break eye contact with him.

  


  


    "I've seen your reports to Vexen." Saix gently shoved you off of him. You held your hands in front of where your heart would have been.

  


  


    "My reports..." You trailed off. "Those mean nothing! It's an assignment from the Superior!" You turned your head back to Roxas. You stared at his sleeping body, worried that he would never wake up again too.

  


  


    "[Y/N]'s reports are none of your concern, Saix." You turned your head to see Xemnas finally in the room. He locked eyes with you for a moment before raising an eyebrow. "Ah? Are these tears I see?" You quickly tried to wipe them away. "I expect your report to give full details on how the Castle Oblivion news has affected your emotions."   


  


  


    You nodded your head and looked down. You felt ashamed that Saix had found out about your special assignment. You knew he loved you as a Somebody, but you never knew if he loved you now. Did he dwell on the memories of love? Did he even want you in his life as a Nobody?

  


  


    "I've also added a new assignment to your list." You looked up to Xemnas. "Xion is now without Roxas. We don't know how long this will last. I need you to accompany her on further missions now that she can use the keyblade."   


  


  


    "Xion can use the keyblade?" You looked back to Roxas for a bit before facing Xemnas again. "Lord Xemnas I accept but-"

  


  


    "But?"

  


  


    "Are the Castle Oblivion members really terminated? They're...gone forever?" Xemnas walked past you and Saix to take a look at Roxas.

  


  


    "We have not heard from them." Xemnas turned to you. You looked down.

  


  


    "Lord Xemnas, I presume that's enough information for her. She doesn't even have a number." Saix was still using his stern voice. Was he that upset about your assignment?

  


  


    "[Y/N], you are dismissed."

  


  


    You turned and started to walk out of the room. Just as you passed Saix you whispered something to him. "I'm sorry, Isa." You then continued to leave the room just before hearing the Superior question Saix. "Isa?"

  


  


    You smirked, if Saix was going to act like your friendship from before meant nothing then you figured it was time for the Superior to know about it. You weren't just some useless Nobody with no number. You knew that you had a worth. You knew who could see that worth.

  


  


    "Number Zero, _The Toxic Synthesis._ " You looked up to see Xigbar looking down at you. His smirk wiped yours off. Suddenly you could feel tears welling up yet again. "Whoa, whoa, whoa." Xigbar came closer to you and put a hand on your shoulder. "What happened in there?"

  


  


    "Roxas...he..." You let a few tears fall. You watched as they hit the ground, creating tiny puddles. "Roxas won't wake up and...Castle Oblivion."

  


  


    "Ah, about that..." Xigbar started to lead you away further from Roxas' room. "I'm not sure about this whole Roxas thing, but I understand you're worried about your little friends at Castle Oblivion. Now look, Axel was sent on a very special mission there. Remember how I said I used to be a hitman?" You nodded. "Well Axel is the hitman of the organization. His mission was to take out the traitors."

  


  


    "Zexion said that he was suspected to be a traitor..." You could feel your tears coming back again.

  


  


    "Is he a traitor?"

  


  


    "No he isn't!" You exclaimed.

  


  


    "Whoa there." Xigbar stopped the two of you from walking. "If he isn't a traitor, then no need to worry." You looked down to the ground for the hundreth time that day. "It'll be fine. Your friends will come back, the traitors won't, and you can live all happy yet again."

  


  


    "Aqua..." You muttered under your breath. Xigbar raised an eyebrow. "You said Aqua took away your eye, but that's a lie."

  


  


    "How do you know? You weren't there." Xigbar looked concerned.

  


  


    "It was Terra." You could feel your body start to sway. You didn't know how these words were coming out. You didn't know what you were talking about. You then stumbled for a bit until Xigbar caught you.

  


  


    "You're talking nonsense over here." Xigbar picked you up.

  


  


    "I know..." You muttered as you felt fatigue take over your body. You watched as your vision faded in and out as Xigbar took you back to your room. He laid you down then sat at the foot of the bed.

  


  


    "What was that? Are you okay?" He asked. You gently shook your head no.

  


  


    "It wasn't me talking. The words just came out." You turned to your side. "I don't even know those people."

  


  


    "You should get some rest. I don't think a Nobody can take all of that crying in one day." You sighed as you let sleep overcome your body.

  


  


\-----

  


  


    "[Y/N]." You moved a bit in your bed. "[Y/N]!" You groaned as you slowly sat up.

  


  


    "What is it?" You opened your eyes to see Xion. "Oh, Xion." You yawned then stood up.   


  


  


    "We have our first mission together." You nodded your head as you walked to your bathroom to brush your teeth. Xion followed you. "What are you doing?" She looked in awe as you began to brush your teeth.

  


  


    "I'm brushing my teeth." You said after you spit out into the sink. You used water to rinse out the sink, your toothbrush, and your mouth.

  


  


    "Why?" Xion asked as she followed you back into your room.

  


  


    "Hm...Do Nobodies even have to brush their teeth?" You said. "I'm not sure Xion, I know Somebodies have to do it. Don't you remember?"

  


  


    Xion shook her head. "I don't know who I was or how I got here." You winced, that was an awkward question.

  


  


    "Alright, so a mission huh?" Xion nodded her head. "Where to?"

  


  


\-----

  


  


    "Now we go get ice cream." Xion said as her keyblade vanished in a spark of light.   


  


  


    "I haven't had ice cream with Roxas or Axel in forever..." You said. Xion smiled as she led you to the ice cream shop then to the clock tower. She sat down then patted the spot next to her. She gave you your ice cream as you sat down.

  


  


    "Usually we talk now." She said as she took a bite out of her ice cream. "I don't know what to say."

  


  


    "I can tell you a story."

  


  


    "About what?" She asked.

  


  


    "You have to promise not to tell anyone." Xion nodded her head enthusiastically. "Okay, it's about how I ended up here." You took the last bite of your ice cream and set the stick down. "My name, [Y/N], it doesn't have an x in it. I'm the only Nobody to keep my Somebody name. I grew up in Radiant Garden like half of the Organization. I didn't know a lot of people, but I did know Zexion, Axel and Saix."

  


  


    "Which one was Zexion?" Xion asked.

  


  


    "He was always in the library. He also got sent to Castle Oblivion. Anyways, their Somebody names were Ienzo, Lea, and Isa. I knew Ienzo before Lea and Isa. Ienzo and I used to take baths together as babies." You laughed. "Then one day, he had to go away to the big castle in the middle of town. He was taken in by a mentor to teach him some science stuff I didn't understand. I had Lea and Isa, though. We caused all kinds of trouble in town. I would make them food all of the time too." You stopped for a moment to look at Xion. Her big blue eyes were wide, waiting for the next part.

  


  


    "Isa was in love with me, although I never knew it. And I...I was in love with Lea. I think he knew it, but didn't want to hurt Isa's feelings if he loved me too."

  


  


    "Love?" Xion asked.

  


  


    "Oh right. Love can be a few things. It can be the love a mom has for her child, how she protects her child from harm. It can also be the love you have for your best friend, like me and Ienzo. He was my good friend, and I loved him as a friend. The last kind of love...It's when two people care about each other so much that they decide that want to spend the rest of their lives with each other."

  


  


    "Roxas is my friend, does that mean I love him?" She asked.

  


  


    "Is he your best friend?"

  


  


    "I don't think so. Not yet. But when he is then that's love?" You laughed.

  


  


    "Sure it can." Xion nodded her head. "Anyways, one day Lea and Isa got a job at the castle. So they left me to go there. I hadn't seen Ienzo in years. I would barely see Isa and Lea after that day. But...one day an accident happened at the castle. The town wasn't sure what it was, but we weren't allowed to go near it anymore. I started to forget about Lea and Isa until-"

  


  


    "The day you became a Nobody?" Xion asked.

  


  


    "Sort of. I had amnesia when I first started here. It took me a while to remember, but soon I was reunited with Ienzo, not Zexion. I was so happy to have my childhood best friend back. He was happy too, I think. I would make an effort to go to the library to see him and talk about books. He seemed to just enjoy my company."

  


  


    "And Axel and Saix?" Xion asked.

  


  


    "Well...they know that I remember. Axel and I haven't talked about it much because...he left to Castle Oblivion just after he found out. I thought Saix and I were going to be friends again but, he's been really cold to me. I don't know what's gotten into him."

  


  


    "You have me and Roxas." Xion said. "And Axel when he comes back. And Zexion too!" You gave Xion a smile, although there was hurt in your eyes. She was so optimistic about Axel and Zexion returning. You didn't know if they would. You wished that you could speak with them.

  


  


    "Yeah Xion, you're right."

  


  


\-----

  


  


    "[Y/N]? How come you've been so down lately?" Demyx asked as he looked over your shoulder. "You're burning the chicken!" You looked down at what you were cooking to indeed see that you were burning the chicken. You turned off the stove and put the pan on a cold burner. You sighed and sat down at the kitchen table.

  


  


    "I can't do anything right." You sulked. Demyx sat down next to you and pouted.

  


  


    "That's not true." He looked as if he was thinking of more ways to make you feel better. "Is it because Roxas is asleep and Saix isn't talking to you and Axel and Zexion are probably dead?"

  


  


     You turned to Demyx with a horrified look on your face. "I mean that's exactly why but, why would you say it out loud like that?" You put your head in your hands, trying not to cry.

  


      


    "You don't think you can fix anything?" Demyx asked.

  


         


    "I don't know..." You felt useless.

  


      


    "You should at least try." Demyx put a hand on your shoulder. "The [Y/N] I know and love wouldn't just give up without trying." You gave a small smile, although Demyx couldn't see it.

  


      


    "I guess there is something that I can do..."  



	17. Chapter XVII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My short hiatus for this story is over now that I have finally completed Chain of Memories and reviewed 358/2 Days. Wow this story had been getting serious lately. I should try to romance it up a little more now.

"See? I knew you couldn't just give up, [Y/N]!" Demyx exclaimed as he gave you a gentle pat on the back. You turned to him still with a saddened look on your face. "Hey, what's wrong?" He asked.

 

"I have to go to Castle Oblivion." You said, bringing a hand up to where your heart would be. "I can't just sit around here and wonder what could have happened to the other members...especially my friends." You looked to the floor as Demyx gasped. "So I need you to cover for me, Demyx."

 

"Cover for you?!" He exclaimed. Demyx held up his hands in defense. "How am I supposed to do that? I don't want Saix to turn me into a dusk!"

 

You sighed and shook your head. "Demyx, I just need you to accompany Xion on her missions. You haven't had any for a while, haven't you?" You tilted your head. Demyx sulked. "And please, if Xion asks, tell her to keep it quiet for her own good."

 

"Why do I always have to do the dirty jobs? Am I the right guy for this?" He whined.

 

"Of course you are. There's no one else that I can trust, Demyx." You kissed him on the cheek before turning around. "If someone needs my help from fading away...I have to go now." You turned your head to give Demyx a smile before leaving.

 

"Why, me?" Demyx groaned.

 

\-----

 

“Castle Oblivion...how do I get there?” You said out loud. You tried to think about a place where Axel and Zexion would be. You created a dark corridor and let out a breathe. “Okay, here goes.” You entered and closed your eyes until you heard the heel of your boot make a clacking noise. You opened your eyes to see that you were in a white room.

 

“I did it!” You looked around and saw a purple orb. You walked over to it. “Hello...what are you?” You reached out to touch it and then realized that there were 13 floors up and 13 floors down. You rolled your eyes. “Of course.” You decided to go to floor 8, hoping Axel would be there.

 

“Axel?” You called out. You looked around a bit to see no one and get no response. “Where else...can I look?” After a few floors you came to a door where you heard voices shouting. Was that Zexion? You burst through the doors to find Zexion and Axel along with a gray haired kid not dressed in Organization clothes. You realized that the kid was about to attack Zexion before you ran towards him and blocked the kid from touching Zexion.

 

“[Y/N]?!” Axel and Zexion both called out.

 

“Out of my way!” The gray haired kid called as he threw you to the side. You fell to the floor with a grunt.

 

“Ienzo! Don’t!” You called out as you watched the kid grab him by the throat. You looked from Axel to the scene in front of you with tears in your eyes. You got up and hurried to the gray haired kid with your weapon in hand and knocked Zexion out of his hands. Zexion coughed on the floor as you took a battle stance in front of the kid, ready to fight.

 

Just as the kid was about to open his mouth, Axel came from behind him and struck him in the head. He fell to the floor with a thud as more tears rolled down from your eyes.

 

“Axel...you...I told you Zexion was my friend!” You shouted at him.

 

“He’s a traitor, I have to take care of business, [Y/N].” Axel tried to touch your shoulders but you stepped back.

 

“Don’t touch me.” You turned to Zexion and crouched down next to him to make sure he was okay. “Please, I don’t care if he is a traitor. Spare him, Axel.” You could hear him sigh. You looked up at Axel.

 

“I have to stay here for a while longer, [Y/N]. If you can keep quiet about that, then you can have your precious Ienzo.” Zexion snarled at Axel. Axel smirked. “You just can’t take him back to the castle.”

 

“I...I understand.” You said. You helped Zexion up as you created a dark corridor that would lead to your old house. “I hope you come back to the Organization soon, Axel.” You said before walking through with a limping Zexion.

 

\-----

 

“Are you sure you’ll be okay here, alone?” You asked before walking through the dark corridor. “I don’t want to leave you here.” You admitted.

 

Zexion gently smiled at you before embracing you. “I’ll be fine for now.”

 

“I’ll...I’ll visit you everyday after every mission.” You said as you tried to not cry into Zexion’s shoulder.

 

“I’ll see you soon then, [Y/N].” Zexion kissed the top of your head before giving you a gentle push towards the dark corridor. “Now go.” You nodded your head before turning around and walking through the portal.

 

\-----

 

“Roxas, you wouldn’t believe what I’ve found out today.” You said as you sat at the foot of his bed. You frowned. “I can’t believe they’re almost all gone.” You thought back to those who have been eliminated. You didn’t know them very well, but you were friends with Larxene. You couldn’t believe that she wanted to overthrow the Organization.

 

“So much has happened. I hope you wake up soon, Sora.” You got up and kissed Roxas’ forehead before leaving his room.

 

“Whatcha doing in there again?” An arm slug around your shoulder as your walked down the hallway towards your room. It was Xigbar.

 

“Just worried is all.” 

 

“You really feel a lot for a Nobody.” Xigbar stopped walking and took his arm away from your shoulder. You stopped too.

 

“I don’t know if I have a great memory or if I’m even a Nobody at all.” You chuckled.

 

Xigbar suddenly got closer to you, enough so that he could whisper. “You don’t think, you have a Heartless close by,  do you?”

 

“What are you talking about?” You snorted.

 

“When Vexen was pronounced erased, you bet your ass I raided his lab.” Xigbar laughed. “I learned a thing or two. If your heartless is close by, you’ll probably feel a little more than the rest of us do.” Xigbar smirked.

 

“Oh!” You then suddenly realized that Xigbar must have seen your reports to Vexen. 

 

“I’ve seen them all right, toots.” Xigbar clapped your back before starting to walk away. “Your reports go directly to Xemnas now. He doesn’t expect much anymore now.”

 

You winced. That was embarrassing. You really hoped that no one else found out about you reports. You really hoped that Xemnas didn’t react negatively when he found out that you knew Zexion, Saix, and Axel in the past.

 

\-----

 

“[Y/N]! You’re back!” You sat up in your bed to see Demyx bolt into your room. “Xigbar teased me saying he just flirted with you so I figured you were back.” You stood up and rolled your eyes. “You weren’t gone for long, what happened?”

 

Memories flashed in your mind of Zexion, Axel and the Riku Replica.

 

“I couldn’t find anyone…” You looked to the ground. Demyx came closer and hugged you. You hugged him back.

 

“At least you tried. I would have never had the courage to do something like that.” Demyx loosened his grip on you to look you in the face and smile.

 

“Thanks, Demyx. I don’t think I would have taken the chance without you.”


	18. Chapter XVIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean, I’m trying to add romance but it’s so hard whilst trying to keep characters as OOC as possible. I hope the hugs and cheek/forehead/head kisses can suffice for now.

    Xigbar used a dark corridor to portal himself to his seat in the meeting room. There were many empty seats except for one. He looked to his side for his gaze to be met by Xemnas who was lost in thought. Xigbar put on his best fake pout as he interrupted the Superior from his thoughts.

    “How could you?” Xigbar chuckled. Xemnas turned his head to look at the gunslinger. “You're tampering with Number Zero.”  Xigbar slightly waved around a finger for emphasis.

    “Her research will be of great use for what's left of the Replica Program.” Xemnas gave a small smile. Xigbar scoffed at the fake emotion.

    “She told me the truth about this.” Xigbar pointed to his eye. “And then I remembered. It was Terra, not Aqua. Were you afraid?” Xigbar chuckled. “You're not Terra anymore, I wouldn't be upset about the entire situation. That's not the main objective here.”

    “I apologize for tampering with your memory.” Xemnas admitted. “You seem closer to [Y/N]. Does she remember her past?” Xemnas asked. 

    “She was close by the entire time. She was childhood friends with Ienzo and had a love triangle with Isa and Lea.” Xemnas smirked at this information.

    “I believe that she can be a great asset to our plan as long as Saix continues to avoid her distractions. Perhaps she could be another vessel.” Xigbar raised an eyebrow at the statement.

    “What makes you say that? She doesn't know anything about the darkness. I doubt that she'll embrace it easily.” Xigbar waved a hand around as he spoke.

    “Her heart was strong enough to become a Nobody. Not only that, she was able to extract emotions from her past comrades. Also…” Xemnas trailed off as he grinned. “She has a heartless.”

    “Don't we all have a heartless?” Xigbar snorted. Xemnas closed his eyes as he shook his head slightly.

    “I've been to see her heartless. It greatly resembles her.” Xigbar raised an eyebrow in disbelief as his mouth was left agape. [Y/N] had a humanoid heartless. The only other known heartless like that was...Ansem.

\-----

    “Hey Zexion, I never read your note.” You admitted as you watched him work in your synthesis lab. Zexion put down was he was doing to turn and talk to you.

    “My note? Well, it was to inform you that I would try to escape here to Radiant Garden if something were to happen.” You nodded your head. Zexion turned back to the table and continued what he was doing. He put on a pair of goggles and gestured for you to take a few steps back.

    “Whatcha doing there?” You asked, trying to peer over his shoulder. Zexion steadied himself as he dropped some purple liquid into a beaker of green liquid. A puff of brown smoke emitted from the concoction. “Your blade, [Y/N].” Zexion asked, extending a hand towards you without looking.

    “Um, okay then.” You summoned your weapon. Zexion took it and went over to a tray and set it down. He poured the liquid on to the blade. You watched as the metal changed color from silver to black. Zexion waited a few moments before polishing your sword before giving it back to you. “What did you do to it?” You asked.

    “Don't tell me you weren't paying attention. I thought you went to synthesis school?” Zexion smirked. You rolled your eyes. “It’s extra protection and strength. As I have told you, there are two keyblade wielders out there ready to strike the Organization. This will help you in case the time ever comes.”

    You looked at your blade with awe for a moment before wincing at what Zexion had said. “As long as Roxas stays in the Organization, then we shouldn’t have to worry, right?” Zexion shook his head.

    “Riku is still out there.”

\-----

“What’s the matter, [Y/N]?” Xion asked as the two of you sat on top of the clock tower. You had already finished your ice cream. Xion was still working on hers as you practically inhaled the frozen treat. “Is it about Axel? Or Roxas? Or-”

“Everything has just been getting so serious lately!” You exclaimed, cutting off Xion. She raised a finger just as she was about to reply, but stopped herself. You continued. “I’m worried about Roxas, Axel isn’t acting like himself, Zexion is gone, Saix isn’t the same, and Xigbar has been extremely nice to me lately. I think he’s read my report-” You gasped as you covered your mouth, realizing that Xion didn’t know everything about you.

“Reports? Do you have a special mission?” Xion scratched her head in confusion.

“I…” You sighed. “I do actually. My reports used to go to Vexen and the Superior, but I’m pretty certain that Saix is the one who reads them now that Vexen is gone. I’ve heard that Saix spends a lot of time in Vexen’s old lab, he must be using my research to pick up where Vexen left off…”

“What kind of research is it?” You looked to see that Xion was finally done with her ice cream.

“Well...I can’t really say.” 

“You said Axel isn’t himself. Have you heard from him?” You sighed again, trying to figure out just how much you could tell Xion.

“No…” You lied. “I have a feeling that he isn’t gone. He should be back by now.” Xion put a hand on your shoulder. You looked to her as she gave you a reassuring smile.

“I bet he’ll be back soon. Then he can have ice cream with me, you and Roxas.” You smiled back at the poor girl. If only she knew…

\-----

“[Y/N]!” Demyx shouted as he ran down the hallway to your room. He busted through the portal and then began to pound his fist on your door. “[Y/N]!”

“What?” You asked as you opened the door. You raised an eyebrow as Demyx panted in front of you, holding up a finger. “Why didn’t you just make a dark corridor?”

“I...that’s not the point right now! Roxas is awake!” You pushed past Demyx as you rushed to Roxas’ room. “Who’s running now?!” Demyx shouted back at you.

“Roxas!” You exclaimed as you burst through his door. You instantly winced as you saw Saix, but walked past him anyways to Roxas. “Roxas, you’re finally awake!” Roxas gave you a surprised look. “I was so worried.” You explained as you gave him a hug. You could hear Saix clear his throat. You let go of Roxas and faced Saix.

“What is it, Isa?” Roxas raised an eyebrow at Saix’s true name.

“If you could excuse us. I was just explaining to Roxas about Castle Oblivion.”

“What happened at Castle Oblivion?” Roxas questioned. Saix motioned for you to leave the room. He didn’t seem as angry as he was before, but you still decided that you would defy him.

“They’ve been eliminated, Roxas.” You said while putting a hand on his shoulder.

“So that means...Axel…” Roxas looked to the ground.

“Yes, Axel is terminated.” Saix said.

    You could hear a small hint of sorrow in his voice. You stood up and walked towards Saix. You rested your hand on his shoulder for a moment before whispering. “You and I both know that’s a lie.” You then walked out of Roxas’ room, leaving the two of them to talk about the matter.

    “How come I always catch you when you’re leaving the little dude’s room?” Someone called out to you. You turned to see Xigbar.

    “Roxas is awake.” You gestured back to Roxas’ room. “He just found out about Castle Oblivion.”

    “The poor thing, he seemed pretty attached to Lea.” You quickly turned your head back to Xigbar. Did he just say Lea? “Oh, my bad.” Xigbar put up his hands in defense.

    You decided to play along. “Isa is talking to him.”

    “The two of you used to be close too, right? Lately he seems a little mad with you, I wonder why’s that? Oh, right!” Xigbar made a fist and hit his other hand with an open palm. “Your reports!”

    “Why do you always tease me?” You questioned.

    Xigbar chuckled before tasseling your hair. “I enjoy it.”

    “You can feel joy?” You raised an eyebrow. “I’m starting to think that these emotions are all just memory…” You looked away from Xigbar.

    “Want to find out?” Xigbar extended a hand towards you. You took a slight step back from him.

    “What do you mean?” You tilted your head slightly to the side as you locked eyes with him. You took another step back, not entirely sure what the older man was trying to tell you.

    “I’m saying, let’s go on a date right now and see what happens. Let’s just call it research.”

    You took a step forward and put your hand in his.


	19. Chapter XIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m currently replaying KH2FM as I go in chronological order for the games until the 29th. Damn, is the reader going to be angsty as hell when Sora wakes up and the Organization starts to taunt him.

   You stepped through the dark corridor to be met with construction, fountains, and people all around. You were home. You turned to Xigbar where he put on his hood and then flipped yours on as well. You lightly slapped his hand away as you fixed your hood yourself.

   “Home sweet home, am I right?” He asked. You couldn’t tell if Xigbar could see your face, but you were still confused. Why would he take you here for? There was nothing too grand about Hollow Bastion the way it was now.

   “Why do we have our hoods on?” You asked as you pulled on your hood strings.

   “I’m not sure about you, but it would be weird for anyone to see me, especially if they remember me.” Xigbar started to walk and you followed a footstep behind.

   “So?” You still didn’t understand the dilemma. The Moogles had seen you after you had disappeared for a while and were relieved to see you. You didn’t think of the people here to see you again to be weird.

   “I’m dead, sweetheart.” Xigbar chuckled. You gave a nervous laugh alongside him.

   “Haha...yeah, dead.” You hadn’t thought of it before, but Xigbar was right. You died. That’s how you create a Nobody. He had explained this to you before a while back. You lost your heart, it could have be a heartless, or it could have already been released by Roxas or Xion and already returned to Kingdom Hearts.

   “You don’t have any idea where we’re going, do you?” Xigbar took a lot of twists and turns and went down alleyways. He must have been really trying to avoid someone. You just hoped that you wouldn’t pass by your old synthesis shop where Zexion was hiding out.

   “I don’t remember any romantic spots here ever since it became Hollow Bastion.” You scoffed. The fountains used to be really pretty. You would go there often with Isa and Lea when you finally learned how to climb and jump, but they were gone now.

   “I’m sure you’ll like it.” Xigbar finally stopped in front of an older looking house. You could see cobwebs on the windows.

   “What is this place?” You asked. Xigbar didn’t answer. All he did was open the door with some keys from his pocket then walk in. He gestured for you to follow. He tried his best to wipe away any cobwebs in front of you as you walked in. He told you to stop where you were standing so he could close the door. He then opened a few curtains to let some light pour in. Surrounding you were many mirrors throughout the room. A few were covered. From what you could see, they were ordinary mirrors.

   “I want you to see this one.” Xigbar led you to a covered mirror and slowly took off the cover to avoid a lot of dust from coming up. He took off his hood and motioned for you to look.

   “Whoa...you’re...so young.” You gasped. Xigbar’s face looked around ten years younger. His hair was shorter and slicked back without his gray streak. You could also see both of his eyes staring you down. You shivered.

   “This is me at like twenty-something. I was a pretty dashing fellow, I’d say.” Xigbar checked himself out in the mirror as you tried to stop the pink hue from coming up to your cheeks. He did look way more attractive when he was younger. You didn’t see Xigbar as someone who you would hold close in a romantic way as he was now, but maybe if the times were right...you’d probably fall for this younger one.

   “Who’s Terra?” You asked him as you had remembered the odd event from a while ago. Xigbar began to chuckle.

   “Why, he’s actually the one who did this.” He pointed to his eyepatch as he turned to you. You slowly nodded. “That day you said his name, don’t think too much of it. Number One was just testing something out on you.”

   “The Superior made me say that?!” You asked, shocked. You had no idea that he had the power to make you say things.

   “He wanted to see if you could resist his power. You sorta passed.” Xigbar put his hood back on.

   “Why would he do that for?” You asked. You were Number Zero, you weren’t special at all. You had lost your seat in the meeting room ever since Roxas had come into the Organization. Xemnas decided that thirteen seats were enough and you and Xion could listen from standing on the floor.

   “No idea.” Xigbar lied.

\-----

   “And where were you all day?” Demyx asked as you walked into the kitchen. He was sitting down at the dining table.

   “I had...things to do. It’s none of your concern where I’m at.” You walked to the fridge and pulled out some sea salt ice cream from the freezer part. You sat down near Demyx.

   “Well, I’d like to know where my girl is.” Demyx pouted and crossed his arms.

   “Whoa, whoa, whoa.” You held your hands in front of you in defense, along with your ice cream. “One date doesn’t make us official.” You said.

   “What?!” Demyx exclaimed. He then sulked. “Girls are so confusing…” You giggled.

   “Could we even have a stable relationship without hearts?” You asked. Demyx pondered for a moment.

   “So are you telling me when we complete Kingdom Hearts then you’ll be my girlfriend?” He looked excited. You punched Demyx on the shoulder.

   “No promises.” You smirked.

   “Are we...allowed to go on another date?” Demyx asked as he scooted closer to you. He was almost resting his head on your shoulder.

   “You never asked me for another one yet, have you?” You shoved the rest of your ice cream in Demyx’s mouth. He immediately grabbed it by the popsicle stick and cried out as it was cold.

   “Cold! Ah!” He held the ice cream as if it were super sticky. “Could we go on another one?” He finally asked.

   “Sure.” You then got up and started to walk out of the kitchen.

   “I’ll let you know when I think of a place!” Demyx shouted back at you.

\-----

   “It’s too bad we have to picnic inside.” You sighed as you started to take food items out of a basket. You and Zexion were on your living room floor on a picnic blanket with a basket filled with food that you made back at the castle.

   “It’s not very romantic, but it’d what we have to work with.” Zexion said. You suddenly stopped setting things up and looked at him, bewildered. What did he say?

   “Romantic?” You questioned. Zexion rolled his eyes.

   “Oh don’t tell me you’re that dense, [Y/N].” Zexion started to help unpack items from the basket for you. “I’ve loved you when we were Somebodies. Without a heart, I can still remember what it felt like.” Zexion explained.

   “I...you...huh?” You were at a loss for words. You had never realized that Zexion was fond of you when you were growing up. You didn’t even realize that Saix did either. Or Lea for that matter.

   Zexion looked away from you. “You don’t have to return the feelings. You probably don’t know or remember what love feels like.” 

   You blushed and looked away as well. “I...know what love is.”

    _“Why him?” Isa asked you as you stared at Axel trying to spar with Ventus. He had come back to see you guys quickly because he said he probably wouldn’t see you all again for a very long time._

_“What do you mean, Isa?” You looked away from the fight to face him._

_“You love Lea.” You gasped in shock then crossed your arms. You shook your head._

_“I do not.” You looked away from Isa to try and hide your blush. How did he know? How could he tell?_

_“Don’t lie to yourself, [Y/N].”_

   “[Y/N]?” Zexion waved a hand in front of your face to try and break you out of your trance. 

   “Ah! Zexion!” You slapped his hand away as you caught your breath. His hand as scared you once you came to.

   “You said you know what love is?” Zexion raised an eyebrow. You slowly nodded your head.

   “Y-yeah…” You could feel your cold cheeks heating up as a blush came to your face. “I guess...I could imagine being in love with you.” Zexion’s eyes got a little bit wide.

   “Thank you.” He smiled as he held one of your hands. You looked down at your intertwined fingers as you tried to think of what it would have been like if you and Ienzo could have normally grew up together, fell in love, got married, and had kids. It would have been the perfect story of childhood friends becoming forever lovers.

\-----

   “I’ve really missed you Roxas, you’re sort of all I got right now.” You said as you watched your feet dangle off the edge of the clocktower.

   “What about Demyx?” Roxas asked. You looked back up to him and raised an eyebrow.

   “Uh...what about Demyx?”

   “You went on a date with him. He was so happy about it.” Roxas waved around his ice cream before taking another bite out of it.

   “It was just for fun…” You trailed off before you realized what Roxas was saying. “Wait, are you jealous?” You asked. Roxas looked away and took a bite out of his ice cream to avoid the question. Just then, Xion walked into view and sat down in her spot on the clock tower.

   “Hey Xion!” Roxas said. You sighed.

   “Roxas, you’re avoiding the question.” You tugged on his hood.

   “Uh-oh, what did I walk into?” Xion asked as Roxas handed her an ice cream. 

   “Roxas is jealous that I went on a date with Demyx.” You explained.

   “Oooooh...what’s a date?” You sighed. Poor Xion still didn’t understand a lot of things about love or romantic things.

   “Something that I’m about to ask Roxas on.” You smirked. Roxas almost dropped his ice cream as he stammered.

   “I- Uh- Me- Date?!” He exclaimed. You nodded your head.

   “Why not?” You really didn’t have much left to lose with Axel being gone, Saix not talking to you normally, and Zexion who could disappear any day now.

   “Sure!” Roxas agreed.

   “Wait, but guys, I still don’t understand what a date is!”


	20. Chapter XX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finished KHIII 2 weeks ago and I’ve been letting it settle. I sobbed for hours. Also, I’m happy because of the way KHIII goes...the sequel I have planned for this story is going to go so great. Anyways, it’s been about a month since an update...I have an outline for this entire story but it’s been changing due to KHIII and my own preferences. I don’t want the reader to be a mary sue, but I also don’t want her to be useless so it’s hard to find that good between. Anyways, have fun. I hope you enjoy.

You looked around the kitchen seeing what was available for your use. You wanted to cook something, but you didn’t know what. You had the sudden urge to cook to relieve your stress. Today you had a date with Roxas, and you had many mixed feelings about it.

“Pasta, ice cream, pickles, peanuts, flour, eggs…” You closed the fridge and cabinets as you decided there was nothing left to cook. You walked over to the last cabinet and shut it slowly.

“Hey there.” You shrieked as you slammed the cabinet and held your heart. You backed up and held your chest where your heart would be. You stared at the hooded Organization member. That voice...

“Axel.” You said as he slowly took off his hood. You turned your head away from his gaze. “Why are you back?”

“I needed time, now I’m here.” He leaned against the fridge. “Look, we need to forget what happened.” Axel tried to catch your eyes. You averted from his gaze.

“You...you tried to eliminate Ienzo.”

“I’m always stuck with the icky jobs. Sometimes I don’t have a choice.” He tried to get closer to you. You took a few steps back from him.

“Who told you to?” You fought back tears. You didn’t want to look weak in front of this Axel. You loved Lea, not Axel.

“The Superior.” Axel’s eyes widened as he realized something. “We have to hurry!” He grabbed your hand and dragged your across the castle despite your protests. You tried to get out of his grip until you realized what he meant. 

“His...light is still on.” You said as you gazed into the portal that would lead to Zexion’s old room. 

“We have to destroy it.” Axel said. He summoned his chakrams in a flash of fire and gestured for you to stand back. When the flames cleared there was nothing left to see from the old portal. “[Y/N]...” Axel turned to you and tried to cup a hand to your cheek. 

“Why are you doing this? You’re so confusing!” You tried to turn to run away but Axel grabbed you by the wrist.

“[Y/N]! I never meant to hurt you. I would never…” He dropped to his knees. You slowly turned to see him on the floor, begging for forgiveness. “You don’t understand...I have to do all of these bad things…”

“What are you talking about?” You crouched down to Axel’s level. He let go of your wrist.

“There was a reason why Isa and I even applied to work for the castle. We found...someone there. They were imprisoned. We wanted to help. But they just...disappeared. It was like we imagined it.”

“They kept people hostage at the castle?” You asked. You couldn’t believe that Xemnas’ Somebody would do that to anyone.

“Yes. I’m trying to bring Isa up in the ranks to find out what happened. He’s hiding a lot from us.” Axel explained.

“Xemnas is?” You reached for Axel’s hand before you were interrupted. 

“Axel, you’ve returned.” You looked up to see Saix. You let go of Axel’s hand and confronted Saix.

“I’m sorry, Isa. I had no idea.” You tried to hug Saix but he disregarded your gesture.

“You told her?!” Saix exclaimed at Axel.

Axel nodded. “She had to know. She would have found out anyways.”

Saix sighed before embracing you. He ran his fingers through your hair. “I wanted to protect you from the truth. You didn’t need to get involved in our problems of the past.”

“I hate you.” You said as you pushed away from Saix. You turned to Axel. “I hate you too. You two didn’t trust me. I thought we were friends.”

“You didn’t remember anything for the longest time! You still don’t remember everything!” Axel shouted. Saix prepared to speak before you cut him off.

“I do remember. I remember that I loved you.” You turned around and began to walk to your portal, towards your room.

“[Y/N]!” Saix shouted as he tried to follow you. 

“Just...leave me alone for a while.” You disappeared into your room and created a barrier. You didn’t want anyone to bother you. You had a date to get ready for.

\-----

“So I should wear normal clothes under the coat?” Roxas asked. He was surprised to see that you weren’t wearing anything black underneath your coat as everyone else did.

“Yes, so you should go get changed then come back here.” You pushed Roxas out of your room.

“Um, okay then.” You shut the door and wondered how Roxas got through your barrier.

A little later Roxas came back with different clothes underneath his cloak.

“So where are we going, that I can dress normal?” Roxas asked.

“You’ll see.” You grabbed Roxas’s hand and led him through a dark corridor. You stepped out and were greeted by your old bush friend. You began to unzip your cloak then shove it under the bush.

“What are you doing?! Aren’t these supposed to protect us from the dark?” Roxas asked. You laughed.

“Just shove your cloak in the bush. There’s so much light in this world, we’ll be safe.” You took Roxas’ hand after he hid his cloak and led him into town.

“So what do we do here?” Roxas asked.

“We have fun.” You answered. You soon came to the ticket booth where you showed the attendant your passes. You led Roxas past the ticketbooth and in front of a tiny garden where he gasped.

“Whoa, what is this place?” Roxas said in awe as he looked at the flowers. He then noticed a tunnel that you could go through. He grabbed your hand and led you through. “Whoa!” Roxas exclaimed as the smells of good food and sweets sifted through the air. You smiled at his expressed then handed him a map.

“So where do you want to go first?” You asked. Roxas looked through the map.

“There’s a parade! And a pirate ship! There’s also fireworks and...what’s a roller coaster?” Roxas asked. You laughed at how excited he was.

“Look, if we stay right here the parade will start soon.”

“Is that why all of these people are sitting?” Roxas asked. You nodded and sat down next to some people who were waiting. You gestured for Roxas to sit next to you. He shook his head.

“Do they have ice cream? I should get some while we wait.” You were slightly shocked that Roxas suddenly took the reins on the date. You nodded and pointed over to an ice cream shop across the way. Roxas waved to you as he walked towards the store and inside. You distracted yourself by playing with the pockets on your normal clothes. Soon Roxas sat down beside you and handed you a spoon. “We’re sharing.” He said.

You took a spoonful of ice cream and ate it. You went in for another spoon, but Roxas took the spoon from you. “We’re sharing the same spoon too?” You asked.

“Yup.” Roxas smiled. He already had chocolate on his face. You pointed it out and he licked his lips. The ice cream was soon finished and the parade music began to play. The two of you watched as people sang and danced around the main street. At some point in the parade one of the dancers handed Roxas a flower. They gestured for Roxas to give you the flower. The two of you giggled as the dancer looked satisfied when Roxas gave you the flower. When the parade was over the two of you stood up and stretched your legs out.

“Ah, that was so embarrassing for me.” Roxas said as he held his red cheeks. You brought out the map to try to get his mind off of it.

“Where should we go now?”

\-----

“I can’t believe everything that we’ve done in just a day!” Roxas exclaimed as the two of you waited for the fireworks. You were sitting next to the bush just outside of town where your cloaks were. “The pirate ship, the roller coasters, the food shaped in that mouse’s head!” Suddenly a firework went off and Roxas was distracted from summarizing the day. You watched Roxas as he looked at the fireworks.

Was this wrong? You weren’t sure if the small age gap was weird. Roxas also didn’t remember anything about his past of being Sora. He also didn’t know that Axel was back because you forgot to tell him.

“Hey Roxas?” You asked.

“Yeah?” He answered, not taking his eyes off of the fireworks.

“Axel is back.”

“He’s what?!”

\-----

“I can’t wait to tell him about our date!” Roxas said as he giddily walked through the dark corridor back home with you. You stepped out into the Proof of Existence. You gestured towards his room. “I knew he wasn’t gone.” Roxas smiled as Axel’s light continued to illuminate on his portal.

“I had fun, Roxas.” You smiled at him. He nodded.

“Yeah, me too.” Roxas gave you a hug before walked into Axel’s room. You sighed and turned around. You stood in front of the portal of your room. You then looked up to see Saix’s portal. You walked over and walked in.

“Isa?” You asked. You slowly walked in to see Saix looking up to the empty sky.

“I was jealous.” Saix said as he turned to face you. You could feel your cheeks turn red.

“What?” You asked. Saix walked closer to you and put a finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“You loved Lea when you had a heart.” He let go of your chin and his hand fell back to his side. “Then you went on a date with Demyx in this life. Are you truly still capable of loving? Do you still love Lea?” 

“I…” You trailed off. Did you love anyone in this life, truly? What about Zexion, he had confessed to you just the other day. “Are you capable of loving in this life, Isa?” 

Saix looked surprised for a moment before he wrapped his arms around you. 

“Yes.”


	21. Chapter XXI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is...a lot to take in. It’s a little sudden but it’s where this story has to start heading now.

You watched from the ground as Zexion shielded you from the blast with his own body. You reached an arm out to try and grab onto him. He summoned his Lexicon to try blocking the attack. He said a few words before a blast came from his book and hit your heartless. Zexion cried out as he used his entire being into the force of the attack. He collapsed to the floor as your heartless escaped through a dark corridor. 

You crawled over to Zexion as he began to fade away. Tears immediately rushed from your eyes as you held one of his hands and cupped his face with your other hand. 

“Ienzo…” You whispered through sobs. Zexion gave a small smile and lifted up a hand to your cheek. You took your hand away from his cheek to cup his hand against your cheek. He gently tried to wipe a few tears away, but it was a never ending stream.

“[Y/N]...” Zexion gently pulled your face down to give your lips a tender and weak kiss. The kiss turned into an embrace as Zexion slowly disappeared from your arms. You cried out loud and slammed your fists against the ground as you screamed in frustration.

He was gone.

\-----

“It’s an unpredictable phenomenon really.” Zexion said as he finished explaining. He has just told you that against the almost impossible odds, you had a humanoid heartless. There was only one other case of this known. Zexion has figured that if your heartless was defeated, then you would be whole again.

“So where do I find it...er- her?” You asked. Zexion shook his head.

“She could really be anywhere by now. I had seen her wandering in front of the house, but when I tried to chase her down she has disappeared into a corridor.” Zexion walked up to you and took one of your hands in his. “Please, be careful. These type of heartless are extremely powerful.

“I’ll be fine.” You smiled before hugging Zexion and setting off to find your heartless.

After a while of searching around your old world, you decided to call it a day and went back to the castle. You slumped in your bed. You hadn’t been on many missions lately, so you had plenty of time to look, but also no idea where to look. 

‘Should I tell anyone else?’ You thought. You shook your head and decided to protect your friends from the danger of your own heartless. You felt that it was your responsibility to eliminate her.

“[Y/N]?” You heard. Your eyes fluttered open as you sat up to see who it was who had invaded your privacy in your own room.

“Axel?” You crossed your arms around your chest.

“Are you...okay?” He asked. 

“I could be much better.” You scoffed. Axel scratched the back of his head.

“Look...I’m really sorry and I don’t have many idea on how to make it up, but can you leave this Saturday open for me?”

“I don’t know, can I?” You said. Axel sighed.

“Please?”

“Fine.” Axel smiled.

“Thank you, [Y/N]. Is...he okay?” He meant Zexion.

“Ienzo is fine. Thanks for asking.” You uncrossed your arms. “Thanks for...thinking about his portal. I would have never thought about that.”

“It was...nothing.” Axel said before leaving your room. You laid back on your bed and wiped a tear. 

‘Imagine their faces when I get my heart back.’ You thought

\-----  
A few days passed with no luck of finding her. All of the worlds you had already been to with the Organization had been searched. You only had one option left. You had to go back and check your home world again.

“Ienzo, I’m back.” You said as you walked through a dark corridor that led to your house. Zexion looked up from the lab where he had been mixing experiments.

“Hello, [Y/N]. Any luck?” Zexion gently put down his things and walked over to give you a hug and a kiss on the forehead.

“Um...no luck so far.” You said as you blushed into the forehead kiss. “I was going to check around here again.”

“I see, be careful out there.” Zexion turned around and grabbed a bottle of something and handed it to you. “Here, it’ll increase your strength for a while.” You took it and smiled.

“Thanks, Ienzo.” You then walked out of your house and began your search.

You climbed to the top on your house then to the top of the house next to yours. You continued to climb rooftops until you were satisfied with the height. You looked around then drank what was in the bottle that Zexion has gave to you. You made a face at the gross taste of the liquid then threw the bottle.

You squinted as you looked into town to see one of your rival Moogles talking to someone.

“No way it was that easy.” You said as you realized the Moogle was talking to you. You jumped down from the roof you were on to make your way into town. You ran as you followed a dark wisp that you saw in the air. You kept following these wisps until you were at the waterfall ruins. You remembered how beautiful this district used to be. You admired the ruins for a while, almost forgetting what you were here for.

“I can’t believe you’re that stupid.” You turned around to be faced with yourself. She chuckled as your eyes met.

“I can’t believe you exist.” You summoned your blade. She rolled her eyes. She summoned her weapon. Your eyes widened in shock as you stared at her keyblade. “What?!”

“You’re weak.” She said before rushing towards you in a flurry of attacks. You were easily taken down. You quickly got back up and rushed to block her attacks. You had almost failed every block and ended up almost running away from her.

‘I can’t believe how strong she is...I don’t think I can do this.’ You thought as you ran away from her attacks. She would not stop laughing.

“You really thought that you could beat me?” She scoffed. She rushed you again until you were on the ground. You held up your blade in defense as she prepare to finish you off. You winced, yet nothing hit you. You look up to see Zexion.

You watched from the ground as Zexion shielded you from the blast with his own body. You reached an arm out to try and grab onto him. He summoned his Lexicon to try blocking the attack. He said a few words before a blast came from his book and hit your heartless. Zexion cried out as he used his entire being into the force of the attack. He collapsed to the floor as your heartless escaped through a dark corridor. 

You crawled over to Zexion as he began to fade away. Tears immediately rushed from your eyes as you held one of his hands and cupped his face with your other hand. 

“Ienzo…” You whispered through sobs. Zexion gave a small smile and lifted up a hand to your cheek. You took your hand away from his cheek to cup his hand against your cheek. He gently tried to wipe a few tears away, but it was a never ending stream.

“[Y/N]...” Zexion gently pulled your face down to give your lips a tender and weak kiss. The kiss turned into an embrace as Zexion slowly disappeared from your arms. You cried out loud and slammed your fists against the ground as you screamed in frustration.

He was gone.


	22. Chapter XXII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As stated before, this fanfiction is to follow the storyline of the game as much as I can make it happen. So um...one down. You know what happens. Sorry it’s a little short this time around.

You had to keep it to yourself. You couldn’t share these dark feelings with you friends or those you cared dearly for. You felt more hollow than usual. Were you in love? Maybe.

Zexion’s death is what Xemnas wanted, and he eventually got it. You didn’t understand why though. Why did he think he was a traitor? You were too scared to ask Saix or Axel about it. You knew they were still not telling you everything. Then again, you didn’t really give them much of an opportunity to tell you everything.

You finally opened your eyes and looked around. You had been sitting in Zexion’s library for a while now. You were past crying and felt lost. You never got any important missions anyways, so you had plenty of time to mourn. You closed your eyes and leaned your head slightly back as you took in the scent of books.

“[Y/N]! There you are.” You took a sharp breath at the sound of your name. You didn’t know if you were ready to face anyone else right now. You opened your eyes to see Demyx looking down at you from your spot on the ground.

You didn’t respond. You only stared into the brightness of his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. You couldn’t break eye contact with Demyx. “Is it...Zexion? He’s been terminated for a while now, huh? He was your friend before, right?” You shook your head yes. If only Demyx knew that “a while” was closer than he thought.

“Well, it’s probably not the best time then to tell you…” He finally looked away from you and began to scratch the back of his head.

“What?” You finally mustered a word. You were surprised that you didn’t chole back into tears. You were truly empty.

“I had a new date idea, if you’re up for it?” He asked. You sighed. You had totally forgotten about your current courtships. You had a date with Axel tomorrow. You just had one with Roxas. Guilt began to sink into you. It stung. Was it right to take Roxas on the same first date as Demyx did?

“Where?” You asked. Demyx twiddled his thumbs for a bit.

“Well, I’ve had to keep recon on this world lately and it has this really nice restaurant but…” Demyx crossed his arms. “Is it okay if we don’t eat at the restaurant? There’s a really nice mountainside with a great view where we can set up a picnic.”

“Demyx? Have you ever felt love? As a Somebody?” You asked. Demyx looked shocked for a second before he finally sat down next to you.

“Does this have to do with Zexion?” He asked. You slowly nodded. Demyx gently put an arm around your shoulder.

“I’m really sorry that he’s gone. I’m sure he loved you too.” Demyx took his arm away. “I should go now, huh?” He got up and began to leave. You didn’t call out for him, but you watched him as he left the library.

He never answered your question. 

\-----

You had no idea how much time had went by, but you finally stood up. You took one last look at the shelves filled with different pages of different genres before turning away and not looking back. You continued to walk down the halls of the castle until you saw someone else walking towards you. You stopped and let them come to you.

“Saix.” You said as he stopped in front of you. He gave a small smile but it faded away as he realized something was wrong.

“What happened, [Y/N]?” He asked.

And then you started to fall apart. You grabbed onto his hand as your knees hit the floor and tears slid down your cheeks. Saix lightly gasped before picking you up from the floor. You leaned against him as the tears kept flowing down. Saix created a dark corridor and led you through it. On the other side was his room where he sat you down at the foot of his bed. He sat next to you as you began to sniffle and wiped the tears away.

“Once again, what happened?” Saix asked. You stared at your fists as they began to scrunch up your coat.

“I don’t want to worry you. It’s so many things.” You continued to stare at your fists. Saix took one of your hands and held it with both of his. You looked up at him and for a split second you could imagine his vibrant green eyes. You reached up as if to touch them, but pulled back. “What happened to them?” You asked.

“What happened to you?” Saix asked. You continued to stare at his eyes, not saying anything. He finally gave in. “I’m not myself anymore. I had to...take this form in order to become closer to the truth. Sometimes, I’m not myself.” You still didn’t understand fully, but it was better than the secrets he kept with Axel.

“There’s something out there. It’s...me” You said. Saix gave a confused look. “I have a heartless and she’s so powerful. I couldn’t beat her. I...I let Ienzo die for me.” The words felt horrible to say out loud. Saix embraced you.

“I’m sorry for your loss. I know you had a dream of us all being together.” You nodded your head as you quietly sobbed into his chest. Saix ran his fingers through your hair repeatedly to try and comfort you. “I’ll send a report to watch out for...her.” Saix suggested.

“Please, don’t.” You said. “I don’t want anyone else getting hurt.”

“Our numbers have been cut in half, but we still have one through three. If Axel or I can’t handle it, certainly the top three could.”

“I hope you’re right.” You answered. “Fine...go ahead and issue a report.”

“It can wait.” Saix smiled as he laid you down next to him on his bed. The two of you stared at each other for a while as Saix smiled. “I used to dream of moments like these.”

“I’m sorry.” You looked away from Saix’s face. “You loved me all this time even though you knew I loved Lea.”

Saix shook his head. “Loving you is not a waste.” 

“I forgot everything.” You gave a light chuckle. “In the end...I guess I loved Ienzo all along.” You looked up to see Saix frown.

“Are you sure?” Saix reached out to touch your cheek.

“What are you trying to say?” You asked. You moved his hand away.

“Nothing.” Saix proceeded to hold you in his arms. You let the exhaustion from crying lull you to sleep. Saix looked down at your sleeping face. Your eyes were puffy and swollen. He gently ran a finger over your eyelashes and smiled as you slightly stirred in your sleep. 

“I know you love me now.”


	23. Chapter XXIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments really keep me going on writing fanfiction. I love pleasing a crowd or knowing that I'm not the only one who likes my writing.

You slowly woke up to the sound of snoring coming next to you. Slowly you began to rub your eyes before realizing where you were. You looked over to see Saix sound asleep, even though Nobodies didn’t really need to sleep. Some of his blue hair was covering his face. You gently brushed it aside and smiled. You then got up steadily, trying not to wake him.

‘I kinda feel bad leaving him here just like last time.’ You created a dark corridor to take yourself to your own room. You laid down on your bed and thought about the events that had occurred this week. That’s when you remembered that you had a date today with Axel. 

You weren’t sure what to do. You didn’t want Axel to see that you were feeling bad. You also didn’t know if you could actually have real fun going somewhere with him. Were you even supposed to wear anything special under this coat? You didn’t have the slightest idea on where he would take you. You rolled over in bed, wishing you had a window to look outside. 

“[Y/N]? Are you in here?” You turned around to see Axel walk in. He began to lean against your wall.

“Why are you here so early?” You asked. Axel chuckled.

“It’s always night here. Are you ready to go?” You got up, knowing very well that you still had a bedhead. “Whoa, don’t wake up on the wrong side now.” Axel said. You rolled your eyes.

“Is the coat okay? Where are we going?” You asked. You went to get your brush from your bathroom to quickly fix the bird nest that your hair had become. 

“It’s fine, but you might want to put the hood up at first.” Axel put on his hood then created a dark corridor. “Ready?” He held out his hand for you to take. You reached out for it and hesitated for a second before taking it. Axel led you through while covering your eyes by pulling your hood down more than it was supposed to.

“Hey?! What are you doing, Axel?!” You exclaimed. 

“It’s a surprise.” He said. You could feel him guide you to sit down somewhere before he removed your hood from your eyes. He then took off your hood followed by his. “So?” He asked. You looked around to see that you were on a rooftop back in your homeworld. Axel had a nice breakfast on a small white table with candles lit. You were both sitting in nice outside type white chairs. It was still dark outside, but in the horizon you could see a few colors trying to peak out from behind variou roofs and hills. 

“Sunrise?” You questioned. Axel nodded. He gestured for you to eat. You looked down to see [favorite breakfast]. “Did you buy this?” You asked.

“I made it myself!” He exclaimed, obviously offended. “It took me a while too.” You took a bite and it actually wasn’t bad. 

“It’s good...but why did you do this?” You looked again to the horizon to see the sunrise coming up ever so slowly.

“I’m not going to sugarcoat it. I’m sorry for Castle Oblivion. My orders were to take out various members and Zexion happened to be one of them. I had no choice. I didn’t even consider you. I was more concerned with finding the girl I told you about. The more I follow the rules here, the closer Saix gets to finding out about her. We have to know what happened to her. She was being held prisoner. What if he still has her locked up somewhere? Cold, scared, alone. What if that were you? I’d never forgive myself.” Axel explained.

“Zexion is dead.” You stated. Axel’s eyes widened. Suddenly the last few bites of food left were no longer appetizing. Axel stood up and walked over to you. He bent over to give you a hug.

“[Y/N]...I’m so sorry. Did he find him?” Axel asked. You could feel tears coming up, but you blinked them away. You stood up as Axel continued to hold you. You then pushed him away. 

“It was me.” Axel stared at you in disbelief. He gestured for you to sit down on the edge of the roof with him. You followed. “I have a heartless. She’s too powerful for me. Saix should be sending out a warning about her soon to the rest of the Organization. She’s dangerous. I don’t know what she wants with me.”

“To be whole again.” Axel looked to you. “She needs to be defeated. If she is, then you have a chance.” 

“A chance?” You questioned. You stared into Axel's eyes trying to make out what he was saying.

“To be whole again. If your heart is released and you're there, maybe it'll return to you.” Axel held your hands in his.

“I don't feel any different.” You admitted. Axel raised an eyebrow. “My heart...it doesn't feel gone.” You took a hand away from Axel and put it up to your chest. “It's like I can feel so much. If these are all just memories of emotion, then I don't mind not having a heart.” 

“Are you sure?” Axel asked. You nodded your head. “So you do remember everything now?” Axel placed his vacant hand on your shoulder. 

“I remember...a lot.” You finally broke eye contact with Axel and looked away. You felt his hand on your chin forcing you to look into his eyes.

“I knew as we got older. Isa had fallen for you a long time before we started at the castle or you went off to synthesis school. But you...I finally realized it just as it became harder to see you.” Axel reached into his pocket and pulled out your various notes to him. “It's hidden in these.” He shuffled through them a bit before putting them away. “But I couldn't do that to Isa. I couldn't take you away from him. So I figured we were all fine the way we were. Maybe it would have been different if we found her…” 

“The girl who was trapped?” You asked. Axel nodded. You weren't sure why he was summarizing everything.

“Do you still feel the same? Or did I mess that up after what I did to Zexion?” Axel asked. 

“I'm...conflicted.” You admitted. It seemed a little too soon to think about others after you had lost one of the loves of your life. “I mean...I believe that I've loved all of you. It just doesn't feel right to immediately move on. Ienzo was my oldest friend. Reuniting with him was one of the best feelings ever. I didn't feel alone anymore. My past finally gained some clarity. But he's gone...how long should I mourn? I know I have to move on, but how do I know when it's been enough time?” You looked up to see that Axel's eyes were tearing up. You reached out to wipe them away, but he looked away as he blinked.

“I never said how I felt.” Axel said when he turned his head back to you.

“How do you feel?” You then remembered a very important question. “Axel? Have you ever felt love as a Somebody?” He smiled as he cupped your cheek in his hand. You leaned into the chill of his leather glove, closing your eyes.

“Of course.” You then felt his breath close to your face. You opened your eyes to be met by his vibrant green ones. He closed his eyes and began to lean forward. He hovered just in front of your lips as you decided what to do. He must have been waiting for you to decide. You took a deep breath then closed your eyes. You pushed your head forward to meet his lips.

You thought that you would be left with more of a spark. Maybe remembering your love for him wasn't enough. In this life Axel has been a good friend to you, but he has also betreayed you by disregarding your pleas and trying to eliminate Zexion. Of course he apologized, but it still didn't feel right. But you didn't want him to know that.

You pulled away then buried your face into his chest. You felt him run his fingers through your hair and trace circles into your back. Wasn't this what your Somebody always wanted? It didn't feel right as a Nobody. But you still sat there and shared a quiet moment with him before the two of you decided to go back to the castle.

\-----

You had been laying in your bed for a while as you processed the events with Axel. You didn't know what you wanted as a Nobody. You had options, but was it right to explore them? You didn't even know what Axel thought about you two now. Once again you wished that you had a window to look out of. 

You created a dark corridor underneath you, hoping that it could lead to into a new direction. You felt the ripples of a waterbed. You opened your eyes to find yourself in Demyx's room. He was in the corner tuning his sitar. He hadn't noticed you yet.

“Demyx.” You said. He jumped up a little before turning to see you. His face lit up with a smile. 

“[Y/N]! What are you doing here?” Demyx summoned his sitar away and approached you. He sat at the end of his bed. 

“You had a date planned?” Demyx got up and started running around the room gathering a few things.

“Did you want to go now?” He said as he picked up a basket. “I found the picnic basket!” You watched as he grabbed some other things and stuffed it into the basket. When he was done he lent you a hand to help you up. You took it, but did not let go after you were off of his bed. Demyx smiled down at your hand before creating a dark corridor. He led you through and asked you to close your eyes.

“Okay, can you wait here and set out this sheet?” He asked as he handed you a picnic blanket. You were on top of a very high up mountain. There was an apple tree next to you and some lush green grass beneath you. You grabbed the blanket.

“Where are you going?” You asked.

“I'll be right back with the food!” Demyx then created another dark corridor and disappeared. You set out the blanket then sat on it. You thought for a while on if this was the right choice. I'd you didn't feel right, then were you just leading him on? What if he found out about your other dates with Roxas and Axel?

Soon, Demyx was back with food filled in the picnic basket. He set it down then started to hand things to you. All of the food looked really good and had a great variety of flavors. You saw many things you had never ate before when you were a Somebody.

“Go ahead and eat up.” Demyx said. You started trying the various foods and we're met with new flavors that you didn't know existed.

“What kind of world is this?” You asked.

“It's the world I've been assigned to. I have a lot of work to do here. Do you think that you could help me sometimes?” You finished the food on your plate and nodded. “Work is always easier when you're there with me.” Soon most of the food was gone. The two of you looked out into the horizon of mountains and city that looked so tiny from where you were.

“You never answered my question the other day.” Demyx looked at you with a confused look. “Have you ever felt love as a Somebody?” You asked. Demyx seemed to tense up before answering. He looked into your eyes and took a breath before replying.

“I didn't know you as a Somebody.”

“Oh.” You replied before looking away. Suddenly the picnic blanket had become very interesting.

“Of course you have. What's it like?” He asked. You continued to look away from him.

“It's a feeling of wanting to protect someone. You wouldn't care about what happened to you as long as it meant the happiness and well being of the person you loved.” You thought back to Zexion first jumping in front of you to shield the attack. He must have loved you a lot to not even think before leaping.

“I hope I can learn more about it from you.” Demyx said. The two of you sat in silence for a while before heading back to the castle. You held hands once again through the dark corridor.

\-----

You wandered the halls of the castle aimlessly as you were in deep thought. You were in conflict with yourself. You were worried about your heartless wandering the unknown. You were also worried about this girl that Axel and Saix were trying to find. You wondered if there were any war that you could help.

“Oh, [Y/N]!” You saw Roxas walking towards you. You waited as he approached you. “I haven’t seen you around for a while. Where have you been?”

“I’ve been around.” You awkwardly cleared your throat. “Roxas, are you sure that you don’t remember anything as a Somebody?” You asked. You then felt a hand wrap around your upper arm and slightly pull you back. You saw that it was Saix.

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to borrow [Y/N] for a moment.” Saix then walked away with you. He moved his hand from your arm to your back. After you were far away enough he spoke. “We can’t let Roxas know about his past.”

“Why? That’s stupid. He should at least know his real name.” You said.

“It’s dangerous. You want to protect him from Riku, don’t you?” You thought back to the name that Zexion had warned you about. Riku wore the coat and posed to be apart of the Organization, but he was only interested in ruining missions.

“Will he ever know?” You looked up into his eyes.

“I think not.”


	24. Chapter XXIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this whole story planned out...but I’m a little unhappy at the lack of romance in the coming chapters. I’ve taken some time to revise my outline to include more romance (as well as loss.) Anyways, I’ve been waiting for this chapter for so long you have no idea.
> 
> Comments really keep me going on writing fanfiction. I love pleasing a crowd or knowing that I'm not the only one who likes my writing.

Everything was empty in the meeting room. All of the seats were vacant in the silence of the white room. Two dark corridors appeared. One on the highest seat and another on the floor. You looked up to Xemnas with concern in your eyes. His orange eyes seemed to pierce into your being.

“Why have you called me here?” You asked. You had felt anger and remorse for Xemnas. He had made you experiment on your friends which caused Saix to become angry. You were still no better as you were still courting multiple members at the same time. In the end, he was still your boss and you had to respect his wishes to become whole. You wondered often if you cared about being a Somebody again. You know that it means almost everything to your friends, so if not for you then you will do it for them.

“Your heartless defeated Number VI.” Xemnas stated. How did he know that? You thought that Axel had covered up the information. Who could have said something? It couldn’t have been Saix.

“Number II has kept you quite close lately.” You looked away from The Superior’s gaze as you realized Xigbar wasn’t someone you could trust. “If your heartless has the power to defeat one of us, then what could you be capable of?” You looked up to see Xemnas pointing at you. 

“I never even go on missions anymore.” You said. “I’m...weak.” 

“[Y/N]. The Toxic Synthesis. Number VI.” Your eyes widened. Number Six? That was higher than Saix and Axel. And with most of the members defeated, that would technically make you the fourth person in charge. 

“I’m sorry sir, I don’t think I understand.” 

“You have proven your worth to take a seat. If your heartless is finally defeated, who knows how much stronger you’ll become? Maybe you could move up further in our ranks.” Xemnas invited you to take a seat in the sixth chair. You used a dark corridor to help yourself up. You felt awkward being close enough to see more than his eyes. He was very intimidating.

“Now tell me. About the three boys. Ienzo, Lea, and Isa.” Why would he want to know about that for? Didn’t he know them when he was a Somebody?

“Ienzo was my friend for a long time before he went to the castle. We played together then rarely saw each other when he became an apprentice.” It felt so wrong being in his seat. But you would honor this spot for him. “Isa and Lea became my friends shortly after Ienzo left. We got into all kinds of trouble but also had a lot of fun together. Then one day I left to synthesis school and they left to be apprentices. I hardly saw them when I came back and opened up my shop. I slowly went through life thinking I would never see them again after the castle became abandoned.”

Xemnas sighed. “How bittersweet to meet your friends again” He seemed to be disappointed, but also deep in thought. “You will have a mission soon. You are excused.” You created a dark corridor and left the room. In the seat next to Xemnas came another dark corridor.

“No sign of a keyblade, huh?” Xigbar leaned back in his chair. “Maybe if we defeat her heartless, she’ll be able to wield it?”

“Her heart cannot be released without a keyblade. Bring Number XIII. Immediate action should be taken.” Xemnas said. Xigbar shook his head before leaving to find you and Roxas.

\-----

You felt someone grab your arm and begin to drag you away. You looked up to see Xigbar. He created a dark corridor and looked down at you before walking through.

“Meeting time, toots. Hop to it.” He then threw you into the portal and walked in after you. You fell through and appeared in your seat. You heard gasps as you realized you were the last one to appear. You then saw Xigbar appear in his seat. Make that second to last. 

“What is the meaning of this?” You looked over to see Saix questioning your position.

“[Y/N] has been promoted to Number VI.” Xemnas announced. You heard a few others begin to whisper.

“But that’s higher than me.” Axel said.

“Looks like you’re taking orders from your old girlfriend now.” You looked over to see Xigbar smirking.

“Number VI has proven herself to be strong enough to take the title of fourth in charge. After all, she can wield a keyblade.” Xemnas stated. More whispered began.

“I’ve never seen her with a keyblade.” Demyx said. He seemed a little annoyed.

“I have.” You said. Everyone looked at you in question. “My heartless. She has it.”

“And if we can defeat her heartless, then we’ll have another keyblade wielder to collect hearts.” Xigbar said. It all started to become clear to you now. You still had no idea why you had a keyblade in the first place. “Roxas, [Y/N], let’s go defeat that heartless now, shall we?” Xigbar used a dark corridor to disappear from the room. 

You looked to Roxas to see a determined look on his face. He locked eyes with you and nodded, as if to say he would help. He then created a dark corridor and disappeared. You followed his move and left the room. You found yourself in the departure room.

“Ready?” Xigbar asked. You and Roxas nodded as he created a dark corridor. The three of you entered.

\-----

“Where could she be?” Roxas whined. You had looked around a couple of worlds by now and you were starting to give up hope. He looked to you, hoping that you had an idea.

“She was...in Radiant Garden the last time I saw her.” 

“Well we’re here, where could she be?’ Xigbar asked.

You thought for a while. Thinking what her motives could be at this point.

“I have an idea.”

\-----

You stood in front of the door to your old shop. You were too frightened to open it. You were scared that if she was in there, she would only take away another person from you.

“Well?” Xigbar asked. You shook your head and took a step back.

“I can’t.” Xigbar walked past you and opened the door, his guns in hand. He slowly began to walk in and motions for the two of you to come inside before he took a step back to dodge an attack.

“She’s here.” Roxas said. He ran into the shop. You panicked for a moment before summoning your blade. You heard grunts and weapons clashing. You were frozen. You didn’t know how much time had passed before you finally walked in. You were met with Xigbar holding his gun to your heartless’ head. 

“Roxas, now!” Xigbar shouted. Roxas began to rush towards your heartless. You saw her smirk before she walked back into a dark corridor that she has quickly created. Your breath got stuck in your throat before you heard Xigbar and Roxas cry out to you. You quickly turned around to have your sword clash with her keyblade.

“That’s mine!” You shouted. You pushed her with your sword and she took a few steps back.

“You want it?” She taunted. You grit your teeth in anger as tears flowed out of your eyes. Ienzo had died protecting you from her before. You couldn’t be weak now. “Aww, you miss little Ienzo? He was weak.” She spit back at you.

In a sudden motion Xigbar appeared behind your heartless upside down and shot her in the hand. She dropped the keyblade and Roxas rushed to slide and grab it. He had successfully retrieved it. She growled in anger.

“Too slow.” Xigbar said. He grabbed your keyblade from Roxas then appeared next to you to hand it to you. You grabbed the keyblade in awe and dropped your sword. How could you even wield it?

“Big mistake.” You heard. You looked to see your heartless slide down to grab your sword then lift herself up to clash it against your keyblade. You saw Roxas running towards her only to be met with a quick burst of dark fire from her hand. Roxas fell to the floor.

“Give it back.” You heartless said. You shook your head. She backed off and tried to summon the keyblade. To her dismay, she was met with nothing. “What?!” She screeched.

“It’s hers now.” Xigbar smirked. “And now you’re done.” He pointed his gun to her.

“Fine. You can have it.” She snarled before escaping into a dark corridor.

“She’s gone.” Roxas said as he tried to get up from the ground. You rushed to his side to help him up. 

“Are you okay?” You asked. Roxas shook his head yes.

“Are YOU okay? You have a keyblade!” Roxas said. He seemed very excited.

“I wonder why…” You said as you stared at it. It looked nothing like Roxas or Xion’s keyblade. It was purple at the handle and silver leading up to a star at the end. “Starlight?” You questioned. “I think...that’s its name.”

“Try a poison spell! You must be so much stronger now!” Roxas jumped up and down.

You looked to Xigbar at the mention of a poison spell.

“Don’t even think about it.” He scoffed.

\-----

“Little miss keyblade, huh?” You sat at the clock tower in Twilight Town. You were alone on the ledge until you heard Axel’s voice. He sat next to you. He handed you an ice cream. You took it.

“I guess so...but, why?” You asked. Axel shrugged his shoulders.

“Beats me.” He said. He took a bite out of his ice cream.

“I have an idea.” You looked to see Saix. He sat down next to you on your other side. You raised an eyebrow. He never came here. “Remember Ventus?”

“Yeah, I do. Sorta.” You said.

“He looks a lot like Roxas.” Axel said. He them covered his mouth. “I didn’t mean to say that. I don’t want the kid to know.”

“You secret is safe with me.” You said. You then began to think about Ventus’ face and how it used to be so blurry in your mind before. You thought about Ventus with Roxas’ face and it just seemed to perfectly click. “What about Ventus?” You looked to Saix again.

“I think he bequeathed you.” Saix said.

“What’s bequeath?” You and Axel asked in unison.

“Don’t you ever read the research reports from the Superior or Vexen?” Saix shook his head. “Bequeathing is when a keyblade wielder passes on the ability to wield to someone. Usually you have to touch their keyblade. [Y/N], you were the only one who had touched Ventus’s keyblade, do you remember?”

“Right, he dropped it in that spar with me then you threw it back to him.” Axel said. You began to remember the event clearly. You had indeed touched the keyblade.

“So it was an accident?” You said. You giggled at the thought. You had finished your ice cream and looked to see an empty stick with no winner.

“Guys.” This clock tower was too crowded today. You looked up to the new voice. It was Roxas. He seemed distressed. “Xion won’t wake up.”


	25. Chapter XXV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I remember when I first started to write this a few years ago when I was fifteen this was supposed to be one of those shitty funny reverse harem fanfictions. You know, the kind that make you cringe because everyone is out of character and the reader is a mary sue. When I picked this back up, I realized that I needed to create an actual plot and character development to allow certain interactions and emotions to happen without anyone being out of character. I’m happy with the outcome, but the outline of this fanfiction has become very dark. Especially since it follows the games. So this is a warning. From here on out, there will be more character “deaths” and intensity. I kinda hate to do it, but you know what’s going to happen. All I have to say is...good luck Sora and Riku. (I’m a huge Riku fangirl btw.)
> 
> And as always, comments help me to keep writing. I appreciate the hearts/likes/favorites and the amazing amount of reads I’ve been getting, but I value comments the most. They let me peer into the minds of my readers and allow me to see what little details I can adjust here and there to keep you reading.

Xion laid in her bed motionless. Next to her pillow was a seashell, you wondered who could have put it there. You hadn’t spent a whole lot of time with her, but she felt like a little sister to you. Sometimes you could vent to Xion without mentioning any names and she would take it in as if it were a story. She was very optimistic, but lately she has been a little distant.

You extended your hand towards her to touch her hair. You gave her a half hearted smile as you pulled your hand away.

“Wake up soon.” You said. You began to stare at the seashell on her bed. It must have been Roxas. 

“What a shame.” You looked up to see Saix. He stood next to you at the edge of Xion’s bed. “Useless puppet.”

“Excuse me?” You said. You looked him in the eyes. “Xion isn’t a puppet!” You sternly said.

“[Y/N], you’re fourth in charge. There are things you must know by now.” Saix said. He motioned for you to follow him out of Xion’s room. The two of you walked towards the kitchen then sat down at the empty table. 

“Is Xion...really a puppet?” You questioned. Saix nodded.

“She was created by Vexen in Castle Oblivion. She is here to duplicate Roxas’ powers. But she keeps failing missions. She’s become useless to us.” Saix explained.

“What are we going to do with her? She’s...important to some of us.” You thought about Roxas and Axel and how much closer they were to Xion.

“If needed, she will be eliminated. We still have Roxas, of course. And now you.”

“Is this all about the keyblade?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Precisely, it is what shall make us whole again.” Saix seemed to be looking off into the distance. 

“You want to be whole again? Will it help you find that girl?” You asked. You wondered what she looked like. What did she mean to Saix and Axel? 

“I believe becoming whole will help with many things.” Saix took a hold of your hand in his. “Sometimes, I forget how to love and I blame it on the absence of my heart.” 

“I don’t know what I think about being whole again, but I know it means a lot to you and Axel. I’ll help you two no matter what. I can’t lose you too.” You got up from the table. “Xigbar told Xemnas about Zexion. I think it’s time that for the truth to come out.”

\-----

“So you hid Zexion at your old house, your heartless killed him, then you took back your keyblade?” Demyx summarized what you had just confessed. The two of you were in his room. You were sitting on his bed while he was sitting in his special music chair. It helped his with his posture as he played.

“Do you have to say the word kill?” You said. “I mean that is the story. He was my friend and he sacrificed himself for me. Now I have his number, so I need to do my best to honor him. Maybe I could bring him back if we collect enough hearts.” 

“How did your heartless even get a keyblade?” Demyx asked.

“I think my heart wasn’t strong enough as a Somebody to wield it. I never would have thought that I could have either. I only ever met one keyblade wielder a long time ago. I think he’s the reason why.” You explained. Demyx scratched his head for a moment.

“So since your heartless is, well evil, does that mean your keyblade thought you were finally ready after your heart fell to darkness?” Demyx then swatted the air. “Probably not, I’m just spewing out dumb things.”

“That...actually makes a lot of sense, Demyx.” Demyx grew a huge smile on his face.

“See? I can be smart when I want to be!” You rolled your eyes and got up. You tasseled his hair before leaving his room.

\-----

“Roxas, can I take you somewhere? It’s not far.” You extended a hand to him as he was sitting on a couch. He took it and pulled himself up.

“Like another date?” He asked. His face perked up.

“Sorta.” You created a dark corridor and motioned for him to follow you in. The two of you stood in front of Memory’s Skyscraper. “Have you ever been outside of the castle?” You asked.

“No, I haven’t really explored our world before.” Roxas was slowly spinning in a circle as he looked around the city. “I can’t believe that all of this is right here.”

“I guess it’s a little cool.” You said. Roxas continued to looked around in awe. “Come on, it’s over here.” You took his hand and guided him away from the skyscraper.

“What’s over there?” Roxas questioned.

“It’s a special place.” You stood in front of the restaurant then opened the door. Inside was empty as you expected. You sat down at a table and told Roxas to sit down. “Zexion took me here once. It’s a little wonder here on this world.” You then summoned a few of your Nobodies to go into the kitchen.

“Whoa! What are they doing?” Roxas asked. You smiled at his reaction.

“They’re going to make us food. I know we don’t really have to eat, but sometimes it’s fun to.” Roxas looked amazed as a few of your Nobodies came out with glasses of water. “My heartless killed Zexion.” You ran your fingers in circles around the rim of the glass. “I hid him at my old shop for a while. He saved my life.”

“Xigbar told me he was a traitor.” Roxas said.

“I don’t know about that anymore. But he was my friend when I was a Somebody. And now you’re my friend as a Nobody.” You smiled and Roxas smiled back. Your Nobodies then come out of the kitchen with plates.

“Sea salt ice cream?” Roxas said. He took the ice cream off of the plate and began to eat it. You didn’t think that your Nobodies would come out with desert and not actual food.

“I guess it’ll do.” You said as you grabbed the ice cream and began to eat.

“Do you think Xion will wake up soon?” Roxas asked as he finished his ice cream. 

“I hope so…” 

\-----

You sat by the entrance of the castle looking out towards the city. You wondered how it got here and where this world came from. You held an old note from Zexion and crumpled it in your hand. Walking to the ledge, you extended your arm out and opened your hand with your palm facing up. The crumpled note sat upon your hand for a moment until you blew it away. You lowered your arm as you watched it fall into the abyss of whatever was under the castle. 

“Time to study!” You jumped up and almost fell off of the edge. Xigbar used his teleportation to quickly move behind you to prevent you from falling. “Whatcha doing here?” He asked.

You looked behind your shoulder towards the ledge then back to his face. “Letting go.”

“Huh? Anyways, now that you're fourth in charge you need to know a few things. Man, are there stacks and stacks of reports and research for you to read.” Xigbar scratched his head then created a dark corridor. “Follow me.” He walked in and disappeared. You followed a few seconds after. You ended up in a library that was well lit and had a few windows. It was nothing like Zexion's library. 

“I've never been in here.” You said. You looked at a table with a few chairs that had a few stacks of paper and journals on it. 

“I've set up what you need to read over there.” He pulled back a chair for you. You sat down and he pushed it closer to the table. “There's still some restricted stuff, so unless you want to be turned into a dusk I'd keep with what's on the table.” Xigbar created a dark corridor.

“Wait, where are you going?” You questioned. 

“I'll be back later. You should be done by then.” He smirked then walked into the portal.

“But this could take all day!” You complained. You extended your arms for emphasis at the piles of paper.

“Better hop to it.” You heard his voice say as the portal closed.

You looked at the materials in front of you. There are reports on heartless, nobodies, vessels, and the heart. A lot of them were studies over time. You looked to the few journals you also had to read. They were about Kingdom Hearts, the Keyblade Wars, and time travel. 

This would take a while…

\-----

You were sleeping with your head on the table. Papers were scattered everywhere as you snoozed away. A dark corridor formed in the room and Xigbar walked out of it. He looked at your sleeping figure and shook his head. He walked over to you and shook you awake.

“Did you sleep this whole time?” He asked. You rubbed your eyes before answering him.

“No, I read everything. I just got bored of waiting.” You explained.

“You could have just left when you were done.” He said.

“But there isn't a door.” You said as you looked around. There were windows in the room but that was it.

Xigbar shook his head and created a dark corridor. “What about these?” He extended his arms to the portal. You sighed.

“I guess I forgot…” You admitted. Xigbar tasseled your hair. You pushed away his hand. He pretended to act hurt before walking into the portal. You created your own that would lead somewhere else. You walked through.

“Saix? You asked. His room seemed to be empty. You then noticed the heart shaped moon outside. You walked up to the huge windows in his room and put your hands against the glass.

“It's beautiful, isn't it?” You turned around to see Saix walking up to you. 

“What is it?” You asked. 

“Didn't you just finished your reading?” Saix asked. “It's Kingdom Hearts.” You looked back to the moon.

“That will make us whole again.” You said. 

“It's still far from complete. You and Roxas have more work to do. Are you ready to go back into the field?” Saix asked. You felt his breath against your hair.

“It's been a while, but I've never really had to fight heartless before. Except for the missions I've had with Roxas or Xion.” You felt Saix's nose touch the top of your head. Was he smelling you? You felt him back away from you.

“You'll be fine, Number VI.” You turned to see him giving you a small smile. It went away when your eyes met his. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked. His eyes suddenly looked sad. You knew he had something on his mind. Lately it had been crazy to adjust to so many new things. You wondered why the keyblade was so powerful in everyone’s eyes. You didn’t feel any different.

“It’s nothing.” He said as he turned away from you. You felt as if you’ve seen this side of Saix before. 

“Isa.” You said. He stopped walking and turned back towards you. “Something is making you feel jealous. You would always act like this when people called me Lea’s little girlfriend.” 

“I did no such thing.” Saix said.

“Of course you would. You’d run away and when I would ask what was wrong you’d say nothing. I didn’t know back then, but now I’m not as dense as before.” You explained. “So what is it?” 

“Was it everything you ever wanted?” Saix sternly said. You raised an eyebrow.

“What are you talking about?” You were slightly afraid at his sudden change of character.

“You’ve finally kissed Lea.” Saix scoffed. You forgot about that date. 

“It didn’t mean anything.” You said. You thought back to the kisses of your life. As a Somebody you only ever kissed Isa and Lea’s cheek. As a Nobody you shared your first kiss with Zexion. Kissing Axel didn’t feel right. He wasn’t exactly the same.

“He thinks it did!” Saix shouted. You shook your head for a second. A sudden wave of adrenaline rushed through you. You thought back to when Saix found out that you remembered. He frightened you at that time as well. This time would be different. Maybe it was the cockiness of being fourth in charge, but you weren’t going to take it this time.

“He’s changed.” You said. “It didn’t mean anything to me. He’s not Lea anymore, he’s Axel.” You summoned your keyblade and pointed it at Saix. “You’re not Isa anymore. You’re Saix. You’ve changed. The Isa I knew would never get angry at anything. You would think before you did anything. If you have a problem then we can talk about it like civilized Nobodies.” You inched closer with every word until the end of your keyblade was almost touching Saix. You summoned it back as Saix looked to you with sorrow on his face.

“You’ve changed, [Y/N].” 

“I waited for you two. Everyday. I never knew when you would next visit me. But you never did. We can’t be kids anymore. Beings friends now is going to be different than it was in the past. And maybe I have changed. All of a sudden this keyblade was thrown at me and now I’m not a zero. I have a purpose that means life or death to my friends.” You walked towards Saix and held onto him. He wrapped his arms around you.

“Can I trust you with my life?” He asked. He looked down into your eyes as you felt as if someone tugged a string inside of your heart. His face was so close to yours. You could see dark specks of brown in his yellow-orange eyes.

“We’re already dead.” You smiled and he closed the space between your lips.


	26. Chapter XXVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After about a month, I finally decided to touch Kingdom Hearts III again tonight. The second I finished it, I had put it away and cried. I decided, hey I’ve seen enough memes so I can handle watching some of the ending again. I almost did it. The second “Don’t Think Twice” started to play at the end, I lost it.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy the new chapter. Please leave comments.

“And done.” You said as you watched the heart flow up to the sky. You had just finished off a really big heartless that had a sword. It made you reminisce your time with your old blade. You looked to your keyblade and smiled. It still didn’t make complete sense on why it looked like this. It didn’t even remind you of Ventus.

You looked around Twilight Town and decided it was time to meet your friends on top of the clocktower. You wondered who would be there today. You walked past the ice cream shop and hoped that someone else bought them today. You walked up the many steps to the top of the clock tower. It made you feel like a Somebody again when you took the long way.

You heard a few voices before turning the corner. You raised an eyebrow at an unfamiliar voice.

“Demyx?” You questioned. On top of the clock tower sat Demyx and Roxas. Roxas looked beyond annoyed. He looked up to you with relief in his eyes.

“[Y/N]! I don’t think Axel is coming today…” Roxas whined. 

“So Demyx is here?” You asked again. Demyx nodded.

“I heard you come up here.” Demyx said. You rolled your eyes.

“Demyx...this is a special place. It’s kind of a…” 

“It’s the keyblade club!” Roxas cut you off. You decided to go with it.

“Yeah, the keyblade club! Me, Roxas, Xion…” You trailed off as you used your fingers to count off the three of you.

“And Axel!” Roxas said.

“But Axel doesn’t have a keyblade!” Demyx protested. 

“How do you know that?” You asked. Demyx then looked at you with wide eyes.

“Everyone has a keyblade now!” He whined for a moment before creating a dark corridor. “Fine then, I’ll leave the keyblade club.” He walked through.

“You do know he’s going to tell everyone that Axel has a keyblade, right?” Roxas said. You nodded.

“That’s the best part.” The two of you then sat down and watched the sunset.

“So no ice cream?” Roxas asked. You shook your head.

“I thought someone else would have.” You explained. Roxas brought his knees up to his chest. He looked like something was on his mind. “What’s wrong?” You asked.

“It’s just-”

“[Y/N], Roxas. Xion is awake.” You turned to see Axel standing. He created a dark corridor and motioned for the two of you to walk in. Roxas’ face perked up. So that’s what was on his mind.

\-----

You let Axel and Roxas have their moment with Xion alone as you closed her bedroom door behind you. You felt out of place with the trio. 

“I should really get a punch card.” You turned around to see Xigbar. 

“A punch card?” You raised an eyebrow.

“For every time I catch you when someone falls asleep or wakes up.” He chuckled. You turned in the other direction and started to walk away. “Whoa, whoa, whoa.” You stopped and turned around one more time.

“What?” You asked. 

“There’s a super important meeting later. On the balcony.” He said.

“Like, the top of the entire castle? Xemnas’ areas?” You asked. Xigbar nodded.

“Righto.” You gave him a thumbs up and a sarcastic look before walking away. You shook your head as you opened the door to your room and walked in. Your eyes widened at the sight of Saix. He was sleeping in your bed.

“Have you been here all day?” You asked.

“There is no day in this world.” You laughed and laid down next to him.

“I thought you’d be celebrating.” He said. 

“I’m...not really apart of their trio. I feel like I’m just kept around because of the keyblade.” You explained. Axel had grown distant lately since your relationship went back to normal. You also felt that Roxas and Xion looked up to you as someone older with a keyblade. You didn’t feel any wiser. You felt out of place.

“Lea’s forgotten all about me. He replaced me with new friends.” Saix said. You shook your head.

“He didn’t replace us.” You thought about it for a moment. “Did he?” The two of you laid down in silence for a few moments. “It can’t be that. Remember what he used to say? The more people know him, the longer he’ll live on in their hearts.” Saix chuckled.

“Hearts?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Our hearts are out there somewhere.” You said. “Some are more obvious than others. I bet you’re a basic shadow heartless.” You teased. Saix rolled over and put his arms around you.

“That’s probably true.” He sighed.

“What’s the meeting later about? The top of the castle? We never get to go up there.” You said.

“Kingdom Hearts.” Saix said. You rolled over so that your back was facing him.

“But everyone can already see it.” You looked around your room and remembered that you didn’t have a window. “Everyone except me.”

“Let’s skip it.” Saix said. You turned back around to face him.

“Uh? And be turned in a dusk? I don’t think so. That wasn’t very Isa or Saix of you.” You laughed. Saix smiled then slowly sat up. 

“I should be time by now.” He said. He stood up and created a dark corridor. “I’m afraid we must be there.” You followed Saix through the dark corridor to step onto the balcony. Already there was Luxord and Demyx. They were playing a game of cards to pass the time. Xemnas was looking up at Kingdom Hearts. Saix left you to go speak to him. You awkwardly stood alone, waiting for the others to arrive.

“I can deal you in.” You looked up to see Luxord shuffling his cards as Demyx handed him munny. You shook your head.

“I never had much luck for that kind of stuff.” Luxord shrugged his shoulders and put the deck of cards away. Demyx walked over to you.

“I don’t have any luck either. He just took all of my munny!” Demyx whined. You shook your head.

“Demyx, never bet all of your munny.” 

“But Luxord said it increases my odds of winning.” You raised an eyebrow.

“That’s not how it works, Demyx.” Soon others began to show up and you awkwardly stood to the side again, unbothered by anyone. You realized that you hardly ever spoke to Luxord or Xaldin. You wondered why you hardly ever crossed paths before.

Soon, Xemnas began to talk about Kingdom Hearts and how important it was to make everyone whole again. You began to tune out the talk as you’ve already read about Kingdom Hearts in the library. You looked around at the small numbers the Organization now had. A few faces flashed in your mind. You couldn’t believe how many traitors there used to be. You also wondered what they tried to do in Castle Oblivion.

“[Y/N].” You were finally taken out of your deep thought to see Saix. The rest of the balcony was empty except for Xemnas staring back up at Kingdom Hearts.

“It’s over?” You said. Saix nodded.

“Then let’s go somewhere.” You suggested. Saix tilted his head. He then realized that the Superior may be listening to your conversation. He created a dark corridor and led you through it. The two of you were in your room once again.

“What do you have in mind?” He asked. 

“A date.”


	27. Chapter XXVII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I've recently began a new Kingdom Hearts AU. It's set in college and it's kinda like this story with the multiple pairings and dates. If you like this story, I think you'll like it. It's called Destiny University. I guess I decided to make another story to slow down production of this one. I'm a little sad for this one to eventually end even though I have a sequel planned. 
> 
> Anyways, remember to comment as I love hearing your opinions.

“A date? What if someone sees us?” Saix asked. You weren't sure if he meant your coats or someone else in the organization seeing you two out together. Was Saix scared to be seen in public with you?

“We're friends, I don't see anything wrong with it.” You said. “Have you ever...flown before?” You asked.

“Flying? Don't be childish.” Saix scoffed. You rolled your eyes. Maybe flying wasn't such a good idea. There was still a way to get where you wanted that didn't involve flying. Maybe you'd save that feature for another time. 

“Okay fine, I promise no flying.” You created a dark corridor then turned to Saix. You grabbed his hand and led him through without giving him any time for protest. The two of you walked out of the portal to a familiar scene.

“A clock tower?” Saix asked. You sat down and swung your legs over the side. Saix sat next to you. 

“It's a little bit different.” The two of you looked up to see a normal moon. “It's kinda nice to remember what a real moon looks like.” You said.

The two of you sat and stared at the sky for a while until the clock started to ding. You looked down to see that it was midnight in this world. The two of you let the noise pass until it was silent for a while again. After a whole you stopped looking at the sky and faced Saix. He didn't seem to notice you as he was in deep thought. You stared at his thinking face for a bit longer until he noticed you. He instantly looked away.

“Why…” He started to speak, still facing away from you. “Why Lea?” He asked. “What did you see in him? I was always saving you from his constant teasing.” 

“We were kids...I was dumb.” You said. “I guess I liked him teasing me. As we grew older I never thought anything would be possible. I figured I'd grow to be the cute little old synthesis lady with stories of love that never was.” You smiled a little at the thought. You wondered if you'd ever grow old as you were now. Even if you became whole again, would you age?

“[Y/N].” Saix suddenly took your hands in his. He squeezed them for a second. “Will you help me find the girl?” He asked.

“How could I? I don’t even know what she looks like.” You said. Saix shook his head.

“Help me find out what happened. We need to rise in the ranks. We’ll be told more secrets and allowed to see more reports.” Your eyes shifted away from his gaze.

“Rising means...defeating someone above us. All that’s left is Xaldin and Xigbar.” You winced at the thought of making another member disappear. “That’s...wrong.” You said.

“We don’t have to defeat them, [Y/N]. Allow the keyblades of light to do their job.” Saix said. You looked back up to him with an unsure face.

“As long as I don’t have to hurt another Nobody. We’re all here for the same thing.” 

“Are you sure about that?” Saix questioned you. “Do you want to be whole again, [Y/N]?” 

“I don’t feel much of a difference in this form if I’m being truly honest.” You looked back up to the moon then let go of his hands. “It took for me to become a Nobody to find who I truly am.” Saix opened his mouth but no words came out. “I had to die to realize how much you mean to me.” You leaned your head against his shoulder. You sighed as he began to run his fingers through your hair. 

“Nothing will change when we’re whole.” Saix said. “I’ll still love you the same.” 

“Jeez, thanks. Nice to know what you won’t love me more when you get your heart back.” You teased. You felt Saix smile as he brought his lips to the top of your head to give a kiss. “We should go back. We have jobs to do.”

Saix nodded as he stood up then lent you a hand. You took it and stood up. The two of you walked through the dark corridor that Saix made. In the portal you made a detour that would take you to your room. Saix turned in the opposite direction to return to his quarters. You left each other without saying a proper goodbye. When you got back to your room, you saw a familiar scene before you.

“Roxas? This is my room. Did you get mixed up again?” You asked. His face was turned away from you. You didn’t get a reaction from him. “Hey, Roxas.” You said as you put a hand on his shoulder. He slowly turned his face to you. He looked terrible. “Whoa, what’s wrong?” You sat down next to him on your bed.

“Xion...left.” Roxas said. “She disappeared. No one can find her.” He explained.

“That’s not true.” Roxas looked up at you. “I haven’t tried looking for her yet.” Roxas tried to smile, but it immediately went back into a sulk.

“Are we...the bad guys?” Roxas asked. You thought back to the story of the girl that Saix and Axel were trying to find. Xemnas as a Somebody sounded like a horrible person. It was a little sketchy that he would suddenly be so helpful and try to find a way for us to all be whole again. He was using the keyblade to do this.

“Do you really think that Axel and I are bad guys?” You asked. Roxas shook his head. You wrapped your arms around him, expecting him to cry. “We’ll find her, Roxas. She’s important.” 

“She’s our friend.” Roxas said. You looked down at his face before he buried it into your shoulder. You began to wonder why Ventus and Roxas looked so similar. Roxas real name was Sora. Why does he look like Ventus, and not whatever Sora looks like? You began to ponder the face of Sora and wondered if Sora looked like Ventus. The time wouldn’t make sense. Ventus or Roxas, they were both your friends.

“Yeah, she’s our friend.”

\-----

“Axel.” You called as you caught him walking in the halls. He stopped in his tracks, but didn’t turn around.

“[Y/N]. I feel you’ve been ignoring me.” Axel said. You walked past him to be able to look him in the face. 

“I’ve been busy. I’m being wrung out. Boss man really is taking advantage of the keyblade.” You explained. Axel sighed.

“Sure. What’s up?” He asked.

“You’ve seen Sora before. In Castle Oblivion. What does he look like? Ventus? Why does Roxas look like Ventus?” You came at him with a ton of questions. Axel put up his hands in defense.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. One at a time. There’s enough of me to go around.” You rolled your eyes. “I have no idea, [Y/N]. Roxas doesn’t look anything like Sora.” Axel explained. 

“How could that be? A Nobody that doesn’t look like their Somebody.” You became more confused than before. You wished that you had the answer for the dilemma.

“He’s not the only one. There’s another girl known to the organization that looks nothing like her Somebody.” Axel said.

“What’s her name?” You asked. Axel shook his head.

“Can’t say. Check the reports.” Axel smirked. You rubbed your temples. “Ah? Can’t handle being fourth in charge?” Axel teased. You lightly punched his arm.

“I have to be able to handle it.” You said confidently. “Matter of fact...as your superior I command you to tell me the girl’s name.” 

“Letting the power get to your head, eh?” Axel tasseled your hair. “Fine, but only since you’re head over heels for me.” You crossed your arms. “Her name is Namine. Her Somebody is Kairi. It’s another one of those things that you can’t tell Roxas about.” Axel explained.

“Why are we keeping so much from him?” 

“You heard about Xion, right?” You nodded your head. “We need their trust or they’ll leave the organization.”

“Why am I so different for?” 

“Roxas came to us, keyblade in hand. Xion was made to wield her own. We never thought that you could too.” Axel used his fingers to count the three keyblade wielders in the organization.

“I have no reason to turn on the organization. Staying here helps my friends. It helps you and Isa. You two mean everything to me. Turning on the organization would be turning on you two.” You explained. 

“What would we do without you, [Y/N]?” Axel chuckled.

“Pretty sure you’d still stalk me and my shop.” Axel’s eyes widened.

“How did you…?” His mouth was left agape as he became lost in his own words.

“Lucky guess.” You lightly punched Axel’s arm then started to walk away. “I’ll see you around?” You said. Axel nodded. “And don’t worry, I know you’re close to Xion. I’ll try to find her.”

“Don’t try too hard for me now.” You continued to walk down the hall.

“But you’d be helpless without me looking too, right?” You shouted back at him. The last thing you could hear was his chuckle as you rounded the corner. You created a dark corridor to your room where you then collapsed on your bed. 

‘Do they...both think that we’re dating?’


	28. Chapter XXVIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I died for a while. I’m sorry. It’s been a very stressful but also fun few weeks for me. I also realized that this fanfiction can be a lot more funny. I mean, the 358/2 Days manga is hilarious. I might add more humor here and there where it fits. I’m really not liking how I make the story a little too serious. It takes too long to get to anything romantic. I promise, I won’t change much at all!
> 
> And please, be sure to comment. I’ve been having silent readers for this fanfiction lately and it kinda bums me out from writing more in a fast time. I update a little slower when I don’t have my usual cool comments that consist of theories, analysis, predictions, what characters you liked, or even just you freaking out because a kiss or whatever finally happened. It’s really great on my part and makes my day.

‘Where else can I look?’ You thought as you walked aimlessly around Twilight Town. You felt as if you had already flipped the world upside down for Xion. You had just started looking for her and you weren’t going to give up easily. You decided to try looking in another world tomorrow as you had plans for the rest of the day.

“Xion...hold on a little longer.” You said as you created a dark corridor. You began to walk through before looking back, hoping to see something. You were met with nothing before you decided to turn around and return to the castle.

\-----

“So what is it today?” You asked as you sat down at the kitchen table. Saix continued to stir something in a pot before picking up a bowl and filling it with the substance. He brought it over to you before going back to fill up his bowl.

“It’s...soup?” You asked. You picked up your spoon and swirled the liquid around. You picked something up from the bowl and sniffed it. “It’s beef soup.” You said. Saix sat down next to you as he awaited your response. The two of you decided recently that you could give him your opinions on his cooking. The first few times were completely morbid as the two of you discovered that someone had been changing the labels on the spices. Cumin and cocoa did not mix well at all.

“Finally, you can tell what it is at least.” Saix said. He sounded relieved. You raised the spoon to your mouth before eating it. You chewed the meat for a while until you swallowed.

“It’s good.” You said. Saix gave a small smile as he began to try his own bowl. “It’s not perfect, but it’s good and edible.” You said. Saix rolled his eyes. “You’re improving.”

“I’ve also still been finding labels that are switched. I swear if I ever find the culprit I’ll-” Just then the two of you heard a dark corridor open. You looked up to the ceiling to see a hand coming down to open a cabinet. It took two spice bottles before the portal disappeared. Soon, it reappeared and it placed the bottles back in the cabinet. Saix almost tipped over the table as he rushed to grab the hand and pull it out of the portal. From the ceiling came down an entire cloaked body.

“Demyx!” You shouted. You began to giggle as he realized the trouble that he was in. He panicked before looked back and forth between you laughing and Saix summoning his weapon.

“Gotta go! Bye, [Y/N]!” He shouted before created a dark corridor behind him and running through it. Saix began to follow but you stopped him.

“It’s gonna get cold.” You teased. You came up behind him and put an arm on his shoulder, encouraging him to put away his weapon. Eventually he came back to the table and the two of you enjoyed the soup.

“[Y/N].” Saix said. You looked up as you finished your soup. You swallowed the last bite and put your spoon down.

“Yeah?” You answered.

“Are we…” Saix seemed to be lost in deep thought or in conflict with himself as he stopped mid sentence. “Nevermind.”

“No, what is it?” You pressed.

“What are we?” He asked. You tried to hide your expression as you knew exactly what he was asking. You decided to take the safe route.

“You’re my best friend.” You started. “I care for you a lot and I don’t know what I would do without you.” Saix showed no signs of hurt or happiness as he paused for a moment. He began to open his mouth but as interrupted. 

“Number Seven. You are needed in my quarters.” The two of you turned to see Xemnas standing in the kitchen. You looked up at Saix as he stood up and followed your boss out of the kitchen.

‘Did I mess up?’

\-----

“[Y/N], are you sure we aren’t the bad guys?” Roxas asked. You continued to rub his back as he sulked on his bed. Xion had just been brought back by Axel by force. It wasn’t a pretty report to read. Xion wasn’t in a healthy state which made Roxas worried.

“I would never hurt you, Roxas. Axel wouldn’t hurt you either. You’re safe here with me.” You tried to reassure him despite your own doubts about the higher ups. You thought back to the mysterious girl that Saix was looking for. Who could she be? What did Xemnas do with her? “How about we go back to that place I took you to?” You suggested. Roxas shook his head no as he sighed.

“It’ll be okay. She just needs time then we can support her.” You explained to Roxas. He leaned against your shoulder and you kissed the top of his head. Within a few minutes he had fallen asleep. You took the boy and laid him down properly in his bed.

“Goodnight, Roxas.” You said before kissing him forehead and leaving the room.

\-----

“Watching the sunrise.” Axel said as he leaned back on the clock tower. The two of you sat on the opposite side to reverse things up a little bit. Instead of ice cream the two of you sported travel mugs filled with hot cocoa that you had made. You were extra careful to make sure that none of the spices has switched labels by giving the taste test before you poured it into the pot. 

Axel took a sip of his cocoa then set it down next to him. He pretended to yawn in order to put an arm around you. You snuggled closer to him and leaned your head on his chest. He kissed the top of your forehead as the two of you continued to sip on your cocoa and watch the sunrise.

You used the mug to shield your eyes from the brightness as your eyes adjusted to the light. You slowly placed down the empty mug and the two of you watched the sun come up. It had different colors than the sunset. It was filled with shades of purples and blues.

“This is going to sound so lame, but this reminds me of Isa. I wish he were here.” Axel moved his arms to your waist and pulled your closer.

“He’s back at the castle.” You said. At the sound of his name a feeling rose in you chest as you thought of your other best friend. Your mind flashed with images of you and Saix followed by images of you and Axel. These past few days had been filled with lying and romantic moments that the readers can leave to their imaginations.

“That’s not Isa. He’s long gone.” Axel said. He turned to you and looked down into your eyes.

“All that matters, is you’re still here and you’re still you.” He leaned down for a kiss which you accepted amongst the thoughts flowing through your mind.

\-----

“Demyx! It’s been forever.” You said as you slumped onto his bed. He sat next to you on his bed with a bit of force. The bed began to move as if you were laying on water. “You got a water bed?” You snorted.

“Of course. If it breaks, it’s easy clean up for me.” He laughed. He then picked up his sitar and began to play random chords. “I can’t believe you’re my boss.” He groaned. “I thought you and Saix were going to kill me in the kitchen the other day.”

“I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you.” You admitted. Demyx smiled as he gave a tiny riff on his sitar before going back to random chords.

“I appreciate it. I know I’m not a fan favorite here.” Demyx said. “Especially to Saix. He hates me.”

“He doesn’t hate you. You just need to fulfill your missions more.” You reached over to tassle his hair. He laughed before lightly swatting your hand away.

“Fine, fine. But he keeps giving me icky jobs. Icky jobs are for Axel, not me.” He frowned.

“I’ll see if I can tell him something that can help.” You smiled.

“You two have been really close lately. Did something happen?” Demyx asked. You thought back to the night of the kiss and everything in between that the readers could leave to their imagination. You began to turn a slight pink cover before brushing it away.

“We’re just basking in old memories, that’s all. I’m pretty sure I remember one hundred percent of my past now. All the amnesia is gone.” You knocked on the top of your head playfully with a fist and nervously laughed.

“Alright then, so it’ll be okay if we go on another date?” You breath got caught in your throat as you realized the situation you were in. Saix and Axel must both think that you are dating them without knowing about the other. Now here is Demyx asking you if you would like to go on another date with him. This date just spelled trouble and a horrible love triangle.

“Sure.” Lately, you’ve decided that you liked the feeling of trouble.


	29. Chapter XXIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized that the last time I updated a story was on the 26th, my birthday. I should change my age from 19 to 20 on my profile. Anyways, I guess you should bring tissues for this chapter. It’s been boiling up for a while now, and we all knew it was going to happen at some point.

It hadn’t even been a week and she was gone again. An emergency notice was given out to the members of the organization to bring Xion back by force if seen or to eliminate her. Roxas didn’t know anything about it. Within the notice was to keep this a secret from Roxas. The poor boy have been wondering where his friend had been all morning. The tension in the castle could be cut with one of Xaldin’s lances.

“If I had one hundred munny for everytime that girl has gone missing…” Axel said under his breath. The two of you were watching Roxas as he worried over his missing friend. It pained you to keep the truth from him. 

“Be quiet.” You told Axel. You didn’t want Roxas to hear anything. You wanted to try and get his mind off of the subject. “Hey Roxas, how about we start our missions for today?” You suggested.

“Saix told me I wouldn’t have any missions for a while.” Roxas explained. You lightly sighed as you realized his intentions for this. He didn’t want Roxas to come across Xion. “I feel like you guys aren’t telling me everything. Where is Xion?”

“I haven’t seen her all morning either. She probably already went on her mission.” You said. Roxas became more frustrated by your answer.

“What...is Xion?” Roxas looked to Axel with a desperate plea in his eyes.

“You’ve been feeling weaker lately.” Axel started. You looked to him and gasped lightly. He couldn’t let Roxas know the truth. You didn’t want him to leave. You would all lose his trust. “I...I really shouldn’t.” Axel said. Roxas got closer to Axel. You thought he would push or punch his friend.

“We’re supposed to be friends. Stop lying to me.” Roxas said. He seemed to finally be on the brink of tears. You looked back and hid your face from the two. You hoped that someone would walk into the room to stop this from happening.

“Xion is a puppet. Created to reciprocate your powers.” Axel finally said. Roxas took a few steps back in disbelief.

“She’s not...a real person?” He looked lost. Was he questioning his existence?

“She is a real person.” You said. “She has her own thoughts and feelings. That’s why she keeps leaving.” You shielded your mouth in disbelief of what you said. The wound was already open and you poured salt into it. Roxas looked angry at the two of you.

“She really did run away again? Well, I’m going to find her!” Roxas then began to run away. You and Axel looked at each other. 

“I’ll make sure he doesn’t leave this world.” He created a dark corridor and ran through it. You looked back to where Roxas ran off to.

“Then I’ll follow him.” You ran out of the room and down the hallways. You watched as Roxas fought dusks and other lower ranked Nobodies. Did the rest of the organization already know that Roxas was trying to escape? Who had called for him to be attacked?

“Roxas! Stop!” You summoned a few of your Samurai nobodies to try and block Roxas from going deeper into the castle, but he defeated them with ease. You continued to chase after him.

You began to realize that everyone was trying to stop Roxas from escaping. You watched as you passed Luxord who summoned his own card Nobodies to stop Roxas. As you chased him down further you also found Xigbar and Xaldin summoning shooter and lance Nobodies. You hoped that no one would hurt him. 

As you neared the end of the castle your breath became stuck in your throat. You finally saw Saix who was blocking Roxas from the final exit. He summoned his claymore. 

“Don’t hurt him!” You shouted. Saix swung at Roxas. Roxas dodged the attack. The two rushed each other and began to attack. “Saix, stop!” You shouted again. He seemed too distracted by the fight. You could not believe that Roxas was actually taking on Saix as he was a higher rank in both strength and command than Roxas was.

“He is attempting to commit treason.” Saix finally said back to you.

“Roxas, please don’t leave.” You said. You ran closer to the two and drew your weapon alongside Saix. “Please, I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“This isn’t between us, [Y/N].” Roxas said. “The organization isn’t good...and Saix is apart of them! Come with me, I know you’re a good guy.” 

“Roxas…” You looked to the ground at his words. Roxas too put his guard down and Saix used the opportunity to strike him. The two began to fight again, but it was clear that Saix was becoming tired. Even with the power of Kingdom Hearts, Roxas had become too powerful for Saix. You couldn’t believe the power of the keyblade. You began to wonder if these ranks were a bunch of lies. If Roxas had this power...did that mean that you had that as well? Could you surpass that power? Just how strong could you be?

Soon, Saix was tired to the point that Roxas could escape. Saix was breathing heavily on the ground as he looked up. He watched in anger as Roxas escaped the castle.

“[Y/N], go after him!” He shouted. You looked down to his tired form with worry before bolting off into the distance. When you exited the castle you found Axel nearby. He was next to a dark corridor.

“Let’s cut him off at the edge.” He took your hand and led you through the portal. The two of you stepped out onto a street. Axel leaned against a building as you awkwardly stood nearby. Soon you could see Roxas’s form walking towards you two. He became closer then slowly passed the two of you. “If you leave now, it’s treason. You could never come back to the organization.” 

“No one would miss me.” Roxas stopped in his tracks for a second then continued to walk away. 

“That’s not true...I would.” You watched Axel as all he gave Roxas was words. You couldn’t believe that he wasn’t trying to stop him.

“Roxas, please don’t do this.” You said. He stopped briefly for a second time.

“If you don’t join me, then I don’t think we value the same things. When I come back with Xion...I’ll defeat the organization. I’ll defeat Xemnas. Don’t make me regret sparing you.” Your mouth opened but nothing came out. You couldn’t believe what Roxas was trying to do. You reached a hand out for him, but he was already gone. Axel sighed and opened a dark corridor.

“Is that it?” You said. “You’re just going to let him leave?”

“We have to tell the organization that he’s planning an attack. If he finds Xion...he’ll become even more powerful.” Axel walked through the portal and it shut behind him. You looked back to the direction that Roxas went. You knew what you had to do. You created a dark corridor and walked through.

\-----

The streets of Twilight Town were eerily quiet as you walked. You had looked around everywhere but the clock tower. You knew he had to be there, but you didn’t know why you didn’t check there first. Maybe you just needed the time to think about all of the lies and dishonesty that you and others had given to Roxas. 

You too began to wonder if the organization was doing good. You couldn’t leave like Roxas could. You cared too much for your friends. It didn’t matter how much you still didn’t know about Xemnas. You had to carry on for your friends...for that mysterious girl that you knew nothing about. You wandered the streets for a little while longer as you came towards the clock tower. 

“What’s that?” In the distance you could see a giant...something being defeated by someone. It had to be Roxas. You began to run up the hill to catch up. You hoped that he was okay. As you came closer you could no longer see the large figure from before. As your head became leveled with the ground of the clock tower you noticed two figured in the distance. You slowed your running as you realized who it was.

Wait...just, who was that?

You slowly walked over to Roxas as he held a girl in his arms who seemed to be freezing and vanishing. Did he do that to her? Was she dying? Did Roxas kill her?

You watched as the two exchanged words with one another. Roxas too seemed to not know who she was. You felt something drop from your face and hit the ground next to the two as you stared at them. You brought your hand up to your face to feel tears pouring out. 

Soon the two were directly in front of you as you crouched down.

“Xion! Who else will I have ice cream with?” For a moment you remembered who this girl was. You reached out to touch her as Roxas held her vanishing figure in his arms. When your hand had finally reached where she once was, she was gone.

“Xion…” You whispered under your breath as the memory began to fade away. Once again you were left confused with tears streaming down your face. You didn’t understand what had just happened or who that was.

“[Y/N].” Roxas called. You looked up to his face that was also wet from tears. “I have to go.” He slowly got up. You looked up to him from the ground.

“I know.” You said, giving in. His face looked scared and confused.

“I promise, I’ll see you again someday. You, me, and Axel can have ice cream again.” He smiled.

You got up and gave him a half hearted smile. “Don’t forget. Please...be careful.” You hugged him for a small moment before backing away. “Go.” You commanded.

Roxas nodded his head and turned away. You kept your eyes on the ground as your friend vanished. When you finally looked up, you were alone in front of the clock tower. You decided to walk up to it where you sat down and swung your legs over. You looked off into the sunset. Your tears had stopped a short while ago, but for some reason they had returned. You heard feet scuffling against the floor then looked away from the sunset.

To your left was Isa and to your right was Lea. You closed your eyes.


	30. Chapter XXX (Updated)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey I decided I wanted to write more. I couldn't just leave you guys on that cliffhanger for the weekend. I know it's bad to update on an irregular basis as you shouldn't spoil your readers, but all of you on every site I post this fanfiction on are such wholesome people. Anyways, I try to update my main stories once a week and my oneshot collection at least twice a month...but I'm on spring break now so, you might get spoiled. 
> 
> But please comment. Comments make it easier to spoil you.
> 
> I decided to edit this chapter slightly as it may be confusing at some points. The reader is losing some memories as Namine is putting the final touches on Sora. So the reader is constantly dizzy and not as engaged. She is connected to Sora due to Xion and Roxas, thus she is also affected by Namine’s powers. I have added a few more words and sentences here and there to explain the dizzy state that the reader is in. (Also it’s been a while since some of you have played KH2 if you forgot what happens during/after the final Axel battle.)

“They're gone.” You whispered under your breath. You thought it was a figment of your imagination, but Lea and Isa remained by your side. They really were here by your side. Despite Isa feeling betrayed by Lea. Despite Lea feeling betrayed by Isa. They were here. How could it be possible? Were they alive again? You blinked your eyes a few times in disbelief.

“Roxas is gone.” Lea corrected you. You wondered why you said they. Were you talking about Lea and Isa? You were confusing yourself. You held your head with one hand as a stinging pain hit you. You shook it off as a dizzy spell took over your mind.

“What are you two doing here?” You asked. For a moment your sight felt fuzzy. Slowly, Isa and Lea became Saix and Axel. So it was a figment of your imagination. You sighed as their blacked coats seemed to reappear. Saix's eyes turned from green to orange and his scar returned. Axel's teardrop tattoos formed on his face. Their hair returned to their normal length. You shook your head, wondering why your sight had shown you them as their original selves for a short moment. What was going on?

“You never returned to the castle after Roxas left.” Axel started. He looked out into the sunset. “We got worried.” He acted as if nothing was out of the blue with you. Did they not see you grabbing your head moments ago in pain?

“I was told right away.” Saix said. “We wanted to make sure that you didn't betray us.” He too, seemed completely unaware of what has just happened.

“I can't betray the organization. That would be turning my back on you two.” You looked out into the sunset. Saix looked away from the bright light. “But why are you both here? You hate each other now. It'll never be the same.” Although your mind was hurting, the words kept flowing. Even though you felt to be flowing in and out of consciousness, your mind was still able to keep up with the conversation.

“I can tolerate the crybaby for a few moments if it means making you happy.” Saix scoffed. Axel rolled his eyes. You slightly laughed, but you didn’t feel happy.

“You were worried about her too!” Axel called out Saix. The two glared at each other as the tension grew. As your emotions of the prior situation of Roxas and … began to make you numb, you realized how dangerous the situation you were now in was. You shook your head and the dizziness faded away. You finally took in what had just happened and who you were alone with. You needed to get out of here, and fast.

“I need...time.” You said as you stood up. “I liked Roxas. He was my friend.” It was true that you were friends with Roxas, but it wasn’t entirely the reason why you needed to leave. The two sat there dumbfounded as you opened a dark corridor and walked through. You didn’t even give them an opportunity to protest. You sighed as you came to the other side of the portal. You took in a deep breath.

The smell of books surrounded you. Zexion's library was a place for you to mourn. You hoped that Roxas would return to the castle safe. Maybe you too would aid in defeating the organization. As long as you could assure the safety of your friends, you would do anything for them.

\-----

“...struck down.” The end of a sentence passed into your ears as you walked into a room. Saix was talking quietly with Xaldin. The two of them cleared their throats as you approached. Your steps became heavier as you felt the tension in the room grow as you became closer.

“Struck down?” You questioned. Xaldin gave Saix a weird look before walking away. You silently watched him walk out of the room. Saix turned to face you, but you were still looking towards the doorway. You slightly winced as pain followed by another dizzy spell hit your mind.

“Roxas has been struck down by a keyblade wielder of light.” Saix explained. You tried to concentrate on his words.

“He's...gone?” You asked. Saix shook his head. Just like last time, he didn’t seem to notice that you were in pain. You tried to focus on his face, but your vision became blurry.

“Not exactly. I know this is hard for you. He's been taken away. They want to wake Sora, and Roxas is needed for that task.” He explained. A million questions popped into your head. You tried to shake away the pain and you could feel it eventually fade away, however, the dizziness remained.

“Who's they?” You decided to ask first. You blinked a few times, not wanting to faint in front of Saix.

“The wielders of light. The ones who struck down half of our numbers in Castle Oblivion.” You sighed, realizing that you really were the bad guys. Maybe it was better if Sora could wake up. These others wielders could defeat the organization. But you wanted to keep your friends safe. Wait...these thoughts were all wrong.

“This is nonsense.” You said as you walked out of the room. You walked down the hallway, not bothering to make a dark corridor. You hoped that the longer way back would give you more time to think and be alone. But maybe you should create a dark corridor to your room. At any moment now you could pass out...or the dizziness would go away and everything would continue as if it had never happened. You sighed as your mind felt as if it were battling itself.

“Whoa, whoa, where are you going?” You turned towards the voice to see Xigbar. You glared at him with an angry look on your face. He put his hands up in front of him. “Why so mad? Hurry up and drink your coffee already, we have a meeting.” He began to walk away. You too didn’t understand why you were so mad. He was a higher rank than you, so he deserved respect. Although, you could possible defeat him in combat… You shook your head at the thought. 

'A meeting?’ You thought to yourself. You finally created a dark corridor and walked through. You ended up on your seat, the sixth seat. Almost everyone was here. You put your hood up and leaned back in your chair as you waited for the rest of the organization. 

“As we all know, Roxas was been defeated by none other than Riku. This could only mean that Sora will be waking up soon. I have created a plan that will end in success no matter what happens.” Xemnas began the meeting. He gestured to Saix to let him continue to explain the plan.

“[Y/N] and Axel, you are to bring back Roxas by force. If you fail, then the rest of us need to create chaos in the worlds. Create more heartless for Sora and the other wielders to slay. Either way, we will have at least two keyblade wielders to collect hearts to complete Kingdom Hearts.” You looked around seeing a few eyes on on you. You must be one of the two keyblade wielders. The other one would be either Roxas or Sora. 

“If Roxas is returned to Sora, then Axel will also assist with creating darkness in worlds. As for [Y/N], you shall help each member with this task. Collect hearts along the way.” Xemnas was looking directly at you. You hoped that no one could see your face behind your hood. You nodded to confirm that you understood. You decided to leave the meeting first before confirming if it was over. You created a dark corridor and let yourself slip through the portal. 

\-----

The library once again became your sanctuary as you let your thoughts take a hold of you. You couldn’t help but feel that more than one thing was tugging at your heartstrings, if you had any. Roxas leaving and being defeated had meant that your promise would never be fulfilled. When Roxas joined back with Sora he would be whole again, but he wouldn’t be the same person. He was a rare case of Nobody, as were you with your heartless. You often wondered where she was since no one had spotted her for ages. What could she be plotting?

Then there was the other question of these dizzy spells. They only started to happen after Roxas left the organization. Were these two events connected? It always started with pain, but would then be replaced with dizziness. Why was that? You wished that Zexion were still here, he would probably have the answer to all of your questions.

“[Y/N], I know that you’re upset but we don’t have much time left.” You looked up as Axel grabbed your wrist. He created a dark corridor and practically shoved you through it. Before you could protest, he tried to explain. “We have one more shot at getting Roxas back and I need you to help me.”

“You’ve been carrying out our mission without me?!” You shouted. Axel winced before pulling you through the end of the portal. You were in Twilight Town, but something was off. Suddenly, the pain hit your head again. You slightly groaned. Axel took notice of this and handed you a potion.

“You need to pull it together for a while. Look, I’ll create a diversion, but please, try to talk to him.” He led you through the twists and turns of trees until you were met with the old large building that you hadn’t been to often. Is this what others would call a mansion? Axel led you through the various halls until you were met with steps that went down to a basement. Along the way you had drunk the potion, but had little to no effect on you as the pain subsided and the dizziness came. 

“He’s down here?” You asked. Your vision became blurry and suddenly you didn’t know where ‘here’ was anymore. You couldn’t see far, but you could see close. 

“Sorta.” Axel continued to lead you through until he whispered for you to be quiet. The two of you hid behind a wall as you heard grunts and the sound of technology being torn apart. Axel led you a few steps back into the previous room and created a dark corridor. “I’m going in first. Count to eight, then go in and close it. You have to close it, got it memorized?” You nodded your head as the look in Axel’s eyes were concerning you. This was your final chance to get back Roxas...to get back Ventus. He walked in.

‘One...two…screw it.’ You thought as you walked through the portal. You closed it behind you and continued forward with slow steps until you could see Axel and Roxas fighting on the other side. You realized that your dizziness had disappeared. Your legs began to move faster until you were running towards your two friends. 

“Roxas!” You shouted. The two were huffing and puffing as you came onto the scene. Axel gave a smirk as Roxas looked upset. He gave you a scowl as he looked back and forth between you and Axel.

“There are more of you?!” He shouted. He screamed before preparing his dual keyblades to attack you. You summoned Starlight and deflected the attack. He looked surprised that you had a keyblade too, but he shook it away and put up him guard once more.

“Roxas, it’s me, [Y/N].” Roxas continued to fight as you dodged his attacks. “You promised me!” You shouted. Roxas took a step back and scoffed.

“Why would I promise you anything?” You fought back tears at his harsh words. Were these feelings similar to what Roxas felt when he defeated Xion? Wait...what were you talking about? The pain returned and you used one arm to grab your head in pain. 

“Xion…” You said. As if on cue, the pain was replaced with dizziness. Roxas suddenly gave up his guard and Axel took the opportunity to rush him. “No!” You shouted at him. You weren’t sure what you had just said or what it meant, but you didn’t think fighting would help the confused state that Roxas was in. Roxas fought Axel for a while until the two were out of breath again.

“Get out of my head!” Roxas shouted to you. Whatever you had said, must have really gotten to him.

“You promised that we’d see each other again.” You tried to hold back tears from falling as they welled up in your eyes. You swallowed nothing then prepared for the worst. “Roxas, I miss you.” You dropped your keyblade and it faded away. Your hand that was holding your head had dropped to your side. You were defenseless.

“This ends now.” He said as he rushed towards you. You suddenly raised your hands up. Maybe hitting you would help him remember. You closed your eyes and waited for the impact, but nothing came. You looked up to see Axel blocking the attack. He pushed you out of the way before created a wall of fire that surrounded him and Roxas. You sighed and sat down as you waited for the storm to calm. You slipped in and out of consciousness as the sounds of your two friends clashing filled the room.

The Roxas you knew was gone. Maybe it was right for him to return to Sora. Maybe Sora...could be your friend. You chuckled to yourself. Maybe in another life. Soon, the fire cleared and only Axel was left behind. You looked around and saw no sign of Roxas. Maybe he had escaped through one of the various doors in the room. Axel took a few moments to breathe before approaching you, although you were still distracted by were Roxas had disappeared to.

“He’s...long gone.” Axel said before he collapsed. You winced. Axel’s form looked blurry to you. You reached out to touch him, but you began to fall sideways.

“Goodbye, Roxas.” Were your last words before you had joined Axel in a state of sleep.

\-----

“Ventus, you’re back!” Lea called as he spotted his friend. Ventus turned around and waved to the red haired boy. Lea stood in front of Ventus with a large smile on his face. “How long as you here for?” He asked.

“Not long.” Ventus looked up to the orange and purple sky. Sunset was fast approaching Radiant Garden. “Hey, would you follow me?” Ventus asked. Lea nodded and followed Ventus away from the square and into town. The two climbed up onto a rooftop, facing the sunset.

“I have this weird feeling...that I’m not going to see you again for a long time.” Lea said. Ventus stared at the sunset without looking to Lea. He took in the familiar look and feel of the moment.

“I do too.” Ventus said. The two boys sat in awkward silence for a few moments.

“I should get [Y/N] and Isa. They’ll love to tell you goodbye.” Lea said as he began to get off of the rooftop. Ventus stopped him and motioned for Lea to sit back down.

“That’s alright. It’s better this way.” Ventus looked back to the sunset yet again, hypnotized by the hues of violet and orange. “Hey, Lea?” Ventus asked.

“Hm?” Lea replied.

“[Y/N]...you two really like her, don’t you?” Lea covered his face, but then realized that Ventus had not taken his eyes off of the sunset. He relaxed and leaned back into place then cleared his throat.

“She’s our b-best friend.” He admitted. Ventus smiled at his response. He turned his face towards Lea and smiled. There were so many emotions behind his eyes, but the colors from the sunset hid them well.

“Then take care of her for me, promise?” Lea’s breath was stuck in his throat for a moment before he finally swallow it. He smiled at his new friend. Behind his smile, he felt empty as he knew Ventus would leave after he answered. He took one more moment before replying, as if telling his friend goodbye for longer than he could count.

“Promise.”


	31. Chapter XXXI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I heard you like flashbacks. Well, I’ve been planning this chapter out for quite awhile now and here you go. Flashbacks. A few of these you may have wondered about in the past.
> 
> Please comment and I'll PM you the recipe for the Paopu Fruit Frappaccino.

“Thanks, mommy!” You said as you walked outside of your house. You went over to one of the windows and smelled the flowers. All along the windows on the outside of your house were rectangular vases filled with flowers. You mother had tasked you with watering these flowers. Your plastic watering can splashed water all over the ground as your went onto your tiptoes and sprinkled the water over the flowers.

A lot of water was going on the ground than into the pots due to your height. Well, you were four years old after all. You went over to the next pot and watered the flowers there. The plants looked sad in this area. They received less sun because they were between your house and your neighbors house. You set down your watering can and pouted at the flowers. 

From the corner of your eye you could see something moving. You jumped up and grabbed your watering can. You held it in front of you as if the tip where the water came out was a sword. You looked around and saw an eye peeking out from the window of your neighbor’s house. You slowly lowered your watering can from your battle stance and smiled. You raised a hand and waved at the eye. In the process, your other hand dropped the can and spilled water all over the cement. You pouted, but looked up to see a boy laughing at you through the window.

You didn’t know that a boy lived next door. You picked up the watering can and stomped back into your house. You mother took notice of your angry look and wet shoes.

“Aw, sweetie, what happened?” She asked. You huffed out your nose and sat down on the ground.

“I dropped the can and the boy laughed at me.” You crossed your arms and glared angrily at the ground.

“What boy?” Your mother asked. She took off your shoes and set them by the front door to dry off. She helped you with your socks and made a stinky face as she threw them in the hamper. You laughed.

“The boy next door!” You said, more happily this time. Your mother always knew how to make you smile. “Can I play with him?” You asked. 

“I didn’t know there was a boy next door. We’ll see what mommy can do.” Your mother smiled and helped you off of the ground. You looked forward to meeting this boy, even if he had laughed at you.

\-----

“[Y/N], this is Ienzo.” Your mother said as she opened the door. You peeked out from behind her legs to see that familiar eye. You wondered why he covered the other one with his hair. Ienzo’s mom smiled at your mom before leaving Ienzo at your house. Ienzo walked in and looked around. He had yet to say a word.

“Hello.” You said as you approached the boy. He looked at you then smiled.

“You dropped that watering can in the alley.” He giggled. You stomped your foot.

“It wasn’t funny! I wanted to say hi!” You protested. He continued to laugh but instead of growing more angry, you began to laugh with him. Your mom watched at the moment unfolded and was glad to see that the two of you were off to a great start. 

“Why don’t you two go to your room and play with your toys?” You mother suggested. You nodded and began to lead Ienzo into your room.

“If you like cars, you’re gonna have a blast! I have tons of cars and blocks.” You said as you ran down the hallway. Your mother smiled.

\-----

“But she’s a girl.” Ienzo protested to your mother. You mother laughed half heartedly. She gestured towards the tub.

“Your mother told me it was okay. It saves water this way. Baths together are fun, no harm, no foul.” Your mother smiled at Ienzo. You were already in the tub playing with your rubber duck and toy boat. You were pretending that the duck was the captain of the sailboat. Ienzo looked to the toys and couldn’t resist not being apart of the fun. He tore off all of his clothes except for his underwear and jumped into the tub. You giggled as some water splashed out the sides. You gave the boat to Ienzo and allowed him to play with you as your mother began to shampoo your hair.

Soon, the two of you were clean and cuddled up into your individual towels. Ienzo made the boat sail through the air as you made the rubber duck quack.

\-----  
“[Y/N], I'm moving out.” Ienzo said. Tears fell down your cheeks at his words. He was an orphan, where would he go?

“We aren't going to be neighbors anymore?” You whined. Ienzo handed you a letter that you read over. Your eyes widened. “The castle? Can I still make you food?”

“I'm sorry. I heard Moogles can do deliveries if you also give them some of the goods.” Ienzo said. 

“Alright! I'll make two lunches then. One for the Moogle and one for you!” You hugged your Ienzo. He hugged you back. You hoped that he would have fun in the castle...without you.

“I'm really going to miss you.” You said.

“Me too, [Y/N].” Ienzo let go then gave you something. It was a bracelet. “I had a Moogle put our names and friends forever on it.” You looked at the initials. It indeed had your name on it along with his. 

“Thanks, Ienzo.” You held it close to your chest before putting it on.

\-----

Life had become quiet without Ienzo around. His parents had disappeared, or that's what your mother told you. You had a feeling you knew what actually happened. His parents had died. One of the scientists that lived in the castle took Ienzo under his wing. Ienzo would grow up to be an apprentice and wouldn't be allowed to play with you much anymore. You would make food to send over to the castle for him. You hoped that he actually got the food. There was a Moogle service that would deliver packages to the castle. Mostly it was used for laboratory ingredients, but by bribing the Moogles with your pocket change you were able to include your packed homemade food for Ienzo.

Sometimes he would send you letters. He couldn't tell you much about the lab, but he talked about his new caretaker and how he was like a father figure. Professor Ansem seemed to be a caring man to your friend Ienzo. You hadn't met anyone from the castle before. You've only seen the two large guards outside. Those men had to be almost seven feet tall!

Lately you had picked up an interest in easy synthesis. It made you feel closer to Ienzo as he was learning this. He said he would be learning other cool and advanced things, but he wasn't allowed to tell you what it was. You hoped to someday be able to see it. Maybe if you learned enough, you could be good enough to be an apprentice someday too. But you knew that was just an unrealistic dream. Your father had passed away recently due to illness. The reality of you providing for your mom was very likely.

One day, you decided to eat your lunch in the main square. Here you would see temporary shops or Moogles searching the flower beds for cheap ingredients. It was a peaceful area that you trusted. It wasn't the prettiest in the world, but it was tranquil. 

You unwrapped your favorite food from inside your lunch box and began to eat it. Cooking was something your father enjoyed. He would try to show you, but you weren't interested in it much. It wasn't until he passed away that you asked your mother to show you how. It made you feel closer to his heart to cook food. You wished that he could taste everything you made. 

“I swear, it's gonna be cool. I almost have enough money for them too!” You heard someone talking loudly in the distance. Usually there wasn't much chatter in the square. You took no note of it as you continued to eat. 

“It's honestly your worst waste of money yet. Now if you'd excuse me, I'm going to spend my money wisely. Don't go too far.” Another voice was heard. You couldn't help but eavesdrop a little this time. You wondered what these two voices were going on about.

“Hey, that smells good. Did you make it yourself?” Suddenly someone was standing right in front of you. You slightly jumped up where you were seated as you realized his face was really close to yours. When you calmed down you took in the boy's features. He seemed to be maybe a year or two older than you. He had spiked up red hair and emerald green eyes. The brightness of his eyes seemed to reciprocate into his vibrant personality. You blushed slightly and looked away.

The boy however, was laughing. It was probably because he really startled you. He smiled then sat down to you. “My name's Lea, got it memorized? Now I'd like to really memorize what that is.” He pointed to your favorite food. “It smells so good.”

“I did make it actually. Did you...want to taste it?” You asked. You ripped a piece off and handed it to him on a napkin. He took it but paused before it could reach his mouth. “Don’t worry, my hands are clean.” You smiled.

“Are you sure?” He asked. He then realized what he said and decided to clear it up. “I mean, are you sure you want to give this to me?”

“Well you're already breathing all over it, so I don't know what I would do if you just gave it back.” You giggled. Lea smiled.

“You're funny, I like you.” He then took a bite and instantly fell in love. “This is amazing!” He shouted.

“What are you doing? Lea, stop tormenting the poor girl.” You looked up to see the owner of the other voice you had heard. The boy had blue spiked hair styles neatly and almost matching emerald green eyes. They were slightly more blue than Lea's eyes. 

“But she offered it to me! And it’s so good!” Lea rang back in protest. The blue haired boy shook his head then crouched down next to you.

“May I ask your name?” He said. You could feel that blush from before returning. Your mom had warned you about boys and crushes. You tried to shake it away.

“I'm [Y/N].” You said. The boy extended his hand and gave yours a light shake.

“My name is Isa. I apologise for the behavior of my... acquaintance, Lea.” He stood back up and glared at Lea.

“What?! Acquaintance?! I'll have you know that Isa and I are best friends.” Lea smirked. 

“Please don't let the entire town believe that.” Isa shook his head. He then looked to his friend and smirked. So they actually were best friends. You smiled as you reached into your lunchbox to rip another piece of your food into a napkin. You held it towards Isa.

“Want to see what all of the fuss is about?” You asked. Isa looked surprised. “It's okay, I really did offer it to him. All he wanted to know was what it was. I thought the best way to answer was to have him taste it.” Isa took the food from you and your fingers lightly brushed against each other. You could have sworn that he flinched away.

“Well, I guess if you’re offering it’d be fine. Thank you. And what is it actually called?” He said as he raised it to his mouth. You wait for him to chew before answering the question.

“Why it's [F/F]. It's probably the best thing I can cook.” You said. Isa's eyes widened. 

“This is...really god. It's the best thing I've had in awhile.” He said. You smiled.

“See, I told ya!” Lea chimed in.

“Thanks, I'm glad you both liked it.” You began to collect your things and stand up. 

“Hey, where are you going?” Lea asked. Isa rolled his eyes and began to scold his friend.

“I have to go home now, it's almost getting dark.” You said. “If you ever want to try more food, you can come over.” You took a napkin out and wrote your address down on it. “Here.” You began to hand it to Lea, then changed your mind and gave it to Isa.

“See? She can already tell you're the irresponsible one.” Isa smirked. “Thank you very much, [Y/N]. We hope to see you soon.” With that, Isa dragged Lea away and you walked in the other direction home.

\-----

“My name is Ventus.” You took the boys hand and shook it. He had a firm grip and his hands were slightly calloused. You looked up to his eyes for a second. You took in the shade of blue before he realized you were staring. The two of you looked away quickly.

“I'm [Y/N].” You quickly let go of each other’s hands from the awkwardness.. “I see you beat up one of my best friends.” You look behind him to Lea on the ground. He was rubbing his butt in pain. Nearby, Isa was shaking his head and trying to find a potion.

“If you don't mind helping me out here…” Ventus gained your attention again. This time you got a look at his face. He had a gentle smile and pinchable cheeks. He was a very cute boy. “What world is this?”

“Welcome to Radiant Garden, Ventus!” You gestured to everything around you. Ventus looked very satisfied at the scenery. Soon, he said he had to look around alone, but he would be back shortly before leaving town.

\-----

You finished packing lunch for the festival when you heard a knock on your door. You walked over to open it to reveal Isa and Lea. The three of you had been friends for a while now.

Recently Ienzo had slowly stopped sending you letters. You still sent him food, hoping he was enjoying it. Your mother had also passed away. It was hard, but you turned the front of your house into a shop. You had gotten better at synthesis, so you would sell tiny trinkets and potions here and there to pay for food. Your house had already been paid off a while ago, so your only expense to worry about was food. Often, Lea or Isa's mom would send over groceries for you. You were very grateful for the assistance that they had given you.

You had become so enveloped in your work that you only viewed your friends as friends. There was never a moment that you would think of them in a romantic way. Well, that was a lie. You had a huge crush on Lea, but you didn't want to ruin your friendship with the boys by pursuing anything. That and...Lea was very oblivious. 

“You're here already?” You said to the boys. You decided to pretend that you weren't ready. “I haven't even made our lunches!” You threw your hands up in the air.

“We can come back later if we're too early.” Lea said. You began to laugh as you pulled out the lunches from behind your back. 

“I'm always prepared. I'm not you, Lea.” You gained a laugh from Isa at the joke. It got quiet for a few moments and the atmosphere felt awkward. Isa blushed and cleared his throat. You caught yourself staring at Lea and began to blush yourself. You decided to turn around and pretend you forgot something. “Be right back!” You shouted before running into your room.

Sure, Lea was dense, but so were you. In the living room, Lea and Isa were showing each other presents that they had gotten for you. Today would be a fun, but sad day. They had great news, they would become apprentices at the castle. But that meant that wouldn't be able to see you often. In your room, you were also preparing to tell the boys something. You would soon be going to synthesis school, which would mean you couldn't see them for a while.

“Hey, [Y/N], are you alright in there?” You could hear Lea say. You straightened out your dress before coming out. You wondered what would happen.

\-----

“I can't see you as much anymore so, here.” You grabbed the locket from Isa. He looked down at you with sorrow in his eyes. It was sad how fate had to separate the two of you. You looked down at what he had given you.

It was a silver locket. One side had a picture him and the other side was Lea. You held it close to your heart as you tried to keep the tears from slipping down your cheeks.

“Aw! Now I'll never forget both of my best friends!” You hugged the Isa and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I guess this is goodbye, huh?” You tried to act like your normal self and smile to hide the emotions that you were feeling deep down. You didn’t want to leave your best friends.

“I'm afraid it is. I hope your new shop will continue to prosper. Goodbye, [Y/N].” He started to walk away then turned back for a second. “Please don't forget about us...about me.” You nodded and waved goodbye as he walked out of your shop and out into the world.

“Wait, Isa!” You called. He turned around and raised an eyebrow. You tried your best to not let your voice crack as you finally let the tears fall. “Come back to me, promise?” 

“Promise.” You ran up to him and kissed his cheek, saying goodbye. 

\-----

You closed your journal of memories. You decided that writing down what you remembered would help you with to dizzy spells. As you recalled certain memories, you realized that they weren't exactly how you first saw them with the influence of Memory's Skyscraper. You could remember more details and exactly what was was said. This journal would be very special to you. Maybe you'd write in it again someday. Roxas had a journal too, you wondered where it was. Had Axel taken it?

The pain in your head returned. You waited desperately for it to finally be replaced with the dizziness. You got up from your desk and stumbled over to your bed.

Right...stop thinking about Roxas. You were starting to realize what thoughts would trigger these spells.

\-----

Somewhere, your heartless was writhing in agony.

As Namine pieced together the final bits of Sora, she had to rearrange the memories that Xion and Roxas had of you. Those weren't Sora's memories, so they weren't needed. They were cast off to the side in incomplete chains.

Every time these memories were taken away from the main chain, it harmed your heartless. She was in far more pain than you were in. It was beyond your imagination of the pain scale. Namine tried to eliminate this darkness as she worked. She knew who you were and who your heartless was. She purposely was trying to weaken your heartless to protect you. She also tried to send you little hints through these dizzy spells. Someday, she wanted you to help Sora. It was the least she could do to repay for her debts to him.

And now the pieces were finished.


	32. Chapter XXXII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finals are done! I’m finally free to write again. I’ve missed you all. Please remember to comment as they literally feed me energy.
> 
> By the way, hi Joel.

The echo of soft sobs wandered through the castle halls. Not many could hear them, but those who could knew exactly who it was. Outside of the room stood two former friends who looked at each other with helplessness across their faces. The red haired man extended his hand towards the doorknob but was stopped by the blue haired man.

“We can’t just let her go on like this.” Axel protested. He yanked his hand from Saix and extended it towards the door again. “She needs our help.”

“She needs time to herself.” Saix argued. Axel sighed and put his hands on Saix’s shoulders.

“When girls say they want to be left alone, they don’t actually want to be left alone. Now swallow any hard feelings you have about me or Roxas and let’s help [Y/N].” Saix turned his head away and looked towards the door.

“She’s crying over one of them.” Saix said. He took Axel’s hands off of him.

“Who?” Axel questioned.

“It’s obvious. Either Zexion or Roxas. She loved them.” Axel’s face grew a hard look.

“Do you think this is some kind of competition? Don’t play dumb, we both know what’s been happening here. Those two are gone now and [Y/N] has been giving her emotions to us. There’s a reason why she won’t ever answer the question when it’s asked.” Saix scoffed, not wanting to admit that Axel was right. [Y/N] had been pinning the old two friends against each other. It was as if her heart couldn’t figure out what it wanted. She was stuck from choosing between her two friends.

“If it’s a competition, then let the games begin.” Saix said. Axel’s face filled with anger. He opened his mouth, ready to argue until Demyx walked past the two. Saix and Axel broke away from their stare down to look at Demyx.

“What are you guys doing here? It’s really late.” He said before opening [Y/N]’s door and walking in. “[Y/N], what’s wrong?” Were the last words Axel and Saix heard before Demyx closed the door.

“Did he just...?” Axel questioned.

“He did…” Saix answered.

\-----

“Go away.” You said as you buried your face into your pillow. You felt your bed move from Demyx sitting at the end.

“[Y/N], half of the castle can hear you crying.” Demyx said. 

“They can?” You asked. You sat up slowly, holding your pillow in front of your body. Half of your face was still buried in the fluffy rectangle.

“Saix and Axel are out there right now wondering what’s wrong.” You looked up to Demyx with a sad face.

“It’s embarrassing…” You said into the pillow. Demyx tried not to laugh from the muffled sound of your voice.

“You’re telling me...Demyx...that something is embarrassing? How many times a week do I get in trouble for breaking something?” You giggled into your pillow, remembering a few of those times. One of them happened to leave the castle toastless for the week. You missed that toaster.

“Okay...I just had a dream about a friend. So I wrote down a few memories of my friends as I grew up. It’s hard to believe that we’re all dead now, but Zexion and Roxas are gone forever.” Demyx sighed.

“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t even remember my real name. Things are...spotty. Maybe I’m just choosing not to remember.” Demyx scratched his head.

“Are you trying to make yourself sound mysterious?” You asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“Did you stop crying?” You realized that you finished a while ago, but had never noticed. “See, whatever works to help you!” Demyx stood up. “I think I should go now. You should rest, tomorrow is a big day. Xigbar said so. We have to be in Radiant Garden by noon.” 

“You’re right.” You said. “If...Saix and Axel are still out there, can you tell them I’ll see them tomorrow?” Demyx nodded and smiled before leaving your room.

\-----

“So what are we waiting for?” You whispered to Demyx. He looked down to you and reached for your hood. He put it over your head then did the same to his. You looked around to see that everyone already had their hoods on as well.

“We’re making a grand entrance.” Demyx explained. You nodded then started looking around for Saix and Axel. The two had ignored you all morning when you had tried to knock on their doors. You wondered if they were mad about you hanging out with Demyx today after he cheered you up the night before.

“Now.” You heard before seeing dark corridors opening up. You looked to Demyx to created his own. You began to create your own, hoping that you would arrive in the right spot. Demyx then took your hand and put it down. He created a portal for you then gave you a thumbs up. You walked through.

You were all standing on a ledge. You gulped, it was a very high ledge. Looking around, you tried to figure out what everyone was looking at until you saw a boy at the bottom of the cliff. Your eyes widened at the sight of a keyblade. Could he be…?

“Is that Riku?” You whispered to Demyx.

“That’s Sora.” Demyx whispered back. You sighed as you watched the Superior and others argue with the boy and his friends. He looked very upset with your group and you started to doubt the efforts of the organization yet again. Were you really the good guys…?

After a while, members began to dark corridor themselves away. You watched as your friends and colleagues disappeared. You looked down to see Xigbar messing around some more with the boy. You crouched down as your tried to eavesdrop. Should you intimidate him too? I mean, you are number VI. 

When Xigbar left, you decided to take action. You created a dark corridor then stepped out behind the confused boy. It took awhile before someone noticed you.

“Sora, look!” One of his friends pointed out.

“Another one!?” Sora turned to you and prepared to fight. You tried to take a good look at him, remembering Roxas. You brought your hand up to Sora as if to tell him to back down.

“I’m not here to fight.” You said.

“What? You’re gonna send your lackeys after me?” He gripped on his keyblade harder. You could see his knuckles turn white. You decided to surprise him. You used stopga to give yourself a few seconds to walk behind Sora. You placed a hand on his shoulder and inched your hooded face close to his ear. You waited for the magic to wear off before whispering.

“I’ve missed you, Roxas.” Sora then stepped back in fear.

“How did you...?!” You chuckled for a bit before taking a few steps back from Sora and his group. You looked at each of their faces. They were all filled with fear. You took a few more steps back, suddenly fearful yourself. Fearful of yourself. Who were you becoming?

“I figured you’d know how to do that little trick too.” You then summoned your keyblade. “Since we’re one and the same.” Sora gasped.

“A keyblade?” He then put his guard up again. You let go of your keyblade and it vanished.

“I have to go now, but I hope to see you soon.” You then created a dark corridor. You started to walk through before looking back towards Sora and his friends once more. “I hope you’re happy, Roxas.” You then stepped through and quickly closed the portal behind you. You stepped into the realm between portals. It was cold here.

“I’m sure Roxas is happy now.” You looked up to see Axel walking towards you.

“You waited for me?” You asked. Axel nodded his head.

“I knew it’d be hard for you.” You stared at his face in silence for a few moments. You then let yourself fall into his arms as a few tears started to fall. Axel put a hand behind your head and let your body lean into him.  
“I miss him. He was...so much like Ventus.” You murmured into his coat.

“I know, [Y/N], I know.” But little did you know, that a tear fell from Axel’s face to the ground.


	33. Chapter XXXIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of the hardest things for me is trying to bring myself to replay KHIII. 
> 
> Anyways, I wrote this after replaying KHIII and crying.

The sound of a pencil scribbling against paper echoed throughout the small room. At a desk sat Saix as he wrote out a very detailed report. When he finally finished he threw the pencil against the desk then stood up. He created a dark corridor, leading to wherever you were. He walked through into your room where you laid on the bed flipping through an old scrapbook. Your fingers stopped to touch a photo of you and Ienzo as children.

“Number VI.” Saix spoke. You looked up, startled at the interruption, before closing the scrapbook and setting it down on the bed next to you.

“Saix.” You replied. You then got an idea and picked the scrapbook back up. You had been working very hard on finding old photos of your past and placing them in this very book. You had looked in your old house as well as Isa and Lea’s. It also took some snooping around old places in your homeworld that may have held a photo or two on their walls.

“We have business to attend to.” Saix said as he approached you. You searched the pages until you finally found a photo of you, Isa, and Lea eating at a pizza parlor. You flipped the book towards him.

“Remember?” You asked him. Saix sighed before sitting down next to you.

“Difficult times are approaching. We have to prepare for the final stretch.” He explained. He smiled at the photo then decided to flip a page. He saw the picture of you with Ienzo then winced. It hurt him to remember that Ienzo came before him and Lea. You had a stronger connection to him. “Here, I have your mission assignments as we prepare to finish Kingdom Hearts.” Saix handed you the paper he was working on before. You looked it over.

“So basically I’m accompanying everyone at their assigned worlds?” You questioned, but you already knew the answer. You looked over the world assignments and raised a brow. “What about you and Axel?” 

“We are to investigate Twilight Town if needed, otherwise we are to remain here.” He explained. 

“But that’s not fair.” You said. “You two have much right to your own worlds as Luxord does. He’s number X. You two are VII and VIII.” Saix shook his head.

“We’re important to the Superior.” You thought about it for a moment.

“Right. Axel’s the hitman and you’re the secretary.” You laughed. 

“Secretary?!” Saix questioned. He began to become flustered and mad, but it was soon replaced with a smile. Saix placed a hand on your shoulder. “[Y/N], I want you to know…”

“Yes?” You asked as he trailed off.

“Whether all of this works or not, you make me feel as if I have a heart.” Saix was looking down into his lap. He suddenly seemed nervous, which was very unlike his usual self. He gripped his coat then cleared his throat. “I may not have felt true love as a Somebody, but I think this is what it would have felt like.” He closed his eyes shut, waiting for a response. You began to laugh and Saix opened his eyes to look at you. “What’s so funny?!” He shouted in protest.

You wiped a tear from your laughter. “It’s just...you’re such a liar.” You grabbed your stomach and began to laugh more.

“I am not lying!” He shouted. You put a hand on his shoulder as you began to calm down your second laughing fit.

“Isa, you know what true love is.” The atmosphere turned serious as Saix’s face was wiped from anger. “Here.” You flipped the scrapbook a few pages until you found a picture that Lea had took back when he tried to be a photographer for a week. In the photo, Isa was staring at you as you watched the sunset from the top of your old house’s roof. You pointed to his face. “Now try to tell me that isn’t the face of someone who is completely devoted for this girl right here.” You then pointed to yourself.

“I…” Saix began, but couldn’t finish.

“I know now, Isa. I didn’t back then but I understand now.” You smiled down at the photo.

“I’m...sorry.” Saix began. “Things have been difficult lately between Axel and I. We’ve started a...competition of sorts.” 

“A competition?” You questioned. Oh no. It was coming back once again to bite you in the ass. You sighed as you realized what was happening. You knew it would happen too, but here you were sitting along for the ride. You had pinned two of your best friends against each other for you heart. But you didn’t even have a heart. Your frown turned into a smirk as you let your curiosity get the best of you. “Let the best man win.” You said. You wondered how much further you could take it, even if you would regret the results.

Saix opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by someone else barging into your room.

“[Y/N], are you ready for part two?” Demyx called as he casually walked into your room. Saix shut his mouth and looked back and forth between you and Demyx. His face formed into a scowl. 

“Number IX. If you could excuse us for a moment.” Saix commanded. Demyx looked back and forth between you two before putting his hands up in defense and slowly backing away.

“I’ll just wait outside your door then…” He said. When he was out of the room, Saix turned his face back towards you.

“I assure you, this won’t end well.” 

You winced at his comment. “I...I know.” 

“If it means your happiness, I will accept defeat. However…” Saix stood up and created a dark corridor. “I won’t lose easily.” He then walked into the portal. It shut behind him. You picked up the scrapbook and looked back to the picture of Isa staring at you. A tear fell onto the paper. 

“Whoa, are you okay?” You jumped where you sat and immediately shut the book closed. You looked up to see Demyx.

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but I heard Saix leave so I figured it was safe to come back inside.” He sat down where Saix was a few moments ago. “We don’t have to go today if you don’t want to.” He said. 

“Would it be fine to postpone the trip?” You asked. Demyx nodded his head. He then took notice to your scrapbook.

“Can I?” He asked. You looked down to the scrapbook then handed it to him. He began to flip through the pages. “You had some life, huh?” He said as he continued to flip. “Is this baby Zexion?!” He shouted.

“We were kids, not babies.” You said. Demyx laughed and continued to flip the pages. He stopped at a photo of you, alone in your shop.

“Who took this?” He asked. 

“Some Moogle.” You answered. He nodded and suddenly became lost in thought.

“You were...lonely for a while.” He said. “Without the three of them.” You finally realized what he was getting at. 

“It was, but after awhile I almost forgot about them all. They were always in the back of my mind though.” You took the book then set it down on your nightstand. “Demyx, I have some business to attend to. I’ll see you soon.” You picked up the paper Saix had given you then pointed to the spot mentioning your mission with Demyx. “See? We have a mission together very soon.” Demyx gave you a half smile before walking towards your door.

“I understand. I’ll see you soon.” He said before leaving. 

You sat in your room, alone. You wondered why you would act in the moment to make things go your way. Maybe if you had your heart back, you could make rational decisions. You sat there for a few moments, wondering what you were becoming. Then you came to the self realization that your heartless was still out there and your actions could be a reflection of her behavior. 

“That sounds stupid.” You thought to yourself. You sighed. If Zexion were here he’d be able to help you make out why your behavior had been changing lately. Sometimes you felt...evil.

\-----

“I talked to her.” Saix said as he exited a dark corridor. He sat down on the ledge of the clock tower at Twilight Town, where Axel already was. Axel looked to his friend and raised an eyebrow.

“What did she say?” He asked. In his hand was a sea salt ice cream stick. Whether it was a winner or not was unknown.

“She’s completely aware of her actions. However…” Saix started to trail off. Perhaps to think of how to word what he was about to say.

“What?” Axel asked impatiently.

“Something seems off.” He thought for a moment. She’s not herself.” Saix said. He had felt that something was off the day he found out that you had been two timing.

“Of course she’s not.” Axel scoffed. [Y/N] would never do any of this. She’d rather be alone than have to choo-” Axel stopped himself as he realized what was off.

“You answered your own question.” Saix smirked.

“I hate to say it...but you’re right.” Axel sneered. There was no way that you could ever bring yourself to choose between your friends. You would have rather been alone than stuck with the choice between the two. It wasn’t you who was off, it was them. They had put you in this position themselves by making you try to choose. With every word of confession and every forced kiss, they had pushed you into a corner where you couldn’t make your own choice.

“Well, it was fun while it lasted.” Saix said as he stood up. Axel looked up to his friend was a confused look on his face.

“What are you talking about?” Axel stood up as well.

“Goodbye, Lea.” Saix created a dark corridor. He turned back to face Axel, who still looked very confused. Saix then faced the dark corridor again, promising himself no to look back as he finally sealed the deal. “Our friendship ceases to exist.” He walked into the corridor and it closed behind him, leaving Axel alone at the clock tower once again.

“Goodbye, Isa…” Axel said as he sat back down. “You’ve changed.” He let the stick fall to the ground. It fell quite aways before hitting the ground face up. The stick read “winner”.

\-----

“Rise and shine!” Your sleeping form was woken up by a loud shout. You sat up in bed as you tried to make out who the voice belonged to, but you didn’t see anyone. “I said, up and at ‘em!” The voice shouted again. You looked around until you decided to look up where you found Xigbar hanging from your ceiling.

“Haven’t you heard of knocking?!” You shouted. You quickly got up to put your coat on. 

“Last time I checked you hated me, so we can skip the formalities.” Xigbar said. You gave out a huff.

“I never said I hated you. You’ve done some things I haven’t liked, but in the end you’re Number II and I’m Number VI and you have to be a mandated reporter or whatever.” You explained. Xigbar burst into laughter.

“Mandated reporter? This isn’t preschool, sweetie.” He teleported to the ground then opened a dark corridor. “Big mission. Time to wreck a little havoc in a place. Make some heartless appear, nothing much. Try not to be sighted.” He explained.

“Make some heartless appear?” You questioned. Xigbar shook a finger at you.

“Don’t tell me you haven’t figured it out yet?” He said. “You can summon dusks and your personal lackeys but you can’t get some heartless to form? Jeez.” He scratched the back of his head. “I guess you’re not up for the job…”

“No!” He turned around before he could enter the dark corridor and raised a brow. “I can do it!”

“Now that’s what I like to hear.”


	34. Chapter XXXIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay a double update this weekend. Also here are some notes from the mind of the author: Last chapter Saix confessed in a sort of Saix-y way. I’ve noticed that the closer the Organization gets to Kingdom Hearts, the more careless and brutal his personality becomes. Him officially ending his friendship with Axel helps signify this.
> 
> The reader is feeling out of character. The true meaning of this is simply because she doesn’t have a heart. She never truly loved others romantically (besides her small crush on Lea) when she was a Somebody, so it is hard for her to manifest what true love feels like. She has an understanding of friendship love, thus making her Nobody confused at these new feelings she knows should be there. She is hurting herself and others in her own confusion. 
> 
> If some of you are wondering more about interactions let me clear some things up on relationships between the reader and every member of the organization: *Xemnas: She finds him very sketchy, and doesn’t know if she can trust him. *Xigbar: She forgives him for his actions before as she understands it’s his job to make reports. She feels as if she could have dated him if he were younger and they were Somebodies. *Xaldin/Vexen/Lexaeus: She sees him as one of her Superiors. Nothing more or less. *Zexion: She loved him greatly as she knew him since they were very young. This is her strongest form of friendship love. *Saix: She understands that he was infatuated with her when they were Somebodies. Saix greatly relies on his memories of love when he interacts with the reader. The reader felt friendship love for Saix, and never would have imagined being with him if it weren’t for being Nobodies. *Axel: The reader had a crush on him in the past. She remembers this crush, although it wasn’t the same when they kissed. She now feels friendship love for him as she can’t comprehend anything more than a crush. *Demyx: The reader sees Demyx as a friend. Since she didn’t know him in the past, she enjoys venting to him as he is an outside opinion. She tries to forget the time he confessed. *Luxord/Marluxia: The reader could comfortably make small talk with these members. *Larxene: The reader was friends with her during her time with the organization. They weren’t particularly close, so she didn’t mourn her death as much as others. *Roxas: The reader loved him like a little brother. It was similar to her feelings of Zexion when they were kids. She often wanted to protect him and found herself as a failure when Roxas left. She can’t seem to forgive herself. *Xion: Same as Roxas, but she is now forgotten.
> 
> I hope that helps summarize at what point we are. We are still at the beginning of KHII at this point in the story.

“Y’know, you’re a real riot.” Xigbar said as the two of you RTC’d. You followed him into the portal that led back to the castle.

The mission was done and you had successfully summoned heartless. It was very different from summoning Nobodies. You couldn’t just think about it then it happened. No, it was more like channeling your inner darkness until they appeared. And the heartless didn’t listen to you like your Nobodies did. They just started to create chaos on their own. 

“What are you talking about?” You questioned Xigbar. He began to laugh.

“You and your little friends. You take ‘pretending to have a heart’ to a whole new level.” You furrowed your brows at him. “Oh? Did I strike a nerve?” He asked sarcastically. You replied anyways.

“It’s nice to remember feelings. It helps us feel complete.” You explained. Xigbar scoffed.

“Whatever you say, Number VI. In the end, all you’re doing in helping them remember all the bad things.” Xigbar looked to your eyes to make sure he was getting through to you. “Pain, sorrow, regret. That’s all your fault, sweetcheeks.” 

“I...know.” You said. The portal was clear in the distance. You sped up to the end and found yourself finally back at the castle. 

“Poison stings, little miss Toxic Synthesis.” Xigbar said as he walked past you. You rolled your eyes. 

“Number VI.” You turned away from scowling at Xigbar’s teasing to be met with the golden eyes of Xemnas. If you had a heart, it would have dropped at that moment.

“Lord Xemnas.” You said. Xemnas gave you a smile. It wasn’t genuine. It felt very forced. 

“I see your missions are carrying out well.” He said. Was he...trying to make small talk? There was no way. He had a motive behind his words.

“Yes, but my most recent mission…” You locked eyes with him for a moment, suddenly very scared to tell him what was on your mind. “If I’m here to collect hearts, then why am I created more heartless without defeating them?” You asked. Xemnas raised an eyebrow.

“You haven’t noticed the lack of heartless lately?” He questioned. He didn’t wait for you to answer. “You are no longer our only keyblade bearer. Sora and Riku are out there collecting hearts as well. We must keep the supply of hearts coming.” He explained. You suddenly felt very stupid.

“Are we the-” Before you could ask if you were the bad guys, it was as if Saix came as the right time. Asking that question could have gotten you turned into a dusk.

“Superior. I have the mission report from Xigbar and [Y/N].” Saix handed a piece of paper to Xemnas. He looked at you before facing Xemnas again.

“Ah, very well done, [Y/N].” Xemnas said. He then motioned for you to go away.

“Number VI, let us leave the Superior be. He is very busy as of late.” Saix then led you out of the hallway and deeper into the castle. “Have you no brain?” Saix finally said when he felt the two of you were far enough.

“Last time I checked.” You said in protest. Saix rolled his eyes.

“Whether we’re the good guys or the bad guys, that’s not something you go around questioning to your superiors. Especially our main boss!” Saix began to shout. He looked down at your face and realized he needed to lower his voice. “I’m sorry, [Y/N]. It’s just...you’re fourth in charge. You have to uphold yourself to a higher standard.” 

“You’re right, Isa.” Saix looked up to you and you shook your head. “I mean Saix.” He raised an eyebrow. “Really? Fine then, Number VII.”

“I know it’ll be hard at first, but we must uphold our reputation.” Saix cleared his throat.

“Well then, I’ll be off now Number VII.” You smiled before walking away. 

\-----

“So I’m gonna go intimidate some pots and pans?” You raised an eyebrow at Xaldin’s request. He shook his head before sighing.

“Just...go get information on the beast!” He commanded before sending you off. You went off in a huff and created a dark corridor. “He said they were in the dungeon.” You thought as you tried to manifest it in your mind. You walked through the dark corridor, hoping it would take you to your desired area in the castle. You walked out to see a bunch of...appliances and small furniture huddled in the corner.

“It’s another black coat!” One of them shouted. They all began to panic as you tried to gain their attention.

“I’m not gonna hurt you, I just- Ah!” You shouted as you almost tripped over a...clock? You picked him up and set him down on a chair. “You seem civilized enough to answer my question.”

“I refuse to speak! Not after you handled me like that!” He shouted in protest. You sighed and rubbed your temples.

“Look, I just want to know what’s with the beast and why he acts the way he does. We just want to...help him.” You said. Even you didn’t believe that for one second, but maybe they would.

“Well, she seems nice enough.” A teapot said. The clock shook his head no.

“Not after what her friend did! I don’t trust her!” He said. He crossed his little arms.

“She doesn’t seem anything like him.” The candlebra spoke. You nodded your head in agreement, hoping that you were getting somewhere. The clock sighed before finally giving in.

“You see, the master is under a spell that affects us too. If he can’t find true love and be loved in return before the rose fully wilts, then we’ll all be stuck like this forever.” He explained. You shook your head in understandment.

“So all of you were human once?” You asked. They all nodded. “I’ll see what we can do.” You then left the dungeon to report to Xaldin. You found him outside of the castle, watching from afar.

“That was quick.” He said. You smirked.

“The beast is under a spell. It all has to do with the rose.” You said. Xaldin smirked and created a dark corridor.

“Well done. Your services are no longer needed here.” He said. He disappeared into the dark corridor. In the distance you could hear familiar voices. You hid behind a bush and tried to look for the owners of the bush. You caught a glimpse of an familiar object and you automatically knew.

“Sora.”

\-----

You stood in the private library, surrounded by documents. You began to gather new mission reports to read. You wanted to know more about Sora and just exactly the organization was doing with him. You sat down and organized the papers before beginning to read.

After a while your eyes were sore and your head was throbbing, but you had an understanding of the situation. You were just treating Sora the same way you were with Roxas. His mission would be to collect hearts, but the organization had to create darkness for heartless to appear so that he could release those hearts.

“Studying hard?” You looked up to see Axel leaning against a bookshelf.

“You could write complete sentences in your reports.” You said. You decided to add on as Saix’s voice echoed in your head. “Number VIII.”

“What’s with the formalities? It’s just me.” Axel scoffed. You shook your head.

“We have to uphold a standard…” You trailed off. 

“Did Saix tell you that?” You guiltily nodded and Axel began to laugh. “Alright, alright. I understand if it’s in front of someone else, but I just see you and me here.” 

“What are you really here for?” You asked. The room’s atmosphere suddenly became tense.

“I’m...thinking about pulling a Roxas.” Axel said. You looked up at him in shock.

“They’ll kill you.” You said. “And knowing how sick they are, they’ll make me and Saix do it.” You shivered at the thought.

“I’m sure you’ve seen how dull it’s gotten around here. We aren’t getting anywhere without Roxas.” Axel continued. You sighed and stood up from your place at the table. You walked over to Axel and got in his face.

“Don’t press me, Number VIII.” Axel raised an eyebrow and smirked. You shook your head, hoping to wipe the smirk off of his face. “You are to stay here and obey orders from your higher ups. Do I make myself clear?”

“You can’t be seri-”

“I’m not losing another friend!” You shouted. “We’re going to get our hearts back, we’ll move back to Radiant Garden with Saix, we’ll have our happily ever after, and you’re gonna like it!” You said. Axel shook his head then placed a hand on your shoulder.

“Fine. If it means that much to you, I’ll stay...for now.” You glared at Axel. He put his hands up in defense. “Whatever you say, Number VI.” 

You sighed. “I don’t believe in Xemnas one bit, but…” You materialized your keyblade. “I trust the keyblade.” You made it disappear then looked to Axel once more. “So please, believe in me.” 

“So you agree something is fishy?” He said.

“We should stop talking about this before someone else hears.” Axel nodded his head in agreement.

“I’ll see you later then, Number VI.” And with that Axel created a dark corridor and left. You walked back to the table and sat down. You let your head sit in your hands as you reflected on what had just happened. You sighed then reached into your pocket, pulling out your handwritten mission list from Saix. Your next mission would be with Demyx soon. You got up and created a dark corridor, leading into his room.

“Number IX, we have a mission tomorrow and I-” You looked up to see Demyx practicing his sitar, naked. Very naked. “Why are you…?” You questioned.

“It helps the creative juices flow.” He said. You were very glad that the base of his sitar was enough to cover most of his lower body. You shook your head then turned away. 

“Please...just dress dude so we can talk about our mission.” You said, fully dropping your superior act. You could heard shuffling around and zippers being zipped. You turned around when Demyx tapped you on the shoulder.

“So we have a mission tomorrow?” He asked.

“You don’t even know?!” You shouted. Demyx laughed nervously and scratched the back of his head. “Well, it’s a good thing I’m here then.” You sat down on a nearby chair and looked down at your paper. “It says here that we have to go to Olympus and-”

“Oh! That mission!” Demyx pulled out a paper from his pocket and continued reading. “We have to steal this medallion thingy and tease Sora with it.” He continued. 

“And how are we going to go about that? Olympus is filled with gods, very powerful beings in Olympus.” You explained. Demyx nodded his head then seemed to be lost in thought for a while.

“We’ll do what I do best! Sneaking around!”

\-----

“I thought you said you were good at sneaking!” You shouted as you and Demyx ran away from an army of angry gods. You screamed as you dodged lightning bolts and arrows. A sword flew past your face and your heart would have dropped if you had one.

“I am!” Demyx shouted. He dodged another arrow and it scraped against the top of his hair. He screamed. “Or at least I thought I was!” The two of your continued to run until you remembered that you were Nobodies and all you had to do was create a dark corridor.

“Come here!” You shouted as you pulled Demyx by the arm. You dragged him past a corner and hurried up to create a dark corridor. You threw him into it then followed, quickly closing it behind you. Half of an arrow fell out on the other side where you and Demyx safely sat, panting.

“Oh yeah...huh. We could...do that.” He said between breaths.

“So what now?” You asked. Demyx looked for his mission report then read it over.

“Well it looks here that I can do the rest on my own.” He said. “Do you trust me?” He looked up to you with huge puppy dog eyes. You giggled then lightly punched him on the shoulder.

“Of course.” Demyx smiled then stood up. He extended an arm to help you up. You took his hand and he hoisted you onto your feet. “Good luck.” You smiled. Demyx saluted you goodbye before creating a dark corridor and disappearing.

In the distance you heard voices. You look behind you to see a group walking around confused. You ducked behind a rock and watched. It was Sora and his friends again. You shook your head as you watched him wander around aimlessly with his keyblade. Creating a dark corridor, you slipped out of the scene.

\-----

Somewhere in the Underworld lied a great darkness. She stood close but far as she watched Sora. She smirked, thinking of a plan to finally make her return. 

“Oh poor, naive, clueless Sora.”


	35. Chapter XXXV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been a while since I’ve written a nice, cute, humorous chapter. Cherish it now before the next inevitable death that’s coming up. It’s also super long which is very unlike me.
> 
> Hey readers, I have a tiny PSA. I have a KH college AU that’s sort of like this story (reverse-harem like). There’s a lot of eligible bachelors that you go on blind dates with and the major I chose for characters are sometimes funny. It’s called “Destiny University.” If you loved the first chapter of this story (before it became a drama fest), then I think you’ll love this one.

Your room had to be the only one in the castle without a window. The kitchen, the conference room, and even the library had windows. But for some reason, whoever designed the castle decided that you didn’t deserve one. Because of this, you decided to find an area where you could look out a window, alone. You walked out of your room and began to wander the castle.

In few of the many hallways you had passed some of the highers ups and greeted them. You often wondered what their opinions were of you now that you had become quite skilled with the keyblade...or so you thought.

Before you could find a quiet area, you were disrupted by something not so quiet.

“[Y/N].” You turned to see Axel calling your name. He approached you and smiled. “I had the nicest dream.” You raised an eyebrow. “It was like old times, just you, Isa, and me enjoying each other’s company.” 

“Why would you dream such a pleasant thing for?” You smiled. Axel shrugged his shoulders.

“Dunno. Saix is a totally different person than Isa. And you…” He touched your nose with his finger. “You have also changed quite a lot.”

“I’ve...changed?” You tilted your head.

“You’re quite the brave and bold one now. I’d say you changed in a positive way, unlike Isa.” He explained.

“Why do you keep doing that?” You asked.

“Doing what?” He seemed confused.

“Talking badly about Isa. We were all friends in the past. When we get our hearts back, it’ll be just like the old days again.” Axel scoffed.

“Saix is beyond saving, [Y/N]. Get real.” Axel began to walk closer to you, hoping to bring you to your senses.

“You’ve changed too, Axel.” You sighed. “But that’s okay. We all did. We all grew up. And I still believe that we can all be friends again someday.” You smiled.

“You’re always so optimistic.” Axel smiled. “But you have to be careful. I don’t want that optimism getting you hurt.” You rolled your eyes. “Hey...are you busy right now?” Axel asked. You shook your head no. “How about we go somewhere for old times sake?”

“And where would that be?” You asked. Axel created a dark corridor and motioned for you to follow him.

“Why don’t you find out?” He smirked. You looked around to make sure no one else was watching, before following him into the portal. It shut behind the two of you and you walked through the portal realm for a moment before exiting where Axel dragged you out.

“What’s that smell?” You asked. The two of you seemed to be behind a building. There were dumpsters and a few rats digging through said trash.

“We have to put our hoods up.” Axel said as he raised his. You carefully put yours on before following him through an alley to the front of the building. You finally got a good look at the place. 

“The pizza parlor...from when we were kids.” You smiled, thinking of the picture that you had scavenged for your scrapbook. You took Axel’s hand and led him inside before he could say a word. You walked up to the counter and ordered what you used to always get when you were younger. A [favorite pizza]. You smiled and walked over to the soda machine to fill your cup with [favorite soda] while Axel ordered his food. You sat down in the usual spot and set your cup down.

You looked around suddenly remembering more than the picture had allowed you to. You looked over to the games you three would play and wondered if your high scores were still on there. You decided to get up and check just as Axel set down his cup. He raised a brow as he followed you over to the game section. 

“I wonder if it’s still there.” You said out loud. You waited in front of the screen for the top scores list to show up. When it finally did, you saw Isa and Lea printed within the top 5. Yours was nowhere to be seen. “I guess someone beat me.” You shrugged. You went back over to your seat. Axel followed you and sat down across from you.

“Y’know [Y/N]...ever since you came into the organization I imagined having fun with you again at places like this. I thought everything would go back to the way it was. I even thought Saix would start to be a better friends to me.” Axel began to explain.

“I’m sorry...I didn’t remember anything soon enough.” You apologized. Axel shook his head.

“It was sorta nice.” He leaned his head against his hand. His elbow was propped onto the table. “I got to meet you all over again. Make Saix jealous all over again. And I got to...remember a lot of feelings all over again.” He didn’t smile or smirk.

“I wish I could say the same.” You admitted. “When I finally started to remember, I was so happy but I also felt so horrible. To think of all the negative feelings I made the three of you remember when I came in with no memories.” You sighed and swirled a fingers around the rim of your cup. “I couldn’t believe that we didn’t have hearts with all off the feelings I remembered. I only wish I could remember one feeling…” You trailed off.

“And what’s that?” Axel asked.

“I...it’s nothing.” You tried to brush it away.

“No feeling is nothing, [Y/N]. What do you regret?” He pressed.

“I’ve never...truly felt love. So it confuses me. I thought I’d have my happily ever after with someone...but I can’t remember a feeling I’ve never felt.” Before Axel could answer, a worker came with your orders and set it down. The two of you began to slightly drool at the sight of the pizza on the table. 

“Let’s save the water works for another time.” Axel said as he picked up a slice and began to dig in. You nodded as your began to eat your pizza as well.

Soon, most of it was gone on both plates except for a few stray toppings that has fell off. You rubbed your belly, remembering what it was like to feel full. Around this time, Isa would scold you and Lea for eating too much and not saving any leftovers for tomorrow’s lunch. You began to giggle to yourself at the thought.

“What?” Axel questioned, suddenly intrigued.

“How can you eat like that without saving anything for the next day?” You tried to say it in your best Isa voice. Axel began to instantly laugh as he recognized who you were imitating. “I promise Axel, it’ll all go back to the way it was.” You smiled.

“Promise?” Axel held out his pinkie for you to grab with your own. You giggled before completing the pinkie promise.

“I bet my heart on it.”

\-----

“Sunscreen?”

“Check.”

“Sunglasses?”

“Check.”

“Tickets?”

“Check. And that should be everything.” You smiled as you tucked everything away into a backpack. You handed it to Demyx who groaned as he put it on.

“Do I have to wear it?” He asked.

“Last time I check you asked me on this date, so yes.” You patted the backpack and smiled. Demyx gave you a half hearted side grin before creating a dark corridor.

“Do you think we’ll be safe leaving our coats here this time?” He questioned. You nodded your head and materialized your keyblade.

“I’m pretty sure this spell will work just long enough for us to walk through the portal.” You casted the spell with your keyblade before making it disappear. You smiled before running into the dark corridor and hopping out in front of the bush from last time. Demyx stumbled out after you, almost tripping with the backpack.

“Disneytown part two is a go!” Demyx shouted. You giggled and followed him as he began to walk towards the town. You brought out a map as the two of you walked to view what you had circled for this time. There were a lot of things you had missed that you for sure needed to try this time. You had Space Mountain, Splash Mountain, and Jungle Cruise circled the biggest. In small circles were Astroblasters, Submarine Voyage, and Pirate’s Lair. The two of you had even called in to reserve a spot to eat dinner at. It was supposedly “the coolest place of them all” to eat according to Demyx.

“So where to first?” You asked as the two of you waited in line to get in. You watched as Demyx set the backpack on a table to be searched before picking it back up and walked through. You raised an eyebrow, that was different than last time.

“I’m thinking we go soft and work our way up to the best things on the list.” Demyx said.

“I was thinking of going in order of the map so maybe we can cover more things in less time.” You explained. Demyx reached for the tickets from his backpack and gave them to the worker. The two of you walked into the town.

“That sounds good too.” Demyx admitted. “So what would be first then?” He asked.

“Either Space Mountain or Jungle Cruise depending on which way we go.” You said, looking at the map. Suddenly Demyx grabbed your wrist and led you through the crowds of people.

“Jungle Cruise it is!” He said. Before long, the two of you were in line for the ride. You realized that it was an actual boat and gave a soft giggle.

“You feel more comfortable because of the water?” You questioned. Demyx looked up to you and gasped.

“How did you know?!” He asked. You tried to draw a sitar in the air with your fingers. “Oh...right. I forgot we fight almost everyday of our nonexistent lives.” The worker then called to fill up the next boat and the two of you were lucky enough to get on. You were very cramped in the boat to the point where your legs were touching, but you rather have been close to Demyx than a stranger. The two of you listened at the “tour guide” steered you through the river showing you a lot of animatronics on the way. You laughed like a hyena when Demyx got scared from the fake piranhas. When the ride was done, Demyx was already all shooken up.

“Fake piranhas, Demyx.” You said. He groaned.

“How was I supposed to know? I control water not the things inside of it, you would be scared too!” He protested. You chuckled as you led him towards the next ride you had circled.

“Are you ready for pirates?” You asked.

“Xigbar and Luxord are here?!” Demyx looked frightened as he suddenly looked all around, startled.

“No silly, the play island over there.” You pointed to the middle of the manmade lake. Demyx sighed in relief. You shook your head and led him to the small platform that would take you across. The two of you packed onto the platform like sardines with a bunch of kids and their parents. When you got to the other side the two of you instantly ran off to look around the island together. You crawled and climbed when you weren’t supposed to and made the most out of the small island. At one point a skeleton animatronic actually frightened you and Demyx would not let you live it down on the way back from the island.

“I didn’t see it!” You said. Demyx continued to poke fun at you after you stepped foot onto real land. You shook your head then looked back to the map, a smirk forming on your face. You grabbed Demyx’s wrist and bolted for the next ride, sometimes almost pushing kids over. When you finally got to the line you stood there with a triumphant look on your face. “Let’s see who gets scared now!” You said.

“Why? [Y/N] what is this line for?” You pointed on the map and Demyx scoffed.

“Splash Mountain? Baby, I am water.”

\-----

“AHHH!” Demyx screamed as the two of your flew down the forty-nine foot drop into a pool on water that led you through singing and dancing animatronics. Demyx was still screaming throughout the soft after ride through a song that constantly repeated “Zippadeedoodah.” When the two of you finally got off, Demyx has finally stopped screaming.

“Are you okay?” You asked.

“Let’s go again!” Demyx shouted.

“Ah! How about we go ride something else?” You asked. Demyx nodded his head as you brought out the map. “We can go to the submarine then it should be time for dinner.” The two of you then headed over to the submarine ride while talking about work and how annoying the crowds were here. The two of you finally made it to the submarine line and leaned against the railing.

“You wait here, and I’ll go get us some ice cream.” Demyx said. You nodded and looked at the line, there would be more than enough time to eat that ice cream and then some. Soon, Demyx came back with sea salt ice cream in the shape of the famous mascot’s head. He handed you one then climbed over the railing to eat his. The two of you ate in silence for a while.

“Did you win?” You asked him as the two of you finished. Your stick did not have a winner on it. Demyx turned his stick over as he finished it and shook his head. “Oh well.” You said. It seemed that the two of you had ran out of things to talk about, but in actuality Demyx was beginning to get nervous. Suddenly you remembered the time Demyx had confessed to you and you began to rub your temples, hoping for the memory to disappear. Soon, the two of you were led down into a submarine and were crammed once again like sardines with a lot of strangers. When the ride started suddenly the two of you had a lot to talk about again.

“Hey look at that fish!” Demyx said. The two of you giggled and pointed out animatronics and holograms to each other until the ride was over. You checked the time and it was already getting late, which meant dinner time.

“Are you hungry?” You asked. Demyx shook his head and became very excited as he dragged you to the place. You were back where you were earlier that day. He led you through the tiny streets until you were in front of a restaurant. He went up to the desk and said his name. He came back to lead you inside where the two of you sat to wait for a table. “What’s so special about this place anyways?” You looked over to Demyx who was about to explode.

“It’s a surprise.” He said, trying to keep himself from spoiling it. Soon, the two of you were led to a candlelit table. When you were sat down and situated you looked up to Demyx who finally exploded. “We’re inside the pirate ride!” He whisper shouted. A few people from surrounding tables glared at you two. You then looked around and past them to see people in boats at the beginning of the pirate ride from last time.

“Oh hey it is!” You said. Before long the two of you were sipping on mint juleps and people watching the boats that went by. When the food came the two of you challenged each other on who could eat the most without taking a sip of julep since the food was really spicy. In the end you had surprised yourself by winning. The two of you sat there rubbing your full bellies when the food was done.

“I won that match, now watch me finally beat you at Astroblasters. It’s rematch time.” You smirked. The two of you left way too much munny on the table before dashing out of the restaurant. Soon the two of you were in the line that started outside and you realized it was already dark out. The two of you talked about the food and Demyx told you about the other restaurants that they had. Before you knew it, you were sitting down waiting to kick Demyx’s ass. Last time he had won, but you figured that after watching Xigbar on your last mission with him you could finally win this baby shooting game.

\-----

“I lost…” You said. “By one point…” You groaned. Demyx laughed and tried to cheer you up.

“It was only one more shot and we would have tied!” He said. You shook your head and brought out the map. Suddenly, your eyes lit up.

“Space Mountain!” You shouted. You dragged Demyx away from Astroblasters and rushed across the way to Space Mountain. It was a dark rollercoaster and it was the best way to end the night. Before Demyx could comprehend what was happening, he was already strapped in and the two of you were about to take off.

“W-wait a minute [Y/N], I’m not so sure about this one!” Were his final words before the ride started. The two of you were thrashed around in dark twists, turns, and drops until you were finally blinded by a flash of light. You two got out safely and looked at your picture. You compared it to your Splash Mountain picture from earlier and went over to buy it. You put the pictures into the backpack and smiled.

“I’ll put them in that scrapbook you looked at.” You said.

“But that’s filled with your old Somebody friends.” Demyx said. “And your past life.”

“It’s filled with my friends.” You smiled.

\-----

“This has been long overdue.” Saix said as he leaned back in his chair. You watched as dusks set up a table between two of you. They put a tablecloth on top then another brought over a flower in a tiny long vase. Finally they lit candles then stood back to wait for further instructions from Saix. 

The two of you were on top of one of the skyscrapers in The World That Never Was. In the distance you could see the castle and Kingdom Hearts shown down on the two of you. As you took in the scenery a dusk came over to give you a glass of water. You looked up to see Saix giving the dusks more tasks. He took notice of you and decided to talk.

“[Y/N], what was it like?” Saix asked.

“What was what like?” You questioned.

“Life without your comrades.” He answered. You bit your lip and looked down, suddenly feeling guilty.

“Well...I sort of learned to live without you all. I kinda...forgot about you, but you were all always in the back of my mind. I didn’t like to look at old pictures or saved things, it would make me cry.” You explained. Saix nodded his head. A few dusks came by with breadsticks and tiny plates to put on the table. Saix gave them another command then shooed them away.

“Saix...what’s the purpose of all this?” You asked. Saix closed his eyes.

“At some point, I realized why you chose Lea over me in the past.” Saix started. He opened his eyes and looked out towards the distance, away from you. “I wasn’t strong enough. There was no way I could protect you. You deserve someone who can provide for you.”

“Are you saying I’m weak?” You assumed.

“Not at all.” Saix looked up to you. “Axel made me weak. So I dismissed him.” 

“He’s our friend, Saix.” Saix shook his head.

“There are a multitude of things besides my romantic feelings for you that have provided me with evidence to make a decision.” Saix looked down at the table. “Long ago he stopped helping me with our inside project to find out what happened to that girl. Then he befriended the puppet, making her corrupt with power which in turn made us lose her and Roxas, leaving us with only one keyblade bearer.”

“Xion and Roxas aren’t all Axel’s fault. It’s all of our faults. We didn’t make them feel welcome enough to stay.” You looked down at the bread and sighed before taking one.

“[Y/N], in the end, Axel is not the same.” Saix said.

“None of us are the same.” You said, finally taking a bite of the breadstick. “I promised Axel, that when we get our hearts back everything would go back to the way it was.” You looked up and smiled. “We’ll all be friends again. Zexion too.”

Saix looked at you with soft eyes before he realized something. “Then you’ll go back to loving Lea?” He asked. You shook your head.

“I don’t know what true love is, Isa. But you do.” He looked shocked. His look was interrupted by dusks bringing [favorite food] to the table. The two of you began to silently eat before Saix broke the silence.

“[Y/N], is that why you can’t choose?” He asked.

“You can’t just say things out of context and expect me to know what you’re saying.” You looked up and smiled at him before going back to your food.

“[Y/N], I can show you what true love is.” You looked up to Saix. His eyes were intense as they tried to read your face. You looked back down to your food and put your fork down. Your intertwined your fingers then looked up.

“I’d like that, Isa.”


	36. Chapter XXXVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.

The room was gray and empty except for the filled bookshelves lined around. A dark corridor was created and out you stepped into the library. You sat down in the middle as always and began to reflect on Ienzo and his time here. You wondered and thought what kind of advice he would give you if he were here.

Ienzo used to send you letters when he went to the castle. They weren’t as often as you had hoped, but they were something. You had spent time earlier rummaging through your old things on your homeworld trying to find these letters to put into your scrapbook.

They were all filled with cute little nothings such as “I grew a pretty flower”, “I made myself a sandwich for the first time!”, or “I asked if I could have a cat and my master said no.” You leaned back against a bookshelf and smiled as you thought of sweet life when you were a clueless child.

Your thoughts were interrupted by another dark corridor forming in the room. Saix walked through and stepped over to you. He crouched down to your level. He grimaced slightly, but it was soon replaced with a serious look. 

“[Y/N]. It’s very important.” He stated. You looked up and nodded before taking the hand he offered to help you up. He looked around to make sure no one was there before he started. “He’s leaving.”

“Lea?” You immediately questioned. Saix nodded his head. “And we’re just allowing it?”

“Apparently he’s on a special mission...but I suspect he’ll never return from it.” Saix said. You grit your teeth in anger before sighing and letting it go. “He’s lost his way. He’s forgotten of our true goal.” He continued.

“Did you mean the girl?” You asked. “Did he...like her?” It would make a lot of sense if he did, although he did totally forget about the operation as he began to be friends with Roxas.

Saix scoffed. “We don’t know much of her. She was a prisoner and no one knew of her. I suspect our...leader...isn’t so trustworthy.” He explained. Your jaw slightly dropped. You never imagined you would hear Saix badmouth Xemnas. He was so good at being loyal...even if it was for a selfish reason.

“We’ll find her.” You said, placing a hand on his arm. He put his hand over yours and enclosed it. 

“All we can do is try.”

\-----

“Hey, Demyx.” You said as you walked into his room. You closed the dark corridor behind you. Demyx looked up from his bed as he was strumming his sitar. You sat down on a chair. He stopped strumming and put the instrument down.

“What brings you here?” He asked. You swung your legs against the chair and shrugged your shoulders.

“I dunno. We’re friends. Friends hang out.” You said. Demyx nodded his head before picking his sitar back up and continuing to play. You listened to the melody and smiled. You thought of Ienzo and Roxas...but something else felt like it was missing. Your smile faltered as you tried to dig deep into your mind to remember.

Was there someone else?

\-----

Footsteps echoed the hallway as Axel approached your figure. You were leaning against a wall as the two of you locked eyes, but Axel kept walking. He was already a few steps past you when you decided to speak up.

“You’re not even going to say goodbye?” He stopped and slightly turned his head back towards you.

“I didn’t think anyone would miss me.” He said. That stung...it was awfully familiar to what Roxas had said when he decided to leave the organization. You began to wonder if Isa’s words were right. Was Lea really using this “mission” as a way to escape?

“That’s a lie. You know Isa and I would.” You protested. Axel scoffed and turned his head back forward. He began to take a step but stopped himself before saying one last thing.

“It’s alright. You have each other to keep company while I’m gone.”

\-----

Sand blew up and around as the wind flowed throughout Agrabah. Citizens were bustling in the streets as Sora, Donald, and Goofy roamed. Along the way they fought heartless and protected citizens as they wandered the world.

Up above on the rooftops stood a menacing evil. It hopped down to the trio, startling them from the sound of the impact. Goofy turned around, “Sora, look!” The trio all turned to see a girl standing there in a short black dress. She wore black pants underneath and black boots.

“Oh! I’m sorry. Did I scare you?” She asked. Sora looked to Donald and Goofy out of confusion. Donald started to tease Sora for being scared. “Is everything alright...Roxas?”

“Roxas…? The organization!” Sora exclaimed. The trio readied themselves up to fight. Your heartless laughed.

“Oh Roxas...how I miss my friend dearly.” She stated with a smirk.

“Stop calling me that!” Sora yelled. She started to back away before creating a dark corridor and leaving. “Hey! Come back here!” Sora yelled. He tried to chase her but was left with nothing when the portal closed.

“Over here.” She said, giggling. She was suddenly behind Sora. He stepped back and drew his keyblade closer. “Why so mad?” She asked.

“Because you cause nothing but trouble!” He shouted. Your heartless rolled her eyes, becoming bored with teasing Sora..

“You don’t even know the half of it.” She replied. She snapped her fingers and heartless appeared. Sora, Donald, and Goofy were surrounded before they could realize that she was gone. When the heartless were finally defeated Sora looked around desperately trying to find her.

“Sora, she’s gone now.” Goofy said, trying to calm down his friend.

“I’m so sick of the organization!”


	37. Chapter XXXVII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, but I’m crying too.

Today’s mission required all members to participate. Today would be a great day for collecting hearts. The Organization was counting on you and Sora to defeat numerous heartless today. How Xemnas predicted this stuff? You had no idea, but you knew that you had an important job to do.

You stared at the mission objectives and wondered if by “all members” that meant Axel too. It had been awhile since he left. You often went on missions collecting hearts, usually with Demyx. Saix was far too busy organizing missions out for the rest of the members as they created more heartless and dusks appearing in the worlds. Everyday felt like a cycle of leaving with Demyx and having a fun time with your friend to “honey I’m home” when you got back to Saix. 

“It’s alright. You have each other to keep company while I’m gone.”

The stinging words of Axel echoed through your mind. He was basically right. These past few days you and Saix had grown...very close. Throw in a kid and you’d be a bittersweet family. The two of you had shared various moments all the while keeping it hidden from the other members. You feared what Xemnas, Xigbar, or the others would suspect if they realized the two of you were involved romantically.

At times you felt horrible due to the fact that you couldn’t comprehend love. You said that you could live without a heart before, but now you knew that wasn’t true. You wanted your heart back for many reasons. One being so you could understand what real love is. Another to comprehend other feelings you had never felt before. You wanted to know them all: love, jealousy, pride. 

“[Y/N], are you prepared?” You were knocked out of your thoughts from Saix approaching you. All around the rest of the organization was gathered in the room, ready to depart for Radiant Garden.

“Is everyone waiting on me?” You asked.

“Of course. Can’t take off unless little miss keyblade is ready to kick some ass.” You looked over to Xigbar who was smirking. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes as you put your hood up. 

“I’m ready.” You stated. Then one by one dark corridors were forming. You created one and went through, not knowing exactly what to expect from Sora and his friends.

“Hey, [Y/N].” You turned within your portal to see Demyx walking over. 

“We need to hurry and step out.” You said. You looked around trying to find the exit for Radiant Garden. Demyx chuckled nervously before putting a hand on your shoulder.

“[Y/N]. I have a really special mission...and I was wondering if you could stay close by and...lend me some power?” He asked. You raised an eyebrow, not sure as to what he meant besides moral support. You looked around to make sure no one else was there before answering.

“Just make it quick.” You stated. Demyx thanked you before leading you to a different area to exit through the portal. He looked around before spotting what he needed.

“Okay, can you stay here and I’ll go down there?” He asked.

“Demyx, just what IS this mission?” You asked. Demyx looked back as he created a dark corridor to lead him down from the cliff. 

“Just to distract Sora for a while, nothing much.” He said, obviously nervous. You chuckled. 

“Good luck.” Demyx nodded before entering the portal and coming back down at the bottom of the cliff. You watched as Sora and his friends approached Demyx. Sora looked very ready to fight and slightly agitated. You bit your lip out of confusion.

“We’re the bad guys…” You whispered.

You watched as Demyx fought Sora with his water clones and Sora took little to no time to defeated them. He then approached Demyx and started to fight him with his keyblade. You winced at every time Demyx was hit. You wondered if you should interfere at all. Demyx proved you wrong by knocking Sora back and creating even more water clones. You gasped as you had never seen him create that much before. You then smiled, happy that Demyx was starting to win. You looked around, wondering if it was about time for him to leave and stop distracting Sora. 

You created a dark corridor to help yourself off of the cliff. You walked out to see the two still fighting. Demyx must’ve saw you because he shot you a grin before attempted to fight Sora back. But now that you were closer, you saw that something was very wrong. Demyx was growing tired. You wondered again if you should step in to help him escape. But you had underestimated just how tired Demyx was. Sora slashed your friend and he dropped to the ground on his knees. His sitar vaporized.

“Demyx? Demyx!” You shouted as you ran towards the scene. Demyx cried out in agony as he disappeared in a vast of darkness and bubbled. You crouched down where he just was and grabbed at the ground. He was gone. No...not again...this couldn’t be happening. You felt the tears drop down and fall to the ground from your hooded face.

“You want some too? Oh-” You heard Sora say. “Is she...crying?” Sora asked. You cried out, sobbing loudly as you recalled memories with Demyx. He was the last joyful person to be around. He turned into a very close friend of yours that you enjoyed talking to about your dilemmas and stresses. A fist hit the ground before you stood up, summoning your keyblade. You created a barrier, locking Sora in as you took a battle stance.

“So you think you know how to use the keyblade?” You taunted.

“Stop fooling me with your fake tears!” Sora said as he gritted his teeth and gripped his keyblade harder. You saw his knuckles turn white. That was a really bad habit that he had. He began to charge at you, but you used time magic. You walked behind him and put a hand on his back.

“Too slow.” You said as you pushed him to the ground when the magic wore off. Sora’s keyblade flew out of his hand. You pressed the tip of your keyblade to his back. “Stop gripping your keyblade so hard. It’s a disadvantage to you.” You stated. You then eliminated the barrier and created a dark corridor to escape into. You fell somewhere else onto the ground and the tears came back. You sobbed into the dirt until you heard footsteps. Instantly you straightened yourself out and stood up. But you relaxed once you realized it was Saix.

“Don’t tell me…” He trailed off. You nodded your head as you ran to him and he locked you into an embrace. 

“Sora...killed him.” You cried into his coat. “He was...my friend.” Saix ran his fingers through your hair as he let you cry for a few moments more before pulling away and looking you in the eyes.

“You have a mission to do. Go, channel your anger into the heartless.” He said. You nodded as you summoned your keyblade and rushed away.

“So Number IX is gone.” Saix looked up to see Axel. “What? No welcome home, buddy?” He asked. Saix scowled. “Hey, the report said every one of us, yeah? Well, I’m here.”

“Go...assist [Y/N] in collecting hearts.” Saix commanded. Axel created a dark corridor, hopefully leading to you.

“As you wish, your majesty.”

\-----

You huffed and puffed as you were surrounded by heartless. One charged at you and you hit it, instantly releasing the heart. You looked down at your hand, thinking about using time magic to help defeat them faster. You heart a few heartless get hit and you looked up, seeing a chakram coming at you and landing into someone’s hand right next to you. You looked up.

“Axel!” You exclaimed. The red haired man smirked.

“The one and only.” He replied. You smiled as the two of you began to fight off more heartless. After a what seemed like millions of hearts later, a claymore swung past your ear and hit a few heartless. You turned to see Saix and smiled. “About time you showed up.” Axel said. Saix scoffed.

“It’s time.” He called as he created a dark corridor. You and Axel nodded as you followed him through it.

\-----

The three of you appeared nearby to Xemnas as he spoke to Sora and his friend. Saix stopped you two from exiting the portal and called for the three of you to wait for the perfect moment. Axel shook his head and pushed passed the two of you.

“Way to fall right into their trap.” Axel said to Sora.

You looked at Saix with a confused look. “What’s he doing?!”

Axel casually leaned against a rock and closed the dark corridor, shutting the two of you away. “Come on, it’s a setup by the Organization.” Axel continued. “You’re being used to collect hearts and help them with Xemnas’ one true goal.” 

“Xemnas?” One of them questioned.

“Come on, the guy you just saw. He’s their leader. Got it memorized?” Axel replied. Sora and his friends seemed very confused. Wasn’t this guy also apart of the organization? Sora and his friends continued to question Axel. “Man you guys are slow.” Axel whined. “The organization wants hearts, which can only be released by the keyblade.”

“So what are you gonna do with the hearts?” They asked.

“Not telling.” Axel said. 

“You...you kidnapped Kairi!” Sora exclaimed. 

“Bingo. The name’s Axel. Got it memorized?”

“Where IS Kairi?” He asked. Axel looked around nervously, about to answer. “Please! Tell me!” 

“Look, I’m sorry about Kairi-”

“Axel.” You and Saix said as you approached the scene. You kept your hood on, but your keyblade in hand.

“Uh-oh.” Axel said before using a dark corridor to escape. You watched as Saix spoke to Sora.

“Don’t worry, we’ll be sure that he receives the maximum punishment.” Saix said.

“Hey...why do you guys need Sora when you already got a keyblade wielder?” One of Sora’s friends said. You walked over to the group as Saix held them back from you. 

“Oh, we’ve always had two keyblade wielders...Roxas.” You said. “Hey Saix, little ol’ Sora here still doesn’t believe that Nobodies can feel.” You extended your keyblade towards Sora. “Big mistake.” You walked closer to Sora, putting your keyblade down. “You’re lucky we need you. You’ll pay for making Demyx disappear.”

“Stop lying!” Sora shouted. “You can’t feel.”

“My tears are real, Roxas.” Sora looked angered.

“It’s Sora!” He said with gritted teeth.

“I can feel, clearly.” You created a dark corridor and started to back away into it. “Sora.” You disappeared into the portal and came back out into Demyx’s room. You stalked over to his bed and sat down, gripping the sheets as tears continuously flowed down. 

“I’m sorry...I couldn’t protect you.”


	38. Chapter XXXVIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be 45 chapters in this story. This might be my last update before I go on vacation for two weeks. Then we’ll really be in the home stretch. But don’t worry, the sequel to this book is already planned. I still have to make the outline, but the plot points are written out. 
> 
> Enough with that, here’s more edge.

[Y/N] stood alone in the Proof of Existence. You looked down at Number IX’s portal, which was open but unlit. Reaching out to touch the frame, you fought back tears. Before your hand could make contact, you pulled away. 

“[Y/N].” Startled, you slightly jumped up and turned around. Your eyes met with Axel’s. Your face went from surprised to infuriated.

“Do you know how much trouble you’re in?!” You shouted. Axel waved his hands in defense then walked closer to you. “Saix is going to-”

“No he’s not.” He interrupted. “I finished my mission.”

“We thought you ran away…” You said. You looked back to Demyx’s portal.

“Sorry…” Axel said. You turned back to face him and he extended a hand to your shoulder. “I know you two were close.” He explained. You looked down to your feet, but Axel used his other hand to move your chin up. “Come on, I have something to show you.” He put an arm around your shoulder then created a dark corridor.

You hesitated for a moment which he took notice of. He looked to your face as if asking for any ounce of trust you might still hold for him. You eventually took a step forward and let him lead you into a room you hadn’t been in before.

“Where are we?” You asked. Axel didn’t say anything, he only gestured for you to go forward. You raised an eyebrow at him and he proceeded to encourage you to go first. You shrugged your shoulders and decided to move forward. 

“Who’s there?!” Someone shouted. She sounded very frightened. Walking forward a red haired girl came closer into your view. You quickly put on your hood before she could see your face. “What do you want?” She asked. You could see the girl shiver as you came closer.

“What’s your name?” You asked. She hesitated for a moment before realizing that you were a girl too. For some odd reason this calmed her. Maybe she could beg you for more humane treatment such as a real bathroom. As a girl she hoped you would understand.

“I’m...Kairi.” She finally said. “Who are you?” She asked again. Kairi tried to look past your hood, but couldn’t see anything.

“I’m…” You looked back to see Axel egging you on to talk to her, but he stayed out of her sight. This must have been his entire mission and who he was taunting Sora with. “You’re Sora’s friend, aren’t you?” You asked. Her eyes perked up immediately.

“You know Sora?!” She asked, very excited to find out this new piece of information.

“I’ve met him a few times. He needs to work on a few things here and there…” You started. Kairi raised an eyebrow, confused as to what you meant. You smirked, although you knew she couldn’t see it under your hood. You summoned your keyblade and watched her jaw slightly drop.

“Why are you with them?” She asked. “You should be fighting for the light.” Kairi explained.

“I fight for my friends.” You retorted. She took a step back from the bars. “Roxas...was my friend. Sora is apart of Roxas now, you must know this.” Kairi nodded her head, recalling the time she spoke to him before in her mind.

“That makes Sora your friend.” Kairi said. You made your keyblade disappear and you walked closer to the bars. 

“I guess it does.” You stared her down for a while, letting her see some of your facial features by being this close. Kairi studied your face for a while before you began to back away.

“Wait!” She called out, but you had already created a dark corridor behind you. You took a step inside as you continued to back up. “Who are you?!” She called.

“The Toxic Synthesis.”

\-----

“So you talked to her.” Xigbar said as he continued to walk up the mountain. You didn’t hear him at first, as you were spaced out. Your mind was jumbled with what to think of Axel even though Saix obviously saw a broken relationship. “Head in the clouds? Are you ready for the mission?” He asked. You finally broke from your daze and looked up to him.

“Who?” You asked. Your steps became taller and taller as you climbed up the snowy mountain. You wondered why you couldn’t have just used a dark corridor to get to the cave.

“The prisoner.” He snorted. You raised an eyebrow and looked away from your snowy feet.

“I just intimidated her with some Sora stuff.” You flipped a hand in his direction. He rolled his eyes before pointing.

“So I’m gonna go wake up this thing, and you need to look out for any keyblade wielders.” He explained. You nodded and summoned your keyblade, waiting outside as he went in.

As if on cue, it suddenly became eerie outside. You could’ve swore that you heard footsteps crunching in the snow. 

“Oh please.” You said as you turned around. Your keyblade clashed against another’s as you saw a shocked face. “Did I scare you?” You ask. You snickered as you used time magic to walk behind the guy and kick him into the snow.

“Who are you?!” He shouted. 

“I should be asking you the same thing.” You retorted. You waited for him to get up from the snow and go back into his stance. “What are you? Sora’s friend? Kairi’s friend?” You asked. His breath hitched for a second and you realized you must have guessed right. Then, Zexion’s words had flashed into your mind.

“Riku?” You asked. The boy looked startled. He then smirked.

“Are you a friend of Roxas?” He asked. You took a step back as you remembered the reports. Riku had defeated Roxas and brought him back to complete Sora.

“Get lost.” You said as you used time magic to walk behind him again. At that moment the dragon heartless emerged from the cave and began to fly towards the city. “You have other business to attend to, don’t you?” You whispered into his ear. He jumped forward and prepared to fight you. Riku looked between the dragon then to you before chasing after the heartless.

“You good, kid?” Xigbar asked.

“Yeah...I’m fine.”

\-----

“What’s this?” You asked as Saix sat down next to you. He handed you a book and mustered a small smile. 

“Roxas’ diary.” He replied. Your eyes opened wide as you frantically went through the pages. After a while you has slowed down to read each page carefully.

“I feel bad.” You said after a while. Saix put a hand on your shoulder which in turn caused you to look up at him. “We just let him go…”

“It was for the best.” He said. You looked at him with shock.

“But you fought him. You tried to keep him from leaving.” You said.

“In the end, it is what the Superior wanted.” Saix explained. You sighed and gripped onto the journal.

“It’s always about Xemnas…”


	39. Chapter XXXIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I’m back from my trip and my jet lag is gone. It was the first time I went on a plane or even went to another country! If you are interested in my recent trip to the Azores islands and would like to know/see more...please message me!
> 
> Anyways, we last left off with the reader fighting Riku, meeting Kairi, and realizing more and more about Sora/Roxas. Here’s 39/45

Saix looked down at [Y/N]’s sleeping form in his bed. Her head laid gently against his chest as her breathing tickled his skin. One of her hands rested against his stomach as she slept.

It was another one of those nights. The two shared memories, laughter, and sorrows as they went through each other’s lives with and without each other. Everytime Saix learned something new about [Y/N]. Usually about her early childhood or adulthood without him or Lea in the picture.

Saix admired [Y/N] for a few moments longer until he felt a presence in the room. He let out an angered sigh before looking up to see Xigbar.

“Took you long enough.” Xigbar taunted.

Saix made a face of disgust, knowing that there was nothing he could say in his defense to Xigbar as he was a high ranking than him. “What?” He settled with a passive response.

“It’s time for the lovebirds to rise and shine. Number III has been looking for [Y/N] as she has a very important assignment today.” Xigbar smirked before coming down from the ceiling. “I hope you two used protection.”

Saix snarled at Xigbar and threw the blanket off of the two of you. “There is nothing indecent here.” He explained. “She fell asleep.” The two men stared at you, fully clothed besides your coat, as you stirred in your sleep.

\-----

“What do you want to be when you grow up anyways, [Y/N]?” Lea asked from across the roof. Between them sat Isa as he gazed upon the sunset. Lea was laying down with his hands behind his head while Isa was sitting with his hands leaning behind him for support. You sat with your knees up and your arms around them. Usually you rested your chin or head on your knees.

“Where did that come from?” You questioned. You looked to Lea to find his eyes searching you for answer. You lightly blushed and looked back to the sunset. “Uh...I don’t know.” You answered.

Isa scoffed. “That’s a lie.” 

“So you DO know!” Lea shouted. A few birds flew off of the rooftops from the echo of his shout. 

You glared at Isa. He knew about your interest in synthesis. He often complimented your knowledge of it and suggested that you take a look into the field. You always complained that the Moogles would never let you outrun their business.

“Well...I sorta like to synthesize things.” You admitted. Isa had a smile plastered across his face. He had known about your secret for quite a while now. You didn’t know why he chose now of all times to reveal it.

“That’s so cool!” Lea exclaimed. “So you can like make potions and stuff?”

“I’ve never tried to make anything really. I just know about it.” You hid your face in your knees. “Can we just watch the sunset?” You whined. You heard Isa chuckle and Lea complain. It took a few moments for Isa to calm Lea down before you felt a tap on your shoulder. You looked up to see Isa holding an ice cream.

“Where the hell were you keeping that this whole time?!” You exclaimed. Isa rolled his eyes.

“Just take it.” You grabbed the ice cream as you held a confused look on your face. “Isn’t it nice to tell the truth?”

\-----

“I...Isa what time is it?” You slowly opened your eyes and began to stretch as you sat up in Saix’s bed. “And why is Xigbar here?” You then looked around to see how wrong the situation you were in had appeared to be. “I swear I just fell asleep.”

“Your boyfriend already explained. It’s mission time. III is waiting for you.” Xigbar said. You looked around for your coat and grabbed it before following Xigbar out.

“Why did you have to come and get me?” You asked. Xigbar chuckled.

“You have to stay on your toes. We’re getting closer.” He said.

“What are you talking about?” Xigbar turned back to look at your confused face and chuckled. He continued to walk in front of you. “What’s so funny?” You retorted.

“Your face.” He answered. Before you could get upset, you remembered that your coat was still in your hands. You finally put it on as you continued to follow Xigbar.

“Number VI.” Xaldin’s voice resonated in the hallway. You finished zipping up your coat then looked up to the very tall man.

“Ready to go.” You said. Xaldin created a dark corridor then began to explain things.

“This mission is very important. All I need you to do is hide the rose. Wait for my signal.” You stepped out of the portal and entered a badly damaged room. On a small table sat a rose within a protective glass. Before you could ask any questions, Xaldin had disappeared. You sat and waited with the rose for a while before Xaldin’s head popped out of a dark corridor. 

“Is this the signal?” You asked as you grabbed the rose. Xaldin nodded his head then motioned for you to come inside the portal.

“Wait here for a few moments, then step out and place it onto the balcony. When you are finished you must retreat. You cannot be seen.” He explained. You nodded before asking a question.

“How long?”

“You’ll know.” He then disappeared and left you to wait inside of the portal. You thought about your dream from last night. It had been a while since you synthesized something. You didn’t go back to your house as much these days. The castle was also becoming more and more gloomy. 

After a while, you followed Xaldin’s directions and exited the portal. You were on a balcony where you left the rose then went back into the dark corridor. You closed it behind you and exited just outside of the castle. There you heard a few voices as well as Xaldin’s. You couldn’t make out what they were saying. You decided to stay away until it was quiet. 

When it was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop, you got closer to the gate and looked through. Xaldin emerged, riding the wind, as he fought Sora and his friends. You watched the battle unfold. It seemed as if Xaldin was winning. You decided you had no further need to be here. So you created a dark corridor. You walked through for a few moments before you heard something unsettling. Had Xaldin been defeated? You turned around and ran back to the scene where you saw Xaldin disappear.

“Not again…”

\-----

“Too many times have I witnessed members fall to a keyblade.” You announced. You looked around the room. All that was left...Xemnas, Xigbar, Saix, Axel, and Luxord. With Xaldin gone, you had risen to third in charge. 

“It is true, our numbers have fallen. But we need not fret.” Xemnas replied. You looked around as everyone else seemed to agree with Xemnas.

“Now is the time to decide...is Sora more of a threat than a help? I could end him now-”

“Silence.” You looked to Saix who had no emotions on his face. You sighed, realizing you were letting the power get to your head.

“We all know you are very capable, VI, but there will be no need.” Xemnas replied. He smirked. “Dismissed.” You watched as one by one the rest of the Organization disappeared.

“[Y/N]...” You looked down to Saix, who had an apologetic look on his face. 

“It’s fine. I know.” You said before disappearing. You soon felt your feet hit the floor and heard a gasp. You looked up to see Kairi come up to the bars.

“It’s you.” She said. You stayed where you were, a few feet away from the cell.

“Sora had defeated another Organization member.” You announced. Kairi looked to have a glimmer of hope in her eyes.

“He’s coming for me…” She muttered.

You looked around before coming closer to the cell. Kairi backed up a bit from the bars that you were now touching.

“I...can help.” Kairi’s eyes sparked with curiosity. “When he’s here...I can help.” You looked around, suspicious if anyone had heard you. You then created a dark corridor and began to back into it. “Hold tight.”

\-----

“So you’ve finally realized it.” Within the dark corridor you froze. “Hey, don’t worry. We’re on the same side.” You turned around to face Axel. He walked closer towards you.

“Something isn’t right.” You said. You looked around, scared that someone would hear.

“Don’t worry. I’ll help get him here.” Axel said. He then walked past you and towards an exit. You watched as he disappeared.

“Okay...I trust you.”


End file.
